michal23
=D
Join date: Jan 2007
3,221 IQ
#1
Hey guys, this is a song I wrote influenced by bands like Iron Maiden and Judas Priest, but also the likes of Metallica. Anyway check it out and C4C
Attachments:
songidea2.zip
alexruimy
███
Join date: Jan 2008
374 IQ
#2
Wow really does sound a lot like Metallica. I love it. I'd love to hear a vocal line too. Perhaps track 2, slightly modified? Love the voicing of your E2 btw.
michal23
=D
Join date: Jan 2007
3,221 IQ
#3
Quote by alexruimy
Wow really does sound a lot like Metallica. I love it. I'd love to hear a vocal line too. Perhaps track 2, slightly modified? Love the voicing of your E2 btw.


Awesome, thanks very much dude; how would you suggest I should modify track 2?
Travlembo
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2008
47 IQ
#4
It might sound too much like Metallica... It was cool but it sort of lacked progression to me... the solo was impressive though, and if you can play that, I give you props
alexruimy
███
Join date: Jan 2008
374 IQ
#5
assuming you want to make it a vocal line, just mod it to make it more singable...longer notes, shorter range a bit. try singing la's to the line as you play it and if anything's uncomfortable, go from there.
michal23
=D
Join date: Jan 2007
3,221 IQ
#6
Quote by alexruimy
assuming you want to make it a vocal line, just mod it to make it more singable...longer notes, shorter range a bit. try singing la's to the line as you play it and if anything's uncomfortable, go from there.


Hmm I was actually hoping to use it as a lead guitar to compliment the singing melody, so to kind of have both at the same time (other than in the intro, where it is pretty much an intro solo =]) but I haven't really developed the singing melody as I don't really have any lyrics to work on at the moment
~DrEaM ThEaTeR~
Registered User
Join date: Jul 2006
726 IQ
#7
the intro solo was fantastic

your first verse, starting at bar 22, seems like it is building up alot, and when it hits the chorus seems too loose some of that energy. maybe put something a prechorus part in or something along those lines

i really liked bar 38 in your solo, that just seemed perfect

overall a pretty good song, just perhaps needs a bit more length to it?
MarchOfEternity
Registered User
Join date: Apr 2008
636 IQ
#8
Wow, this really sounds a lot like Metallica, a bit too similar, perhaps. But overall, it's a cool song, reminds me of 'Tallica's slower songs. The solo is amazing, and the song is just right. I probably wouldn't change anything, save for the drum, because I think it could be improved.

Anyway, for the vocal, I think it would be cooler if you stick with what you originally planned to do. Use the lead guitar to play in harmony with the vocal, with the vocal singing a simplified line from the lead guitar. Oh, and imo it would be better if it had two chorus as it ends a little bit too quick, well, to me, at least. But, yeah, you have a really sweet song there .

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=831174
tborsje
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2006
146 IQ
#9
Hey man,

Nice song. Does sound kinda like Maiden.

The clean bit at the start was nice, but I think it'd sound better playing different chords. It'd sound really effective if it was simply just Em to Bm without the sus2, and keeping the solo to this progression. And instead of doing those bends at bars 9 and 13 I think it'd be better to just hold an E.

I'll attach your song the way I would've done it. (Hope you don't mind my changing your creation lol ) I'm just putting it as a suggestion, this way it is a more 'basic' melody I feel.

The verse was great, nothing to complain about at all. The chorus riff could be changed a bit like the intro solo aswell.

The solo was really great aswell. It'd be nice to end on a chord in the outro.

All in all this is a good song, it just IMO needs a few little changes and maybe some more length.

C4C? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=13773389

Now that I look at it, your song's a bit like mine in structure, give it a listen
Attachments:
songidea2.zip
michal23
=D
Join date: Jan 2007
3,221 IQ
#10
^ Cheers dude, I've saved your changes as a seperate file, so that me and my band can decide on which bits to change and which bits to keep =]. Off to crit yours now
Broadsword
The Wild Rover
Join date: Mar 2006
2,548 IQ
#11
Hey, neatsong, I'll hop on the train as well and say it does sound like 'tallica.

The clean intro was cool, as was the intro lead, but for me it was kind of boring. I myself would have preferred at least one fast part in the solo before finishing. The transition from the intro to the verse, concerning the drums, confuses me. The drums build up, then just drop, only to reappear the next bar. It was a total mood killer.

The verse was good, but repetetive. The transition from verse to chorus was, once again, shaky at best. It was too sudden. And the chorus itself didn't feel like a chorus, but more like an interlude. To be honest, I was expecting something big and explosive for a chorus.

The second solo was okay, some parts were a bit dissonant for my taste.

One thing I noticed was that this song really lacked any sort of progression. There was just one intro, one verse, and one chorus. In my opinion, pretty much nothing was accomplished. This song could be miles better, though, if you through in an interlude with another batch of verse+chorus.

On the whole, this song feels more like it would serve as a filler rather than a good, solid, song.
I would give this a 7.5/10.
kiki94bass
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2007
151 IQ
#14
Dude I love it! it's pretty cool and I admire you because my song needs a solo too but I just can't write it, but your solo is GREAT!!!

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My song (GP5,GP4,MIDI)
Last edited by kiki94bass at Apr 15, 2008,
Local666Union
i hate my username
Join date: Feb 2007
550 IQ
#15
Yes, this reminds 'tallica lot(The Unforgiven anyone?).
Very good intro solo, the main solo is too long IMO and the drums can be improved.
Overall, very good song. 9/10
spartan 118
Aspiring Jack of All Trad
Join date: Aug 2006
1,150 IQ
#16
Well, looking at your song, I can say with confidence that the intro solo is very amazing. I have no complaints there.
When the song got to the verse riff, it had me smiling because I think it is a very catchy riff. It gets a tiny bit repetetive though, come the end of the song.
The chorus riff: I thought it was pretty good, but it is kind of anti-climactic (sp?). The verse riff is sort of exciting and then it gets to... this. I admire the clean riff in the background though.
When I reached the solo, to be honest I wasn't expecting much. Of course, my expectations were far exceeded within the first few notes. It is everything a solo should be (to me, anyway) and it fits the song perfectly, except for bar 39 (It sounds sort of out of place).
Overall, I liked your piece. It was just a bit short though.

Crit mine, please? http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=838465

118
It all makes sense
We're capable of beauty
Through sounds that make on cringe
The dogs only hear us now