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#1
Every town in the world has that "special somebody". That somebody is the person everybody from the town recognises from afar, but "outsiders" have no idea. That person is often legendary. There will be stories of him/her, true or not, nobody ever really knows.

So come on everybody! Post your towns most infamous resident!

My hometown has Rudy. The fact he is on the 'net amazes me, but, well, he wanted to be there!

Last edited by saphrax at Apr 18, 2008,
#2
we have this guy named wally. he lost his license so he drives around town on his moped. he goes like 30mph even on major roads where its like 55mph. it pisses everyone off but he doesnt care. you can always see him riding with a big ole cigar in his mouth.
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#3
We have KING LOVE!

He is now dead... but all you have to do is Google him and you will find all sorts of ****. He is a local legend.. he even has a myspace haha.



EDIT: We also had an idiot that would dress up as Superman, Batman, Blackbeard the pirate and various other things and jog around town.. I found some **** on the net for him but not any really good photos.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
Last edited by nebiru at Apr 18, 2008,
#4
Stace Smith owns most of the ranches around here. Everyone knows who you're talking about when you say "Stace." Wow, I'm such a country girl.
[ takes ][ makes ][ he's ] your fuck[ be strong ][ hate ] maroon 5. It's [[ fucking ]] pantera.
#5
Barry Austin



Edit : the 40p man he asks you for 40p or the time and then mugs you.
Last edited by josh999x at Apr 18, 2008,
#6
We have Duvet Dave, he's a tramp that only has a duvet...
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#8
No one. In my town we have a couple of drug addicts, Heroin Sally (but she died a few months ago) and Rich, who tells you his life story in exchange for a bottle of White Lightning, but they're nothing special.
The will to neither strive nor cry,
The power to feel with others give.
Calm, calm me more; nor let me die
Before I have begun to live.

-Matthew Arnold

Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
#9
We have Congressman Ledeuk. He thinks he's a congressman. I think he's an old war vet but he's got so many drugs in him he doesn't know what he's ever saying. He's got pictures on his walls of him in his house on the phone with the president. He also says the chinese government owes him billions. There's so much more he's told us. He comes into my parents store every so often but he hasn't been in like, 2 months, he might have been busted for drugs.
BRIGHT LIGHTS PUT ME IN A TRANCE.
but it aint house music that makes me want to dance.
#10
A guy named "Snusk arne" who tries to pay little girls to have sex with him. For some reason he hasn't been arrested...

I was out biking with a girl once when I was younger, and we stopped outside his window to eat some candy. He pointed at the girl and did that gesture where you form a circle with your thumb and pointing finger, then thrust your other pointing finger through it. Yeah he wanted to sex her.

He showed a $50 and I was like "Come on, easy money!" but it turns out girls aren't tramps.
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#11
The local infamous law enforcerment member Bill.

He shot a kid recently because he had a knife in his hand. He will pull you over and give you a ticket for no real crime. He'll break apart concerts at local venues because they "don't have a permit" He pulled my friend and I over earlier this week and made my friend cut his hair or he would be arrested for "Sexual harrasment"

One time in my town's monthly art festival I was playing my acoustic and he told me I needed a permit, I told him to **** off and that it was the town art festival. He said guitar wasn't a real art form, then spit next to me.

Yeah I hate him and he hates "Rock N' Roll Punks"
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#12
Gene Rattery was a legend.

Died a couple years back
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#13
We have Jake Mangelwurzel, utter legend. He proclaims himself to be the King of Yorkshire, makes furniture out of scrap metal and wood, apparantly tried to marry his and when a helmet law came in for bikes he tried to change his religion to Sikh so he didn't have to wear a turban.

Oh, and this is an excerpt from a biography of a local judge from a website:

Quote by Local Judge
Huddersfield eccentric Jake Mangelwurzel was appealing a conviction for impersonating a police officer and turned up at court in a full jester's outfit complete with bells on his hat.

After 15 minutes in front of Judge Baker without a comment on his appearance he was driven to say to the judge: "Your honour I thought you might be wondering why I am dressed like this."

"No," said the judge with his usual composure.

"It's because I'm the town clown of Huddersfield," the appellant insisted on telling him. "Think no more about it Mr Mangelwurzel, look what they made me wear," was the droll reply.
Funny words.
#14
We have a guy called Ronnie Turner, better known locally as Swazzy. He used to be a copper in the 70's and early 80's round here, real bastard my grandad told me. Somehow he lost both of his legs and now he rides around on the roads in a wheelchair wearing the same clothes all the time, handlebar moustache. Everybody knows him round here, he does a lot of charity work now. Pretty good bloke, ive spoke to him a few times... Cant find a pic of him anywhere...
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lololololol that was epic andyd93. you just made my day


PROUD EVERTONIAN
#15

We have Robert, "The Umbrella Man".
"A local Santa Cruz feature, each day, once in the morning and once in the evening, Umbrella Man dons his pink attire and aluminum-foil-lined umbrella and very verrrrry slowly walks up and down the length of the Pacific Avenue Mall. Zen trickster, hapless kook, or just another annoying attention-seeker? You make the call. Come, experience... Umbrella Man. "

(Paragraph wasn't written by me)
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Last edited by Human Contact at Apr 18, 2008,
#16
Quote by josh999x
Barry Austin


55st Barry from ZOO!!!
Quote by Atomic_Assault
lololololol that was epic andyd93. you just made my day


PROUD EVERTONIAN
#18
Quote by Silent_Jester13
The local infamous law enforcerment member Bill.

He shot a kid recently because he had a knife in his hand. He will pull you over and give you a ticket for no real crime. He'll break apart concerts at local venues because they "don't have a permit" He pulled my friend and I over earlier this week and made my friend cut his hair or he would be arrested for "Sexual harrasment"

One time in my town's monthly art festival I was playing my acoustic and he told me I needed a permit, I told him to **** off and that it was the town art festival. He said guitar wasn't a real art form, then spit next to me.

Yeah I hate him and he hates "Rock N' Roll Punks"


You live in the 50's right?
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or maybe he has an opinion *GASP*
#19
We also have this large angry black man that rides around on a ****ty bike and beats the **** out of everyone and steals their jewelry.

None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.
#20
We have "The Bag Lady", whose real name is Chandar Vora. She was born here, became a professor in India, then when she came back, had a mental breakdown. She lives in a awful-looking house and collects trash and plastic bags. She is very smart; when the city tried to cut off her electricity she constructed solar panels...
My all gold grills give her cold chills
Said she gotta coke feel cuz I'm sooo trill.
#21
There's loads. There was a montage of them on youtube and even a site dedicated to them but the authorities took it down because they said it was 'offensive'.
#24
Our town of 5,000 people in the boonies has a few popular people...

There was a rich old lady named Rose who owned our town's telephone company. She sold it to a major corp. and gave half the money (like $300,000) to our school.

Mr. Jeff Turpin practically owns half the town, as his personal lumbermill in his backyard supplies most of the wood for houses built here. He carves fantastic art (bears, eagles, etc)out of the stumps of trees that he takes out. He also helps out with the boyscouts, has a quarter of a mile long Zipline that goes across the canyon, and builds pumpkin-chuckin' machines.

hah. Awesome guy.
Theres more but yall dont care =)
"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
#25
We also have Purple Aki:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purple_Aki
Hes really weird. He got arrested a while back for attacking a man and forcing him to show him his muscles while he jacked off, got put in prison for assault and public indecency.
EDIT: Beaten to it by The Overlord^^^

And we have the Heswall Tranny: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-K7EM--ino&feature=related
The guy has a wife and kids... He also has a chin like Desperate Dan, but thats not the point He wears a ****load of make-up and rides a bike around the Wirral with a sweaty back x) Should see it... Very strange bloke, but whatever makes him happy lol.

But around Liverpool (and many other British cities) we have Spring-Heeled Jack: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Springheel_jack . He was said to jump from roof to roof on all the houses... The story was going on when my grandparents were kids, still goes on occasionally now...
Quote by Atomic_Assault
lololololol that was epic andyd93. you just made my day


PROUD EVERTONIAN
#27


Dunno his name, but everyone knows him. We also have 'messy James' who is a simple lad in his 20's who smokes weed and hangs out with 15 year olds. And we have 'tony' who rides round in his wheelchair talking to everyone!
TRANSFORMICE






#28
Quote by Kensai
A guy named "Snusk arne" who tries to pay little girls to have sex with him. For some reason he hasn't been arrested...

I was out biking with a girl once when I was younger, and we stopped outside his window to eat some candy. He pointed at the girl and did that gesture where you form a circle with your thumb and pointing finger, then thrust your other pointing finger through it. Yeah he wanted to sex her.

He showed a $50 and I was like "Come on, easy money!" but it turns out girls aren't tramps.

Uhhhh dude. I was pointing at you.
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#29
Quote by Jackal58
Uhhhh dude. I was pointing at you.


Whaat? I could've made an easy $50
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#30
cant find a picture but we have a drunken hobo who wears a builders jacket and walks between stirling and falkirk, buying countless bottles of white lightning on the way :P

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/ )' a a `( \
( ( ,---. ) )
THIS WAS MEANT TO BE A PIG
\ `(_o_o_)' /
\ `-' /
| |---| |
[_] [_]
#31
Quote by Silent_Jester13
The local infamous law enforcerment member Bill.

He shot a kid recently because he had a knife in his hand. He will pull you over and give you a ticket for no real crime. He'll break apart concerts at local venues because they "don't have a permit" He pulled my friend and I over earlier this week and made my friend cut his hair or he would be arrested for "Sexual harrasment"

One time in my town's monthly art festival I was playing my acoustic and he told me I needed a permit, I told him to **** off and that it was the town art festival. He said guitar wasn't a real art form, then spit next to me.

Yeah I hate him and he hates "Rock N' Roll Punks"


kill him.
#33
Quote by andyd93
We have a guy called Ronnie Turner, better known locally as Swazzy. He used to be a copper in the 70's and early 80's round here, real bastard my grandad told me. Somehow he lost both of his legs and now he rides around on the roads in a wheelchair wearing the same clothes all the time, handlebar moustache. Everybody knows him round here, he does a lot of charity work now. Pretty good bloke, ive spoke to him a few times... Cant find a pic of him anywhere...



i lived in wirral for 13 years and never even heard of him
"
#34

this is Zanta.
He's a complete drug addict (I'd know, I have him on MSN and he sits there smoking whatever the hell he can pull out of his ass), who runs around Toronto screaming "YES YES YES" and doing pushups on the Subway system and random events.

He's basically banned from everything.

He ONLY wearts red boxers and a Santa hat.
Theres definately a wikipedia article out there on him, but I'm too lazy to look it up.
i hope they cannot see
the limitless potential
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to murder everything
i hope they cannot see
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#36
^^ msn address....... now ( to idontloveyou )

,--.-'-,--.
\ /-~-\ /
/ )' a a `( \
( ( ,---. ) )
THIS WAS MEANT TO BE A PIG
\ `(_o_o_)' /
\ `-' /
| |---| |
[_] [_]
#37
My town has John, he's the biggest drugy around and every saturday he trips on 'shrooms and rides around on his longboard wearing shinguards and hitting random people with one of those big foam cu-tips.
:
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#40
There's the guy in the lanes who runs around with a batman sticker on his head. Countless weird buskers and tramps. Some people near the college who go round collecting litter all day in trolleys to recycle and send scrap profits to a orphanage in India.

there was one tramp at the co-op near me called Jerry who was a constant source of harassment to the staff and a never ending torrent of amusement to me and my friends (Ironically a few of them work there now). He's been dead for a while but his tour de force was when they banned him from buying drink he sung a ditty entitled "**** the co-op, They're all ****'s" at full volume.

I hope someone from Hassocks uses this site so they can tell us about Steve the swan guy.
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