#1
How to avoid a speeding ticket

I dunno whether this is old or not, but I found it and it's from my country, hopefully it gives someone some lulz
Quote by Aftertime
Thanks Mr. Heafyman! you're an absolute legend
Quote by Ex'sAndOh's
Porn is everywhere. Look around.
Porn is in the forest, in your parents bedroom, in the sea.
But most importantly, in your heart.
Quote by Hypnotisation
I take dumps all the time! I R TURDBURGLAR!
#2
An even better way is to not speed at all.
The will to neither strive nor cry,
The power to feel with others give.
Calm, calm me more; nor let me die
Before I have begun to live.

-Matthew Arnold

Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
#4
Quote by Dinkydaisy
An even better way is to not speed at all.


bet TS didnt think of that one
Fender American Standard Stratocaster
Ibanez TS-9
EHX Big Muff Pi
Companion Fuzz Box
EHX Pulsar
Boss DD-6
Fender Hot Rod Deville 212
#6
Quote by Dinkydaisy
An even better way is to not speed at all.


wow you should probably prefix your username with "Danger"

I bet you live on the wild side of life.
#8
Quote by CrazyDavey
wow you should probably prefix your username with "Danger"

I bet you live on the wild side of life.


Yeah, speeding is REAL wild, especially when you collide into the car nearest to you and kill the passengers.

#10
Quote by CrazyDavey
wow you should probably prefix your username with "Danger"

I bet you live on the wild side of life.

Excuse me for observing road safety. After getting hit by a fucking motorbike the other week I feel I'm perfectly entitled to.
The will to neither strive nor cry,
The power to feel with others give.
Calm, calm me more; nor let me die
Before I have begun to live.

-Matthew Arnold

Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
#11
Quote by Dinkydaisy
Excuse me for observing road safety. After getting hit by a fucking motorbike the other week I feel I'm perfectly entitled to.


hey, no need to swear

you know as they say

Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
#12
Quote by CrazyDavey
wow you should probably prefix your username with "Danger"

I bet you live on the wild side of life.

maybe shes just not a ****ing retard?
Quote by Yakult
If I get a boner I generally pass out due to the massive amount of blood having to be redirected from my brain


Quote by DubStar92
I like to video record myself when I'm drunk. It's like a mini-movie. I love fapping to the sex scene.
#13
Thats a pretty cool letter. Mad funny

You only have one lifetime. USE IT!!!

The Athiest of Zeppelinism. PM The Heartbreaker to join.

We Rock Out With Our Cocks Out!:UG Naked Club
#16
Could've been wittier, but kudos to him none-the-less.
Proud owner of an Engl Thunder 50 Reverb and an Ibanez S470

"The end is extremely fucking nigh..."
#18
I said I hope this gives people lulz, why is everyone assuming that I want to avoid speed tickets? I'm glad RPGoof got the right end of the stick.
Quote by Aftertime
Thanks Mr. Heafyman! you're an absolute legend
Quote by Ex'sAndOh's
Porn is everywhere. Look around.
Porn is in the forest, in your parents bedroom, in the sea.
But most importantly, in your heart.
Quote by Hypnotisation
I take dumps all the time! I R TURDBURGLAR!
#19
Quote by Dinkydaisy
An even better way is to not speed at all.

...What?
Quote by fukyu1980
LOL ! muther fuker i was gonna say that LOL!
#22
Quote by CrazyDavey
wow you should probably prefix your username with "Danger"

I bet you live on the wild side of life.


ZOMG I'm going 100mph on a highway with a 50 mph speed limit, I'm so badass!!