Poll: Do you bust a deuce when ur out?
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View poll results: Do you bust a deuce when ur out?
Yes, only in a nice clean toilet. I allow my butt cheeks to touch the rim.
36 38%
Yes, but only in a nice clean toilet, cheeks do not touch rim
18 19%
Not in any toilet but i would crap in a pub/bar/club toilet.
19 20%
I will snap a rod off anywhere
23 24%
Voters: 96.
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#1
Well, we are having a poo themed day.

Do you poo wen ur out? I really try to aim not to have a shit when im out, especially in sketchy little toilets... But i know people who will snap off a meaty length in a cess ridden hole in the floor.

Quote by Darth_Qurashi
Man it feels just like anal sex, I think; I'm still a virgin

Quote by nebiru
Goose is my Hero.

Quote by Xeus
Yeah, if you get the shag in before she's your legal sister the incest is over turned
#3
**** ****ting in public. I don't want my ass and balls rubbing on a place where another dudes ass and balls have rubbed.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#4
Quote by nebiru
**** ****ting in public. I don't want my ass and balls rubbing on a place where another dudes ass and balls have rubbed.

I don't know about you, but I don't rub my balls on toilet seats. Ever.
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#5
Quote by nebiru
**** ****ting in public. I don't want my ass and balls rubbing on a place where another dudes ass and balls have rubbed.


Afraid youll turn gayzorz?
I've been here since '04.

#6
It's more a home thing
Why can’t a heterosexual guy tell a heterosexual guy that he thinks his booty is fly?

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#8
Quote by Sid McCall
I don't know about you, but I don't rub my balls on toilet seats. Ever.


I do...

everytime I go into a public toilet I take a ****, then I rubb some vaseline on my buttcheacks and leave a nice print on the wall.
#9
Quote by Sid McCall
I don't know about you, but I don't rub my balls on toilet seats. Ever.



Haha, I don't rub them on there... but sometimes my junk will swing and hit the toilet and ****.

And no I am not afraid I will turn gay.. I just don't know what the hell the dude before may have had.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#10
I usually **** only at home, i have been known to postpone an evening out if i was worried that i may need a **** when im out. I never want to have a **** in a club/bar toilet. EVER.
Quote by Darth_Qurashi
Man it feels just like anal sex, I think; I'm still a virgin

Quote by nebiru
Goose is my Hero.

Quote by Xeus
Yeah, if you get the shag in before she's your legal sister the incest is over turned
#11
I was having a dump in JFK airport the other week and the cleaner guy started sweeping my cubicle out from under the gaps at the bottom of the walls. That was really offputting.
ABBA
#12
Quote by nebiru
**** ****ting in public. I don't want my ass and balls rubbing on a place where another dudes ass and balls have rubbed.


So no one else has ever sat on your toilet?
What a sad and lonely life you must lead.
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#13
if i need to sh|t i sh|t.

i layer up on a TP protective shield...

a papered padding for the pooping.
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#14
Quote by PullTigerTail
So no one else has ever sat on your toilet?
What a sad and lonely life you must lead.


I have an upstairs toilet where me and my girlfriend **** and everyone else ****s on the downstairs toilet.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#15
I only go if i absoloutley need to and there is no alternative, i make sure to put paper around the rim though.
WHOMP

Think of that next time you are not allowed to laugh.
#16
Quote by Early Cuyler
i layer up on a TP protective shield...

Thus making the seat sanitary and infinitely more comfortable.
#17
I usually just take a dump in the middle of the sidewalk or the floor of whatever building I'm in, saves a lot of time.
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#18
I had to take a **** in a wetherspoons (****ty pub franchise) in the UK a while back. I was going to watch Frank Black live, and i really didnt want to see him with a full payload .

It was the grimmest experience ever, someone had written 'rape' on the wall in feces right next to the loo roll dispenser. To make it worse, i had a runny shit, a big time wiper. I ran out of wipe and had to do a short naked jog to the adjecent cubicle.

bad times
Quote by Darth_Qurashi
Man it feels just like anal sex, I think; I'm still a virgin

Quote by nebiru
Goose is my Hero.

Quote by Xeus
Yeah, if you get the shag in before she's your legal sister the incest is over turned
#20
Quote by GooseMcShred
I had to take a **** in a wetherspoons (****ty pub franchise) in the UK a while back. I was going to watch Frank Black live, and i really didnt want to see him with a full payload .

It was the grimmest experience ever, someone had written 'rape' on the wall in feces right next to the loo roll dispenser. To make it worse, i had a runny shit, a big time wiper. I ran out of wipe and had to do a short naked jog to the adjecent cubicle.

bad times



Hahahahaha, I would have left. I luckily have never had to **** in a bar or pub. I would leave and go somewhere else. The toilets in the bars around here look like cess pools. There is always **** and piss and vomit everywhere. You have to stand in a puddle of it just to piss.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#21
Thanks, at the time i was ready to cry.

Hopefully, never again.
Quote by Darth_Qurashi
Man it feels just like anal sex, I think; I'm still a virgin

Quote by nebiru
Goose is my Hero.

Quote by Xeus
Yeah, if you get the shag in before she's your legal sister the incest is over turned
#22
Quote by GooseMcShred
I had to take a **** in a wetherspoons (****ty pub franchise) in the UK a while back. I was going to watch Frank Black live, and i really didnt want to see him with a full payload .

It was the grimmest experience ever, someone had written 'rape' on the wall in feces right next to the loo roll dispenser. To make it worse, i had a runny shit, a big time wiper. I ran out of wipe and had to do a short naked jog to the adjecent cubicle.

bad times


You sir, are my new hero.

I tend to shit when i have to. Except in clubs or festivals
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#23
Quote by nebiru
everyone else ****s on the downstairs toilet.


that could get a bit messy.....
#24
i had to crap outside at a festival once... that was pretty much the worst experience ever.

crapping outside is no fun

especially when you only have 3 tissues as a toilet paper substitute
#25
I had to take a dump in my woods the other day.. It's quite a task to not piss in your trousers too..
#27
i forgot. lolz

why did you have to **** in the woods?
Quote by Darth_Qurashi
Man it feels just like anal sex, I think; I'm still a virgin

Quote by nebiru
Goose is my Hero.

Quote by Xeus
Yeah, if you get the shag in before she's your legal sister the incest is over turned
#28
"I will snap a rod off anywhere" made me laugh so hard that I had to vote for it even if it's not true.
#29
lol. its only 2 hours now till i got for my pre-emptive shit before i go out drinking lol
#30
Only if i have to go really bad. And i usually do it in school or at malls cause that's where the public toilets are the cleanest.
"When I grow up, I wanna be a vampire bat"

#31
Bringing an old thread back here, but its a good one and its not insaneley old.

This one time when i was in amsterdam with my college, i had stored this **** up for about 3 or 4 days, that is a ****ing achievement going by the amount i was drinking, and the night i got stoned i got some ****ing heavy chinese to calm the munchies (booze and chinese are notorious **** stirrers). But, one night, me and a few friends were at a bar, and i was sitting by the pool table with this girl i liked and some other friends, and anyway, she was feeling kinda nervous as there were some shady characters in there and so i was a gentleman about it, and plus she didn't know many of the other people who were with us too well.

All was good for an hour or so, then i felt it coming, the urge hit me like a freight train, i had a sinking feeling in my heart, because

a-i was enjoying myself
b-i didn't want to leave my friend on her own
c-the bar toilets were not too great and there was a dude outside asking for 50 cents from anyone who came out
d-the hotel was a good 10 minute walk.

Now, considering i was kinda drunk, i didn't particularly want to walk back as i may have got lost and plus i may have to **** on the way, but then again, the toilets in the bar were horrible, so i just went eye of the tiger mode, i told my friends i would be back in a minute. I got out of the bar, walked down the street, across the square and across the bridge, i saw a few of my friends on the way to the bar and they asked where i was going, i just replied "i gotta take care of something back at the hotel", at this point i was power walking, i didn't want to run because in my half drunk state that makes for less bowel control.

After about 5-10 minutes of walking i was almost at the hotel, all down our street were food shops, which didn't really help, plus i saw some other people i knew who started asking me for smokes, and in the end i gave a few out just to get them to **** off and leave me alone. I got to the hotel, luckily our room was on the ground floor, so i walked in, locked to door, put the TP pad on the seat and unleased on that ****er.

I left the hotel feeling a stone lighter, and when i got back to the bar, the girl i left ran up and hugged me, i didn't know why, but it turns out some dude from amsterdam wanted to use her as a wager in a game of pool.
WHOMP

Think of that next time you are not allowed to laugh.
#32
i try and usually hold it in

ESPEICALLY if im on a plane

but sometimes the plane flight is just too long
BEAT IT, BUT NOT IN FRONT OF CHILDREN YOU DIRTY C***!-Mel Gimpsuit
Last edited by XCount Me InX at Apr 22, 2008,
#33
Where is the answer for "No, not under any circumstances, even on holiday I wait two weeks without ****ting"?
#35
Quote by XCount Me InX
i try and usually hold it in

ESPEICALLY if im on a plane

but sometimes the plane flight is just too long

*link*

thought it was appropriate

It's not. I'd take that link down, if I were you.
#36
Yeah, it's kind of like an accomplishment thing. Like taking a dump in another state. It's only if the bathrooms are clean though.
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#37
I usually try not to go to the bathroom in public restrooms cause first of all their really dirty and second of all nothings worse than having the craps and trying to keep all your farts and stuff quiet so other people hopefully wont hear.
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#38
hey if you gotta go you gotta go

if i go to clean toilets i still use toilet paper to cover the seat, dirty toilets i just hover around the seat
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