Page 1 of 98
Yes I know I'm ripping off of a rip-off. But I was getting bored reading Average Joe, so now its time for a new character. First choice that gets three votes wins.

You wake up from your after-school nap and look at the clock - 4 PM.

"Ughhh" you moan, it was time to get up and do some homework.

As you lazily roll off the couch your mom beings screaming at you to feed your cat, Mr. Bungle. You get to your feet and being walking towards the box of catfood. Slowly you pour it into your cat's bowl while thinking, How does he eat? It smells terrible

Mr. Bungle gobbles it up and you stare with disgust. Whatever. It was time for homework. You hated doing homework.

You reluctantly walk over towards your over-filled backpack and pull out your textbooks: Math, Science, and English. Ugh, 7th grade is hard.

Suddenly over the radio that your mom is listening to you hear that [insert favorite band here] is offering free tickets to the 9th caller. What do you do:

a) Math Homework
b) Science Homework
c) English Homework
d) Call the radio station and risk losing too much time on your homework(your mom will ground you if its not done before 5:30)

Long Overdue edit: Part 1
Part 2

That's a compilation of the story up to page 140 something. For you newcomers.
Last edited by guitarhero_764 at Apr 19, 2008,

Edit: You guys are so lame.
Quote by Altered_Carbon
That's some bony hipster sex, which may be the best kind.
Well, the answers clear.
Quote by Sloopy
I'm not in a wheelchair, but I own one just for fun.
D Wins

Fuck this, I'm calling that radio station.

You beeline towards the phone and dial the number. An operator comes online and tells you to wait. You wait anxiously for 5 minutes with no response. You hear on the radio,

"Ah, it looks like our 9th caller has just called in." You pray to god its you. Another call comes through. You almost piss yourself from the anxiety, finally.

The tone disapears..

"Congratulations Bobby Young, you are our ninth caller!!" the radio says.

GOD DAMMIT, you want to ram your face into the table but quickly calm yourself down.
You remember the other call and quickly answer it, its your Best Friend, James.

"Yo, since your b-day is next week and all I'm kinda wonderin what you want for your birthday."

Holy ****! You had forgotten! Your 13th birthday was next Friday.
You quickly respond with

a) Pokemon Pearl Version
b) Gibson SG
c) Condoms
d) 50 bucks
e) You're a ****ing douche bag
f) What matters most is our friendship, not the material goods
g) Clothes
Last edited by guitarhero_764 at Apr 12, 2008,
Since it's a preteen, C.
Bands to see before I die:
Iron Maiden
Foo Fighters
Reel Big Fish
Streetlight Manifesto

Epi LP Standard
Washburn Strat
Line 6 Spider (Yes, I know it's bad)

Ibanez RG3570Z
Digitech Whammy
Quote by DarkEra97
Pissed off kid needs to get laid and relieve stress, C

Just cuz he has condoms doesn't mean he's gonna get laid.

If I walked around my school with a pack of condoms, do you think I'd get laid?

Aw, hell naw. I wish it worked that way.
Quote by Rockford_rocks
Just cuz he has condoms doesn't mean he's gonna get laid.

If I walked around my school with a pack of condoms, do you think I'd get laid?

Aw, hell naw. I wish it worked that way.

Well this depends on a lot of things. If we were to make him a Pokemon fanboy, his chances of getting laid would drop. I didn't mean to imply that condoms cause 13-year-olds to get laid, but if the chance arose he would be prepared..
c for sure
Quote by C O B H C
I do believe so. I think heard it on TV once upon a time.

Edit: Wait, what the fuck was I watching on TV that had to do with ass hair?

Quote by sum_ugly_man

ndogg, is actually a kitty

Quote by jeff541
thanks ndogg.


Quote by Punk_Ninja
I applaud thee.
B Take the SG!

acutally no, A i'd love for this to turn into a create your own pokemon adventure
Quote by heaven's gate
I'm gonna have to get in on this, since that other fucker ditched the Zombie story.

if we had a zombie story, i'd probably piss myself from excitement. i want one!
C wins.

'Condoms!' You can get condoms for your birthday!

So, your birthday comes up and you open up all your presents. You finally open your pack of durex and feel incredibly horny just be looking at them. You thank your family for them, and rush up into your room to look at the box!

You rip them out of the packet. A condom falls to the floor. 'Uhhh, ohhhh!' You pick it up and it is covered in dirt. 'Gah, I knew I should have cleaned my floor when Mom asked me last night' you think.

You ponder about what you should do with the dirty condom:

A) Put it back in the packet and save it for later. You might get some 'action.'
B) Throw it in the bin. It's not worth using anymore.
C) Blow it up and throw it out of the window; following how far it gets.
D) Fap with it.
C wins


"Get me a couple of condoms"

"Wa-wha? When did you get good at picking up chicks?"

"James just get me those condoms, I got my eye on someone."

"Ohh man, I think I'm gonna get a b0ner..."

"Dude..." You hang up.

Why the hell am I friends with these kids. Never the less, once you showed the chicks at school your condoms, you'll be able to fill your life long dream. 13 years is far too long to wait. It was time.

"Do your f'in homework, your 7 year old brother says as he returns from school."

Sigh..elementary school was so 3 years ago. Anyways it was time to continue your homework. Or was it?


a) Math
b) Science
c) English
d) Homework is below me
e) Make your little brother do it
f) Hang out with your lil bro
g) Ditch the house and go to a friends.

Edit: No one post a part until I say have to leave. I made the thread, I want to be the first author dammit!
option e, grade 7 is easy as balls, and even if little brother gets it all wrong its only grade 7, it doesnt matter at all.
D for redh0tchilip3pp..
EDIT: I read your edit, TS. eh....i'll go with G

Simply because I could breed the pokemon, and act out my sick sexual fantasies between Dittos and Chanseys.

Quote by bequickorbedead
She had sex..with my...AIDS?
Quote by strat335
if we had a zombie story, i'd probably piss myself from excitement. i want one!

A guy started one, he disappeared right when it was getting decent.
you guys probably just got us grounded.

Now where are we going to use those condoms??
G Wins


Why the hell do I have to conform to their rules anyway? This is bull****, I'm going to Mikes.

You quickly stuff your homework into your backpack and head out the back door, hiding your backpack where your mom won't find it. You jump on your bicycle and ride south to Mike's house. Mike was one of your "cool" friends. He claims to have done every drug known to man AND ANIMAL, in his basement with his older brother. He lost his virignity at the age of ten to a woman known as 'Chocolicious'. You always wondered what it was like in his basement but had never seen it.

While riding you see a gang of chicks, including the one and only Krissy Pohl. Ohh man, she was in a shirt skirt too. You see Chuck Ranger put his hand on her shoulder. She's going out with him?!

What to do?


a) Continue to Mike's house
b) Talk with Krissy anyways, and risk getting your ass kicked
c) Go for one of Krissy's less-hot friends
d) Try to sneak a peek under her skirt and then continue to Mike's
e) Challenge Chuck to a fight