Poll: Which way do you wipe your ass?
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View poll results: Which way do you wipe your ass?
Gouche to crack direction
55 66%
Crack to gouche direction
28 34%
Voters: 83.
#1
Hello pit, I have a discussion topic for you. I recently began wondering, when I wipe my ass, do I wipe in the gouche to crack direction, or in the crack to gouche direction. I can`t recall what I do when it comes down to it, its just so natural, like breathing or blinking. I`m just wondering what the majority of you do?
#4
Girls have to wipe from gouche to crack, men dont have to worry about it. If women wipe towards their bits and even get a small amount of poo in them, it can get infected and thats no good. Woman are always tought from a young age to wipe a certain way. Or at least thats how my wife explained it when we potty-trianed my daughter.
#5
for me its:
- grab paper
- start at bottom (i assume that's the gouche) and with one fluid motion go up crack
- visually check paper for amount of stainage
- if amount of stainage is above acceptable, repeat process
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#6
Quote by RageAgnstUrJaw
for me its:
- grab paper
- start at bottom (i assume that's the gouche) and with one fluid motion go up crack
- visually check paper for amount of stainage
- if amount of stainage is above acceptable, repeat process



Exactly what he said.
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#7
Quote by RageAgnstUrJaw
for me its:
- grab paper
- start at bottom (i assume that's the gouche) and with one fluid motion go up crack
- visually check paper for amount of stainage
- if amount of stainage is above acceptable, repeat process



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LET'S GO BUCKS
#8
Both.
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#11
Quote by hippieboy444
what if you alternate pick your ass?


That's just weird. I mean why would you stick a guitar pick up your ass?
#13
Start from the upper side, you know, next to the balls, and then go down to the middle.
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#15
Quote by Masamune
Is that the proper way to spell it? I've always thought it was gooch.


I don`t think there is a proper way to spell gouche, or gooch
#16
Quote by verdilak
Wow... what an...interesting topic for a guitar board...

You've obviously never been in the Pit.
#18
Quote by RageAgnstUrJaw
for me its:
- grab paper
- start at bottom (i assume that's the gouche) and with one fluid motion go up crack
- visually check paper for amount of stainage
- if amount of stainage is above acceptable, repeat process


EXACTLY!!
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#19
Quote by verdilak
Wow... what an...interesting topic for a guitar board...


Welcome to the Pit
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#21
Quote by FireandFlames
Wiping isn't enough for me... I have to use The Saddle instead...



something tells me that toilet paper roll can be interchanged with a dildo......
time machine. Inadvertently, I had created a
#22
Quote by SixString1989
Girls have to wipe from gouche to crack, men dont have to worry about it. If women wipe towards their bits and even get a small amount of poo in them, it can get infected and thats no good. Woman are always tought from a young age to wipe a certain way. Or at least thats how my wife explained it when we potty-trianed my daughter.




Wow, a serious answer!

I did not know that...
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#23
Quote by iceman_8319
something tells me that toilet paper roll can be interchanged with a dildo......

YAY I got sigged
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#24
Quote by hippieboy444
what if you alternate pick your ass?


Quote by Scutchington
I like this guy, he's UG's Greek, and he just told your ass in two paragraphs. And I once spent 5 minutes watching his avatar.


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#25
I go gooch-to-crack because the ass cheeks form a more natural curve, so I don't get sh*t all up in my balls. Crack-to-gooch is a dead end street. You'd be squishing it all in one place. G2C is the way to be.

And if you start at the gooch you get more momentum going. C2G is like going to jump the Grand Canyon and you start from the ramp.
Last edited by lounge act at Apr 13, 2008,
#26
Quote by FireandFlames
Wiping isn't enough for me... I have to use The Saddle instead...



nice guitars
Quote by Scutchington
I like this guy, he's UG's Greek, and he just told your ass in two paragraphs. And I once spent 5 minutes watching his avatar.


A Brain Malfunction

We'll Never Admit As Defeat
#27
i like to keep all residue (that i'm bound to miss when wiping with a bone-dry piece of toilet paper) as far away from my genitalia as possible. however, if there's a little too much left hanging when i'm done going, I might have to kind of wipe in both directions to keep everything that is left over from each wipe in the general "anus region," so I'm not like pushing extra poo up my ass crack and stuff. Hell, sometimes I get SUCH a bad wiping situation that I end up just wiping as good as I can and then hopping in the shower to clean my ass out.

those toilet seats that clean with water seem like a dream come true.
#29
crack to gouche, that way you can use the natural "come here" motion of your finger to make sure all the turd is wiped away.
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#30
I'm seeing crack to gouche and vice versa but you left out the blotting option...you know when you have such a messy, runny **** that if you wipe it will just smear onto your asscheeks or make a bigger mess? Blotting usually is a necessity after indian or mexican food.
#31
Quote by RageAgnstUrJaw
for me its:
- grab paper
- start at bottom (i assume that's the gouche) and with one fluid motion go up crack
- visually check paper for amount of stainage
- if amount of stainage is above acceptable, repeat process

Omg i cant stop laughing. Sigged.

^
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#32
I go from the gouche I guess it would be a dragging direction because if you go in the other direction you could not be paying attention and Go to fast or slip and get **** on your balls or something and no one wants ****ty balls
#33
i go down inbetween my legs (ive been told this is odd?) and i go in a pulling motion, forward. crack to hole.
Jesus wouldn't give you the sweat off of his balls if you were dying of thirst.
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#34
Quote by verdilak
Wow... what an...interesting topic for a guitar board...

Saddest part is that this HAS been done before.

And for me it's gooch to crack. It just feels more natural.
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and my mom then told me to masturbate more.

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Quote by The Leader
Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do more look like?
#35
Quote by FireandFlames
Wiping isn't enough for me... I have to use The Saddle instead...



I'm intrigued....

Explain how this "Saddle" works.....
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools