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#1
this is gonna be long... but here's the deal...

i work at an engineering firm that has a company softball team, we are all pretty good friends, some more than others, but whatever, you get the idea...

we were supposed to have our opening game last night at 8:45 as scheduled. it has been raining for like 3 days straight here off and on and was doing so yesterday all day. so i asked our coach (a coworker as well) if he had called the rain out hotline to see if the game was still on for a number of reasons:

1) i had numerous errands to run including eating dinner with the parents (not really a big deal, could do them another night)
2) a girl im dating and actually really like, is leaving for 3 months of training in another state for her doctorate in a week and ahalf and i have no idea where she will eventually settle once she is done with those 3 months. (i.e. may never see her again)
3) it was one of my boss's birthdays and i was personally invited to their house for dinner & drinking.. basically good times.. i am really good friends with him and his wife and im the only person in the office that gets invited to their house on a regular basis.

okay, so back to the story...

so he calls the hotline and informs me that we are still on as scheduled because the rec. department doesnt want to reschedule the first games and get behind already.

the rain continues for the next two hours or so and i ask him to please call them again and double check because i have other things that id like to do if it is cancelled and need to know sooner than later. 5 minutes later i get a mass email forwarded from him to the team that is from the head of the rec. department saying the game is still on as scheduled. 5 minutes before work, he sends another mass emial to the team saying it sucks, but if you guys dont show you will have to sit out for the next 2 games...

so at this point, i suck it up and start cancelling ****... cancel my dinner with the girl im dating, blow my boss off too his face (politely of course) for the softball game, and haul ass to run a few quick errands...

i head up there 35 minutes before the game, and guess what.. lighs are all off.. no one is there but me...

i dial two of my "friends" at the office, guys i consider better friends than others, and neither of them answer... so i basically say **** it and go home

this morning i found out it was an elaborate prank that the whole tema was in on from the start.... and the two douche bags who didnt answer my call were 3 blocks from the field at a brewery's grand opening drinking beer for free.

so i blew all that **** off for a joke.. and im pissed..

so heres what i need.. i need ideas to get revenge, serious ones are better, but i imagine ill have funny ones too, whatever.... my bro, the infamousZ, gave me the idea of putting laxative in the gatorade at our first game, but i dunno...

so come on pit, sling me some ideas!
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
Last edited by faigenistic at Apr 2, 2008,
#2
1. Train pigs into ferocious killers.
2. Introduce victims to pigs in some sort of muddy pit without escape.
3. ?????
4. Profit!
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#3
Ipecac+Gatorade=Sweet sweet revenge.

None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#4
Rape them, rape them all
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#6
Viagra/laxatives/other substance in drink
Hull City A.F.C

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#8
They did it for the lul iz!
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Also you're off topic. This thread is about Reva eating snowmen.
#9
Haha viagra would be funnier than laxatives. Either that or kill them
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#10
Bring a "fake" gun to work and pull it out in the office. (the gun not ur dick)
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#11
problem with spiking the kool-aids is that ther ear elike 5 or so gusy on the team that had nothing to do with it and dont work with us... so thatd be kind of cruel... no idea if i can warm them someone either without them giving it up
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#12
Kill all their families and then shout 'APRIL FOOLS'.
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#13
Bring a "fake" gun to work and pull it out in the office. (the gun not ur dick)


i actually like my job and profession... plus jail sucks
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#14
I said not ur dick
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#15
haha, true
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
Last edited by faigenistic at Apr 2, 2008,
#16
Dude, it sounds like those guys are complete dicks. You could download porn onto their work computers and then 'inform' your boss about it.
It all makes sense
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#17
Dude, it sounds like those guys are complete dicks. You could download porn onto their work computers and then 'inform' your boss about it.


best idea yet.... i like the way u think
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#19
Quote by syngates92
Quote by faigenistic
Quote by syngates92
Bring a "fake" gun to work and pull it out in the office. (the gun not ur dick)
i actually like my job and profession... plus jail sucks
I said not ur dick



I wonder if i can sig that.
#21
yeah go for it
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#23
Quote by Kensai
1. Train pigs into ferocious killers.
2. Introduce victims to pigs in some sort of muddy pit without escape.
3. ?????
4. Profit!


South Park! that was hilarious
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#24
south park isnt exactly doable, but noice
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#26
I suggest sealing off their office doors/cubicle doors with suran wrap and filling them with packing peanuts.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#27
I suggest sealing off their office doors/cubicle doors with suran wrap and filling them with packing peanuts.


great idea, very doable, but could get exspensive?
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#28
You could be the bigger man and just not do anything.... Apologize to everyone you had to blow off and explain what happened to them.

I'd rather let them live in the fear of having physical revenge.... Mind games are so much fun. =)
#29
hmmm $25/20 cubic feet of packing peanuts............... interesting.....
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#30
You could be the bigger man and just not do anything.... Apologize to everyone you had to blow off and explain what happened to them.


already did, but they are suggesting the revenge... so i almost feel obligated
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#31
hide some rotting fish in their work space. That 70's show anyone?
what a waste of a perfectly good sig.
#33
1. get plastic bag

2. put dog crap in plastic bag

3. go to their house

4. light crap bag on fire

5. ring doorbell

6. RUN!

7. ???

8. Profit!

This is Larry The If you click him, he will give you magic powers.
srsly.


If you are not willing to die for the perfect s'more, Then you don't deserve a s'more at all.
#34
if you could explain the "profit!" part i think we'd all like to know how to profit off of fiery dog poo
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#35
Quote by faigenistic
thats the plural form hah


There is no apostrophe for a plural. It would be lulz (notwithstanding the spelling).

As for the prank - I saw a thread here not long ago that had a device which beeped at a high frequency at random times. It was really small so could be well hidden. Place a couple of those in your office and watch everybody go mad...
#36
Packing peanuts would be cheap and in alot of cases free.

If you can sneak their keys away from them you could put rotting fish somewhere on/in their car where they could not locate it for weeks and ruin their life for awhile. I suggest somehow in the AC vents.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#37
packing peanuts is the best so far, least collateral damage so to speak...

plus my uncle in Pittsburgh works for UPS and im sure if i called him he'd ship me a ton of it for damn near free... im talking 60 cubic feet or son, and i live about 2 miles from the office and have a key to get in at any time

but i bet id have to help clean it up.. damnnn.....
...even when i'm sleepin' i'm keepin' it real.
#38
Laxative.
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+1

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#39
superglue their cars shut!
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