#1
Hey guys, I'm just now getting back into posting on UG and I have this song from my band. I wondered what you guys think of it. Thanks in advance, link me to yours and I'll try to critique it. I don't really think that I'm much of a writer, but I'll let you know my opinion. The title has nothing to do with the lyrics but here they are.

One Beat Off Mt. Fuji

Verse 1
Let's say we go back to my place
and have a few drinks?
I'm gonna show you a good time regardless.
Turn the lights down low.
Turn the lights
down low.

Chorus
Dang Girl,
the way you move those hips.
The way
you move those hips,
it should
be a crime!

Verse 2
We move slow,
but we both know what we came here to do.
Let's not pretend
chivalry is still alive.
I killed it just for tonight.

repeat chorus

I keep my eyes on you.
I keep them tight as glue.
I keep my eyes on you.

repeat chorus


I have a recording of it on my band's myspace if you want to hear how it was put to music. www.myspace.com/thewinsystem
It's a rough recording but we are going back to the studio next weekend to get a better recording done. Anyway, what do you guys think?