#1
Hey, here's a new song from me after a long time. I was stuck on this song for a while, as I kinda have difficulty writing some of the parts, especially the orchestra + writer's block here and there.

This is basically a symphonic epic metal thingy (emphasis on the symphonic, although I'm not quite sure about the genre, can anyone clarify it?), and is 10 minutes long (sigh, can't seem to write short songs ), although I initially tried to make it only 5-8 minutes. It consist of two movement, each part about 5 minutes long, the first one being more aggressive and fast, while the second is more progressive and tends to be slower.

Well, hope you enjoy, and I'll gladly crit yours if you give me *constructive* crits and/or tips!
Attachments:
ALTTMOAS.zip
ALTTMOAS MIDI.zip
Last edited by MarchOfEternity at Apr 26, 2008,
#2
Listening to this song now, and it sounds pretty good.

I wanna tell you a little bit about Symphonic Epic/Power Metal songs, most of them are about 7 to 15 minutes long, cause that is one thing that makes them EPIC!

After listening to the whole song: 8.75/10 Very good, I like it. Now go give it vocals.
#3
Well done. I liked your almost constant use of the english horn.
My Only problem is all of your lead riffs sound alike.
Just up the scale, down the scale.
Also, the legato's to a different octave sound awful.
Like the one at bar 176; Guitar 2.
It's quite chaotic too. maybe you should adjust some of the orchestral instruments. Especially during guitar solos.
Overall, I'd say pretty damn good.

8/10
P.S: you're not getting replies for sheer length. Most people here feel like listening to something 5 mins and under.
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#4
The intro... I couldn't hear the piano.. Or maybe I did, but it didn't register.
I think the chord at 16 could use a swell since it's dissonant and is used to lead into the "heavy" part.
At 41 I think the lead could use being brought out some. The rhythm sounds louder, which might be what you're going for.. Especially if there's lyrics over that. But in GP, it's hard to tell. lol
I can't really hear the guitar in the chorus.
84 is pretty dissonant.. Don't know if you were going for that or not.
I really like 113, the interlude, and the solo has potential. The solo is a little low in the mix.. It sounds like a lead meant to be behind some lyrics.
I like the bridge after the solo as well.. I feel like the solo ends rather abruptly though... It feels like the note is too long to be a quick ending, and too short to be a "long" ending.
I like the transition into Part II.
When the guitars come in, they're barely audible at all.. Only a few random notes get through... And they sound like they're in a different key than the rest of what's going on it seems.
I like the transition into the bridge at 240/241.
I like your solos.. But you're keeping them in the guitars.. Give some other instruments a chance to shine. =P
The transition at 269/270 is too drastic for me.. Maybe if you have a tone that leads into that dark sounding part. .But right now it's like "Melodic, melodic, melodic, heavy.' when I think it'd sound better like "Melodic, melodic, SomeWeirdDissonantNoteInLeadGuitarOverTopMelodicness, heavy." lol
It feels the same way going into the breakdown..
I'm not sure if you're going for it, but the harmonies at 310/311/etc are really.. Dissonant, not sweet-sounding.

Good song man. =)
8/10 (which is great)
Also, thanks for the crit.
#6
I gotta say, that sounds great. But you do need to work on your solos. And in some parts it sounds pretty messy. But it's still great.

8/10.
#7
I will probably crit this later on, but I really wish people would stop putting 'symphonic epic progressive metal' as the genre on their threads, it just sounds plain old gay.
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#8
Oh great, 2 real crit out of 6 . But anyway, thanks for the crits guys!

Garb : The dissonance at 16 is intentional, as I think it is a good transition to the heavy part. Well, that's what I thought anyway, turned out it's ****, no?
The lead at 41 is just some mini-solo made out of random improv. It's there to liven it up the song more than anything else.
The chorus is just, well, a mess... I agree, the mix was meh there, you couldn't listen to anything there. But I was just trying to create a wall of sound there for the vocal to sing over, in which it did a great job imo . Oh yeah, and my mixing skill sucks .
310 was meant to be dissonant and unpleasant sounding, as it leads to the fast part at 314.
Lol, solos on other instruments, might have to try it next time!

Duncang : That's why it has question mark next to the genre . I'm not quite sure of what to call it, as it has a bit from everything, imo. Care to help me defining the genre?

Oh btw, do you guys think that the ending (and part II in general) is a bit rushed and too short? Just wanna know that, thanks.
Last edited by MarchOfEternity at Apr 26, 2008,
#9
Drums Lead And Rhythm Are solid, Some of the Strings seem off a bit. I love your break down dude. So evil >. The Rhythm Guitar with the chords coming around during the solo is spectacular. Strings get better, Fits now... The whole song is a 11/10 cus of how much work this is. And its just pure ownage dude lol. Can u play this ? or is this just for show and tell. hehe great job thow. Very little room for improvement cus you've got so much going on. I guess its just a little too long for me. c4c https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=846927
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#10
Ok, this is hard to crit for me....

Ok lets start: THe intro "Visions" was nice, but somehow i failed to see the melody in there. THe Rest was nice, but there were too much tracks for me. Cut them down a bit and the song will flow better. Much better. You also need to improve on the vocals. THey seem a bit boring... try to put the notes not always on 4s. I liked the inrto of the second part better, but the solo was a big turn off for me. THere was too much stuff going on. Then the brigde.... Somehow it didn´t flow with the rest of the song. THe breakdown was better, but again there was too much stuff going on for me...

The songs overall a good idea, but it needs work. 7/10. I´d also like to hear a real record of that song! That would be pretty epic!
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#11
Like Madzaa *Sorry, my keyboard can't do the dotted A's* said. I can't see any melody in the intro. But it was somehow it seemed fitting to the rest of the song.

When the guitars come in, thats a cool heavy riff you got going there. And when the lead & harmony comes in it's still pretty cool. The riff after that from 33 untill 41 was a bit A7x'y when the lead come in it put me off a bit. It jsut didn't seem right to me.

The lead at 53 is pretty cool. When the vocals come in, they're barely audible.

The prechorus was pretty cool, good chord useage!
And the vocals are more audible in the chorus, probably because of the higher 'singing'!

The bridge was very nice, it's heavy, yet EPIC.

The interlude was pretty amazing, it all gets calmer there without losing intensity.
Nice harmonys there aswell. The solo was dull, it went on for way to long. But you had some nice ideas in there. Sort of Dragonforcey, i'm not a fan of them. But they have some cool ideas in there lead work.

The second bridge was cool, again calmer. Nice harmonys, very Avenged Sevenfold.

When the part 2 bit came in, I was suprised. It's much slower than the first part. It's a good contrast. The solo was cool, much better than the other solo.

The bridge didn't seem to fit, again it sounded to upbeat for the song in my opnion.

The second solo in part 2 was okay, nothing speical though.

The blast beat in the bridge sounded weird. But it was a cool riff.

Some of the harmonys after that didn't really sound in key. The riff after that made me thing of Duality by Slipknot.

Thats a breakdown?! I thought breakdowns were meant to be like, the heavyest part of the song? Or do I just listen to too much metalcore?! Although, it was cool anyways.

The outro was a very EPIC. A good way to tie up the song.

Overall, 7.5/10. Not really my type of music but theres potentiol for a really good song here!
I deeply regret the 6661 in my username. Siiiigh. Damn you, 14 year old me, you edgy little bastard.
#12
JT: 'cept for some of the sweep parts and that bit at the end (which is more of a "AlternatePickAsFastAsYouCanWhileFrettingRandomNotes" instead of a proper solo) I could pretty much play it

Madzää: gah, I can't do vocals even if my life depends on it... dunno, maybe it's because I used to despise vox

Carl6661: yeah, part I was really inspired by A7X, mostly by their song A Little Piece of Heaven (shame not many people likes it).
Lol, DragonForce. I didn't try to wrote a DF-type solo though, I was trying a Megadeth-esque solo for the first one... Oh, and wtf, Slipknot??
Oh, breakdowns are
A break may be described as when the song takes a "breather, drops down to some exciting percussion, and then comes storming back again" and compared to a fake ending. Breaks usually occur two-thirds to three-quarters of the way through a song (Brewster and Broughton 2003, p.79).


Now I'm confused about the bridge at 241... Some people liked it, and some thinks it doesn't fit . I myself think that it's good, but.... dunno, anyone got any idea?
#13
Yarrr, I though of A Little Piece Of Heaven for the intro.

And i'm not sure, I haven't realy ever listened to Megadeth. So I don't know what their solos are like. But it reminded me of DF.

And the Slipknotty bit was similair to the intro riff in Duality, but in a cool way.
I deeply regret the 6661 in my username. Siiiigh. Damn you, 14 year old me, you edgy little bastard.
#14
First off:

There are *way* too many instruments going into play here. For the whole duration of the song it was like listening to a wall of indistinguishable noise. Nothing stood out from each other, and it has hard to focus on any single instrument - that is, when they weren't drowning out each other.

Song-wise, I couldn't notice anything outstanding. The heavy riffs were, truth be told, generic, and only barely fit with the rest of the song. Plus, dissonance just randomly appeared throughout the song in about five or six different places, probably as a result from all the instrumentation. When I muted and solo'd some of the tracks, some of the riffs were actually pretty damn good. I really liked a lot of guitar 1's work. But I couldn't even tell it was playing with all the other instruments going on. The leads were good, but the solos left something to be desired, especially the last one (I think) where it just drops off.

The song felt somewhat unorganized and sloppy as well. It was hard to discern any recognizable form of progression, and when it ended, it was kind of like: "Okay..." The acoustics were good...but again, you just couldn't here them.

This definitely needs some work done on it. I like what you've done but not how you've done it. Make the riffs stand out; sometimes a wall of noise can be great, but in this instance, unfortunately, it's not.

A 7/10.
#15
sweet song, but theres a lot going on. That made the beginning of the solo sound kinda messy. Part 2 is nice and calm ussually. Sometimes the instruments don't mix too well. Love the second solo sounded sweet. The breakdown sounded awesome, the synths caused a little to much dissonance though. Overall, great song. 8/10
#16
ok, sorry for the extreme lateness man haha

The intro was nice. It sounded like old school rpg music kinda, which is awesome. It transferred to the next part good too. The next riff was just kinda meh to me though. It just sounded kinda generic, and like I've heard it a lot before. the strings were a nice touch though.

The little fill at bar 41 was cool. The harmonies at 49 were quite awesome. The strings behind it were good but sounded a little too high. Maybe try to includesome lower bass notes orsome from the actual chord in the chord progression a little more, so it sounds fuller. Verse 1 was pretty sweet too. Pre-chorus was boring imo, but I lovd the dissonance in bar 72, you should've expanded on that part a little more.

Chorus was wicked, but it sounded like too much was going on with the horn and clarinet going too. Imo, you should take those parts out a nad do some stuff with the strings instead, just a suggestion. The melodies are killer though. Bridge was kinda meh,but it transferred tothe verse well, so it's fine where it is. man, the chords in the verse are really something haha. I wish you would've used em a little more to kinda have like a big buildup or something.

Interlude was pretty sweet, but I think it sounded like too much was going on with the vocals carrying a melody while the guitar had the lead goin.

Solo was good too, but the chords in bars 139 and 143 sounded really off key. I also didn't really like how you let the notes ring in bar 160, it sounded bad imo. Rest of the solo was pretty good though. Transfer to the bridge is kind of abrubt too, with the tempo change and all. The rest of the bridge was good too, except I didn't really like how you had the strings as 8th notes with rests. I think at one point they should ahve just held the chordnotes for the entiremeasure,cuz it sounds like it's building up, but it doesn't when it goes into part II really.

Part II is pretty sweet though. I liked the acoustic part at bar 209. Verse 1 sounds good, but once again, I feel like there's too much going on, and no one melody really sticks out or stays in my head.

Solo was good, but bar 228 sounded really off with that weird-ass chord haha. Bars 235 and 236 sounded really awkard with the rests and all. Bar was 240 was a little too psycho as well

The bridge afterwards sounded really out of place too. the riff didn't fit the mood the song had created so far, and the tempo change was far too abrupt. Bridge was ok, kinda just sounded like your average power metal riff though. Nothing bad, just generic imo.

Bridge was waaay out of place at bar 270. At this point it kinda sounded like you were just throwing random riffs on to make the song longer. The drums sounded way too frantic and it didn't fit the rest of the song at all. Breakdown was more of an interlude then a breakdown imo. It would've sounded better on acoustics rather then distortion like you had it. it also sounded like too much was going on, like you were trying to make it too complex.

there were also a buncha off-key notes in there too, like in bars 311, 313, 315, and a couple other places too. The outro was kinda meh too. The melodies were'nt really that strong, and it didn't really seem that thought out. Just using random notes froma scale with varying rhythms imo.

Overall, this started out as a pretty coolsong, but then it started going downhill, just cuz it felt like you were trying to make the song longer then it should have been. then there were a bunch of places where too much stuff was going on, and more off-key notes started to show up. I think you should just get rid of some parts, cuz it doesn'tallflow together as nicely as it should for being one song. Sorry if I sounded like an ass in any way, just trying to give my thoughts on how some things might be improved. Best of luck man
#17
I will also crit as I listen. Firstly, nice song name.

I like the intro, very medieval. It's a bit dissonant at times, but there's nothing wrong with that. The part where the guitars and drums come in is awesome, nothing that needs to be changed. I barely noticed it was changing from 3/4 to 4/4, that's probably a good thing. I liked the following riffs and leads but I'm not sure about the solos, they don't seem to have much special about them. I liked the harmonies around 52-60 though.

The pre-chorus was nice, the chorus was very epic and had a great vocal melody, especially the end. The bridge is awesome, I didn't like the interlude too much though, it seemed a bit pointless and didn't have too much special about it. Solos were pretty cool but again not too special.

The bridge with the bass riffs and harmonies were very good I thought, it's a bit long though.

Part II started pretty well, it's got some nice things going on there. I think there should be more vocals in here, there wasn't much memorable stuff happening around 213 to 217. I barely noticed the verse to be honest. The bridge was okay, it wasn't till around 249 that it really started being anything that special though. Verse two was pretty good, 278 was kind of interesting with the dissonance, 294 onward was a bit boring until 324 where there was a cool melody going on there, it was a bit out of key around there though. I really liked the outro solo, but I thought the outro would sound better without bars 342 to 245.

Overall you had some good things going on there, but it was very drawn out and at times felt like you were just adding things for the sake of having a longer song, which will only result in the song being boring. There were some cool riffs, but there weren't any melodies I found too memorable. It started out really well but went kind of downhill, I think if you want this song to be better you'll have to cut out large peices of music and make the melodies a lot stronger, especially toward the end.

Sorry if this sounded harsh because there were some great things happening, but it seemed like you kind of lost inpiration about halfway through and just tried to finish it.
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Last edited by whalepudding at May 4, 2008,
#18
Pretty good song. It had alot of good ideas but many of them seemed not to play out quite right. The dueling guitars thing you have going on earlyin the song is a good idea but the melodys are kind of boring. try spiceing those up a bit. the first bridge at 160 was really jarring. It seemed like the drums were keeping the momentum going where the rest of the instruments were binging the momentum down. The transition from the first movement to the second movement was kind of rocky as well. probably just too many instruments going at the same time. if you cut some of the instruments out it would probbably help the song as a whole. Section that starts at 240 is really good all the way through the second bridge at 270. From 270 to 300 just seems out of place. The end of the breakdown is really chaotic but thats probably an instrumentation issue. The outro is my favourite part of the song. very well done.

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