#1
After some sort of creative stroke I came up with this, titled The Mad Juggler. I think the name fits quite well too. Tell me what you think, and by the way, don't download it thinking you aren't getting something chaotic or different, this is definitely both. If you liked my older works you will like this, but this is a bit more crazy.


EDIT: Updated song, attached it later in thread, heres link though

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=63323
Last edited by bloodshed344 at Apr 21, 2008,
#2
now this is my kind of music
its really good
only thing i would look at is the transition into the acoustic bit and out of it
unless the singer is holding a note or a scream then it might sound pretty good

anyway i love it
would love to hear a recording of it
#3
I loved it from the 93rd bar.
The whole thing was rather TDEP-esque.
#4
You're right, it does remind of The Dilinger Escape Plan! It's really good! It's not beautiful (mathcore? lol) but it is... really math-y. Great Job!
Quote by RhyseOrtiz
Banned because.. that was brilliant, champayne


Some of My Recent Songs

[thread="1403441"]Synthetic Damage WIP[/thread]

[thread="1350364"]The Nightman Awakens[/thread]

[thread="1322579"]Into the Sunset WIP[/thread]

[thread="1296556"]Frost[/thread]
[thread="1247340"]The Butter Knife Massacre[/thread]
[thread="1253933"]Into The Sparta Pit[/thread]

[thread="1224038"]Untitled Tech Thing[/thread]
#6
In contrast to ctb, i enjoyed everything pre-bar 93. I've never listened to TDEP, but if this is how they sound, I want to.

I'd love to hear an .mp3 with a vocalist, because you can defiantley tell that there was one in mind.

There's a couple things i'd like to especially point out, we'll start with the cons:
-I think you used the 4-5 hi-hat transition too much (4, 26, 55, etc.) and judging from this music, I know you can think of better transitions, it just sounds kind of unoriginal when compared to this piece, which is really well done.
-The 77 transition. I know most people have told you about this, but I just wanted to mention it, I think there should be something more there.
-The ONLY section where I feel the time signature is forced is 93. The 22/8 you have going feels like it should be straight 9/8 or 10/8, those extra two beats feel out of place.
Now on to the good:
-GREAT, GREAT, GREAT use of time signature in this piece! Mathcore is a dying genre, and it makes me happy to see someone utilizing more than 1 or 2 times in their piece. You do a great job making things feel normal, even in distinctly odd time signatures (121 until the end was brilliant, best choatic 10/8 i've heard)
-Love your guitar riffs, finally, some guitar that isn't just "chug-chug-chug." I love it. It reminds me of Mastodon a little bit (Capallarian Crest), was really awesome. (9, for example, so awesome.)
-Your scales you're using sound organized, but random at the same time. Really good. -Your Rhythm guitar part is actually a guitar part! (instead of a carbon copy of lead with sometimes backing up chords)

Great song, I loved it.

9/10

Wanna crit mine?
http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=13899746#post13899746
4/4 is just so boring. <_<
#7
Thanks for the crit, I appreciate it. I redid some things, made the transitions a lot better, and added bass (Good bass mind you).

Also, that part at measure 93 was meant to sound that way, sound kind of out of place until it started fitting in at measure 103.

But, thanks alot for your crit man, and here is the new version.
Attachments:
The Mad Juggler V2 (GP4, GP5, MIDI).zip
#9
first riff was cool until you harmonised it, i understand you were going for dissonance but when a riff already sounds horrible (in a good way) you should try harmonise it in perfect 5ths or something which will keep it sounding weird as feck but still make a cool harmony. loved the riff at 49 really heavy

then the mad bass after that was great. the riff at 62 was awesome, just the kind of weird timing i like, but the riff just before and after it was pretty laclustre tbh, the fill bits just sounded really boring.

the clean section was sweet and you had a cool harmony thing goin on. the riff after was a bit of a head **** lol then th 10/8 riff with the lead was awesome, best part in my opinion especially with the tempo increase.

mind checking out mine?
definitely not as ****ed up as yours but i think youll like it anyways

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=843448

#10
Thanks for the crits, i critted both of your topics in return. Those boring fill bits you said were lackluster, that's mainly for vocals, it's probably the easiest section to make lyrics to.

Also in the first riff I wasn't harmonizing it, the second guitar was actually playing a different riff. Anyway, I did harmonize it with perfect fifths and it sounds awesome.
And thanks for the compliments on the bass guys, I tried pretty hard on it.
#11
Well, that was... interesting. I think my favourite part was the ending, it was very messy, but in a good way. This is probably personal preference, but the rest of the music (bar a few bits, like the 8/8 - 6/8 guitar - 8/8 - 6/8 other guitar part -that was brill!) was a bit too incomprehensible for me. I appreciate it, yes - it was definately a brilliant song for mathcore, but the only thing I could say would be tone it down a bit! For example, the harmony in the first riff you did wasn't exactly needed, and the 11/8 to 16/8 riff was a bit too mind-f*ck for me.

All in all, a good song for what you set out to do, but a little to crazy for me

8/10

Oh, and cheers for critting mine ^^.
#13
Well... I didn't like this, ha.

But I'll try to crit you as a musician, not as a listening dude.

The first 8 bars lead up VERY well to the chaos that ensues, and yeah - the bass rocks. I'm sure that this was the effect you were going for, but things seemed to repeat far too often. I'm gonna put that down to my own musical tastes though... you may have overused your riffs, but you overused some damn good riffs.

I'll save myself time now, by saying every fill was awesome.

I'll waste some of that saved time, the bar 48 fill ruled. And I very much liked the riff that came after it. The bass slide at the end of that riff was also cool.

The bar 53 - 55 sections was cool... but the riff after seemed to repeat too much. I guess with vocals that'd seem less of a problem. Bars 62 - 69 seemed kinda out of time. Not 'cause of the 7/8... in fact I reckon it'd sorta flow better if bar 65 was in 7/8 aswell, gives it more pace. Then again, it seems like you went for a disjointed feel on purpose, so bearing that in mind, you've done well.

That next riff is getting kinda catchy...

77/78 - what a fill!

The 9/8 bit from bar 92 gets repetitive... I think that could be 'cause you've kept a 9/8 drum beat under it. Sticking a 4/4 beat under a wierd time sig guitar part can destory any repetitive feel, that may have been one of those times?
(Having said that, I envy your ability to write time sigged drums like that, mine are never too hot.)

Bar 94, what a fill, ooh.

I do like this next part. I can imagine some serious vocals over it, actually.
The variation from bar 103 works INCREDIBLY well, and the drums are just tip-top.

That lead part from bar 108 is perfect, and the dual part from bar 112 is my favourite part of this piece. In rather reminds me of Cannibal Corpse, although that's probably just the fact that it's a) not in 4/4 and b) using thirds.

And the way the drums and bass completely fly of the handle for the rest of this piece... MWAH, as an italian chef would say, that's some goooooooood outro.

And yeah, this piece fits the title PERFECTLY.

I'd give this a 9.5/10 ... I don't like a couple of the riffs out of it, sure - but those riffs sure fit the stlye, it's just not one I usually go for.
Thinking musically, I could only find a few iffy bits, which I mention so... wicked.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=15137316#post15137316

I've just updated it, so scroll down to my second post, yeah...
...it's fairly time siggy, but quite different from this.

Man... I'm gonna have to check out some more of your stuff!


Until next crit,

Rob
#14
That was an excellent peice. The drums were excellent and the dissonance was spot on. Some of the riffs seemed to be repeated a bit too much but vocals would probably fix that. The only spot that was kind of rough was the transition to clean at 77. 77 inturrpts the flow in my opinion but that can be fixed with a little transition run of something of that like. Also I would tune up a step or a step and a half for clarity but thats just personal taste. Over all a very strong song.

And thanks for the crit on mine.
Sig What?
#15
Ima start by sayin this isnt the sorta metal id usually go for.
I will follow that by sayin i was still very impressed by this peice.
It kept me payin attention throughout, which i usually find hard with midi.
There were some great riffs in there i loved the part around 95 where it gets real heavy.
Good work overall mate i give you ratings.
Crit mine?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=937465
Watch out for FLOODS exploding onto the UK Deathcore scene this summer.
#16
JimmyPage97, I wouldn't say mathcore is dying.
Check out Look What I Did.
Strange stuff. Post-mathcore if I've ever heard it.

THIS IS AWESOME!!!
So much madness!
The beginning is kinda brooding, then bass comes up all awkward and funky.
By the time the guitar is in, the pain is delivered.
And the brief respite taking place at 49 is very well done. It gives your listeners a chance to breathe. Good job.
I could go on and on about each section. But would take forever to be finish this crit, so no.

The transitions for such a sloppy song are actually quite fitting.
I hear TDEP (as you said before) all over this, and in a good way.
I've critted a lot of pieces, and the thing that most people lack in their songs is good cadence. You seem to have a knack for strong conclusions.
As you can tell, I think the ending is badass. The song just speeds up and gets sucked up into oblivion.

I wondering is this song can even be played.
You may need to call Weinman and Co.

9.5/10
#17
Quote by ealtdharkon
Well... I didn't like this, ha.

But I'll try to crit you as a musician, not as a listening dude.

The first 8 bars lead up VERY well to the chaos that ensues, and yeah - the bass rocks. I'm sure that this was the effect you were going for, but things seemed to repeat far too often. I'm gonna put that down to my own musical tastes though... you may have overused your riffs, but you overused some damn good riffs.

I'll save myself time now, by saying every fill was awesome.

I'll waste some of that saved time, the bar 48 fill ruled. And I very much liked the riff that came after it. The bass slide at the end of that riff was also cool.

The bar 53 - 55 sections was cool... but the riff after seemed to repeat too much. I guess with vocals that'd seem less of a problem. Bars 62 - 69 seemed kinda out of time. Not 'cause of the 7/8... in fact I reckon it'd sorta flow better if bar 65 was in 7/8 aswell, gives it more pace. Then again, it seems like you went for a disjointed feel on purpose, so bearing that in mind, you've done well.

That next riff is getting kinda catchy...

77/78 - what a fill!

The 9/8 bit from bar 92 gets repetitive... I think that could be 'cause you've kept a 9/8 drum beat under it. Sticking a 4/4 beat under a wierd time sig guitar part can destory any repetitive feel, that may have been one of those times?
(Having said that, I envy your ability to write time sigged drums like that, mine are never too hot.)

Bar 94, what a fill, ooh.

I do like this next part. I can imagine some serious vocals over it, actually.
The variation from bar 103 works INCREDIBLY well, and the drums are just tip-top.

That lead part from bar 108 is perfect, and the dual part from bar 112 is my favourite part of this piece. In rather reminds me of Cannibal Corpse, although that's probably just the fact that it's a) not in 4/4 and b) using thirds.

And the way the drums and bass completely fly of the handle for the rest of this piece... MWAH, as an italian chef would say, that's some goooooooood outro.

And yeah, this piece fits the title PERFECTLY.

I'd give this a 9.5/10 ... I don't like a couple of the riffs out of it, sure - but those riffs sure fit the stlye, it's just not one I usually go for.
Thinking musically, I could only find a few iffy bits, which I mention so... wicked.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=15137316#post15137316

I've just updated it, so scroll down to my second post, yeah...
...it's fairly time siggy, but quite different from this.

Man... I'm gonna have to check out some more of your stuff!


Until next crit,

Rob


Yeah, you will!