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Today i just got 3 detentions for eating a banana in study hall. I was told there was no eating about a week ago from the teacher, but everyday i eat. Today randomly as i am chomping down on a banana he just tells me to get up and sends me to my dean.

just wondering if you have any other stories like this
I asked my world geography teacher if we could have food, he then said umm small things, perhaps nothing bigger then popcorn. I then asked if we could bring cheeseburgers, and he said yes. I then feasted on McDonalds.
Matthew 7:7 ""Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you."

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the worst part about it was aparrantly a couple days ago someone threw a banana peel. They already gave him detentions and i think the teacher thinks i was suppling him. Dont they know that bananas are mass produced and by chance someone might have also brought a banana!!!
In the cafeteria I got up to let my friend sit down after he got his food after the dean said no more getting up for food. I got ISD.
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Sir, I love you.

"Disrupting class" -- I dropped my pen and it rolled so I got up to get it, teacher yells, detention
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CFH82, I love you. I didn't laugh, but my god, I love you.

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Holy shit, that was epic. A mighty roar escapeth'd my mouth.

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I saw a penis.
Got a detention because my teacher thought I called her fat and sassy. I was talking about the rejected cartoons with my friends, but she thought I was talking about her.
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I love getting hit in the balls.

Sometimes, I masturbate while imagining my girlfriend is ramming her knee up into my precious orbs. It turns me on so much.

Actually, that's not true. I don't have a girlfriend
in grade 5 my best friend got a detention for sitting cross-legged

“If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that quite often it still wasn't as cynical as real life.”
― Terry Pratchett


Jeremy Clarkson is a knob.
I got a detention for doing something I shouldn't have been doing.

My style is impetuous.
My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious.
I want your heart.
I want to eat your children.

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I got an ISS in metals shop when we had a substitute for telling him to wear safety glasses.

It was apparently considered "being disrespectful" for me to advise him to wear safety glasses before showing someone how to weld...
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This is the funniest thing i've ever read on UG.
lespaulrocks39, you sir are awesome.
Letting loose a deep loud mofo of a fart that made the seat vibrate so much it felt erotic in the middle of a year 9 assembly. Funniest day of my life.
i remember in primary school i had just got out of a detention for fighting some kid, and as i was walking to my bag i got another one for not having a hat.
Quote by ralph wiggum
i remember in primary school i had just got out of a detention for fighting some kid, and as i was walking to my bag i got another one for not having a hat.

Oh man, I remember in middle school when two kids got in a fight. When one was leaving the office, he headbutted the first person he came across in the halls.
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Quote by emagdnimasisiht
This is the funniest thing i've ever read on UG.
lespaulrocks39, you sir are awesome.
My friends once got a detention because they went up to this uptight Asian kid and started saying "What, what, what's in the butt?" Yeah, he told on them to the principal.
If only summer rain would fall, on the houses and the boulevards
And the sidewalk bagatelles, it's like a dream
With the roar of cars and the lulling of the cafe bars,
The sweetly sleeping sweeping of the Seine...
I was throwing raisins (at people ) in the gym after lunch.

What's the harm in that?
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start with more poppy music with occasional screams and then work your way into emoish crap like a day to remember and so on.
i pulled a quarter out of my teacher's ear.

he's not too big on magic tricks.

EDIT: oh yeah, i also got in trouble today for saying the word "jew". the teacher was like "jake i told you we don't use that language in here!" and i was like "wtf that's what they're called" and he just said "if you keep using that derogatory language i'm going to have to send you up to the office". so i said it again and he was like "if you don't shut your mouth right now i'm sending everyone to the office". i was like wtf.... it was funny though.
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Last edited by Jacob6293 at Apr 10, 2008,
there was a sub in my class and when she talked to me i started saying things like i will do that right meow"

i have no regrets
Quote by ralph wiggum
i remember in primary school i had just got out of a detention for fighting some kid, and as i was walking to my bag i got another one for not having a hat.

What does that have to do with it oh and I got one because one of my friends told my teacher she had big hips and I started laughing I had to do the big six with my coach and go to ISS while my friend who said it got nothing
jerking off in the bathroom once the teacher just walked in on me and he was like "DETENTION!" and i was like "OVERRULED!" and came on his slacks.
One time, I had missed a few days as my pottery class was finishing a project, so I was finishing the last one while everyone else was starting the next one as a result. So, after I get done with the project, it couldn't have been more than five minutes before the teacher came over and started yelling at me because I wasn't working. Now, he should no as an art teacher, that you have to think about art... you don't just do it. Also, I did have my pencil in hand (we had to draw the projects before we made them) thinking about it as he came over. So anyways, he starts yelling at me that I have however many seconds to start writing before I got a detention. I just gave him my "are you ****ing stupid?" look, as he counted down and gave me a detention. When he said I had a detention I put my pencil down and refused to work while he was standing there screaming over my shoulder. In the end he counts me down 7 detentions, none of which I go to, and he reports it to the office who just gives me 1 detention as opposed to his 7, which I still didn't go to. Seems the principal agreed with me that he was being stupid since I never got punished for not going to the administrative detention.
I once got suspended for gutting this kid I didn't like and hanging his disemboweled carcass from a meat hook in the cafeteria. Goddamn fascist school officials.
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One day we all had to go to certain rooms to recieve our MEAP and EXPLORE scores (standardized tests) and a friend of mine was in this one room with a stupid teacher. The final bell had rung and she was wasting time talking to someone, so my friend politely asked for his papers so he could get to his bus on time. She flipped out and made him wait after... His brother was there with and said he's gonna wait just in case his bro needs a ride, and the teacher flipped out even more and sent them to the principal.
She's done a ton of stupid **** like that before too... I spent 4 days in a class of hers and transfered out XD
today my friend got suspended for taking a dump in one of the vending machines and doing donuts on the basketball court with a truck.
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Quote by BigChief84
What does that have to do with it

because it was a school rule to have hats during lunch break (common practice in primary schools). i was going to my bag to get it cuz i had a detention, and a teacher gave me another detention. i think this was about grade 7, so 4 years ago.
Wow my school doesn't even allow hats no matter what period it is or if you are outside but I'm a rebel so I do it anyway and one time aI got lunch detention seeing as we dont have regular detention
Last edited by BigChief84 at Apr 10, 2008,
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mine doesnt even allow hoods up

I'd be shocked if someone told me there school did allow them.
I sharpened my f-ing pencil during a test and got 2 detentions. I had my parents call the teacher and she made something up about how I was passing out answers. I got a 64 on that test, but people wanted MY answers... right...
Talking during a drug propaganda movie. This substitute was like "Go to ISS!" so I went, but there was only five minutes left in class so nothing really happened, the bell rang before I got there.
There ain't no moral to this story at all. Anything I tell you very well could be a lie.
i got a DT for saying you dropped your pocket :P:P

it was funny cuz he looked
98% of people have read that stupid 98% teens and alcohol sig, put this in your sig if you like getting hammered.

Thats it.
i once got a detention because one oif my friend fell down i went over to check if he was okay and a teacher thought i was kicking him and i was like WTF!!!

i got suspended for three days by my health teacher for not having a paper......and there was 7 other ppl who didnt have so i was like major WTF!!!

BTW my health teacher also used to be a stripper at chip and dales. Ironic?
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Nah i love the feeling of poo coming out. Its like being reverse ass ****ed.

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Lets teach them the meaning of CROTCH VIOLENCE!!!


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