#1
I knew that would catch your attention.
But in all "SERIUSNESS", I am pretty serious, you don't have to take it seriously though, I don't expect you to.

Ok, basically, I've made a horrible decision, and I have no one but myself to blame. Long version ahead.

I just ended secondary school last year, or what you americans call "high school". And I decided to continue on with a normal education.
Well, I hate it.
I don't hate the education so much as I hate the people in it. Well sorry, hate is too strong of a word. I don't connect with the people in it. I still do hate the current state I am in though.

I think I would fit much better in an arts school.
Frankly, I find the people here extremely boring. I don't find any need to socialize properly because I don't find them enjoyable to be around. People think I'm anti-social but the truth is I just can't be fcked to hang out with people I don't like. I'm sure everyone feels the same way.
Now, please keep in mind I'm doing a foundation course in Australia, a foundation course that is filled with Asians. And frankly, I do not get along well with the general asian population. And, I am Asian myself btw. No I am not racist against my own people, but I cannot get along with alot of them. Just imagine how horrible it is for me since Asians born and bred in Asian communities are more prone to have the hive mentality.
Another thing is, I just hate the idea of being confined to academic studies for so many years of my life, I want to become a psychologist but I don't think I have the determination to spend 7 years of my life to actually become one, or spend a few years and become something I totally hate.

Okay, the big problem is, my parents have paid for all the school fees, lodging etc etc. I'm basically in one big fckhole of a situation right now. If I tell my parents I don't like it here and I want to go somewhere else, it would be absolutely ridiculous. My parents are terribly nice though and I'm sure they would support me no matter what I wanted to do, even if they get pissed off. But the thing is, I can't help but face the fact that they have spent tens of thousands of dollars on me, and I have gone and just wasted it.
Furthermore, if I stop this, I don't know what I would do.
I have a few occupations in mind, musician, writer or photographer(not likely).
But basically all of these are very... "unrealistic" jobs that people generally frown upon in the Asian community.
If I did any of these I would probably go to Japan since most of Asia hates anything to do with the arts and Caucasian countries hate Asians in their media. I also like the sound of the language, which is a huge part in it. And of course, I like Japan alot.


SUMMARY:
I don't like people where I am.
I am working towards something that I would not like.
Parents have spent alot of money to get me where I am.
I want to leave.
I want to work my way to do something to do with the arts, but I constantly get discouraged by society(especially since I'm Asian). I also do understand the difficulty in earning a living doing these things, but I am willing to go through financial difficulty to work as something I love, as opposed to doing something I hate and having money.


So I want to ask you guys.
Am I being a deluded spoilt brat or do I have a right to be unhappy and make a change, even though it might be at a huge financial cost?
I am 17 btw.
#2
Do what you want. Trying to please your parents instead of yourself is a recipe for failure.
#3
You've always got the right to make a change, but you need to contribute and help your parents out if you're gonna change. Before you do anything figure out what you want to do, and know that you're gonna stick with it. You might still change again, but you need a solid idea.
#5
Quote by smb
Do what you want. Trying to please your parents instead of yourself is a recipe for failure.

I agree.

Quote by rougegratton
lol ur fvcked

#6
I went to the local conservatorium of music. It was like heaven. Even the ****ing percussionists were actual musicians and not just drummers I was like *drool*... I got drunk off what had to have been the BEST scotch and cokes i've EVER had made for me before.

But most of the people I met otherwise seemed quite caught up in their given subject and couldn't talk about anything else.
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#7
just tell your parents your not happy etc etc with where you are. They might get a little annoyed, but if they support you and stuff they'll probably help you find somewhere.

And fees and stuff will sometimes be partially refunded if you leave a school/halls
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#8
Quote by rougegratton
lol ur fvcked

lol nice input.

Do what YOU want man. Its your life, and I'm sure all your parent really want for you in the end is to be happy, and if you're not then make a change.
#9
'Caucasian countries hate Asians in their media'

lol wut. Ayumi Hamasaki ftw. Theres heaps of awesome asian music, and I don't mind the like drama stuff my friends have shown me.

But yeah, your parents should understand, this is pretty much paving the pathway for your future, so if you are 200% sure, yes you have to be so sure it's impossibly sure, you want to do something else then do it. It's better than trying to do it later on.
#11
If you're only in first year, change now.
You'll regret it otherwise.

But then again things tend to get more interesting as they go on.
I considered dropping out of my course in first year. I decided not to because the only other things I had in mind were all arty things like yours. They are all things that you can easily do on the side of study and work hard at once you're finished in college if you still feel that way.

I'm in 3rd year now and I really love what I do, but then again I have made a lot of very good friends in my course too.

If you're sure you want to drop out, do. It'll be a bigger waste of money if you stay
~Domino?

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#12
Have your parents read your post?
Maybe that would be a good place to start?

You can get their reaction from reading that, then discuss it with them afterwards.

I am guessing you live at home?
Derp.
#13
next time have the summary befiore the wall of text

do what you want to do (its better than asking a guitar forum what you want)
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#14
Is this you?

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This man deserves my +1

+1

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#16
Well, I can relate to your story.
I was always gifted with all things IT, and as such, my higher education choice was Network Design.
I slept through the whole course, as it was all way to easy for me.

Now, I work in IT, and my sister says I am so lucky cause my path was always clear.
What she, or my parents for that matter, don't know is that my heart is not into it anymore. I worked for 5 different companies in the last 5 years, and the fun is gone, the whole reason for me to like IT is gone.

The only times I actually like what I am doing is when I am touring with one of the bands I am guitartech for.

I just wish I knew this earlier, because it feels like such a wate of time and resources to me now. I can't make a living off of my guitartech job either, so I am really wondering what to do now....

As for you: Be certain about what you want to do, what you think will make you happy and what you can see yourself doing in 20 years (realistically). Then, make your decision and stick to it. The only wrong choice is the one that ends up causing you to be unhappy.
#17
I can relate to this. The thing with me is that I don't mind doing what my parents want because I am fairly capable at doing whatever and they are quite flexible in the careers I chose.

Don't go to university if you aren't an academic, don't like studying or don't have the endurance to follow through. If university is too over your head but you still want a tertiary education, go to TAFE instead. If you ever choose to go to TAFE, just get a certificate in something fairly easy or interesting or in a field that is subsidised so you can easily swap to different fields if you don't like it. Going to TAFE allows you to get decent jobs, fairly decent if you choose the right field (oil and gas or just being a lab tech). Work should be plentiful for you when you come out and you will be able to settle down with a job, decent wage and have the rest of your life to get into all kinds of crap.

If you don't want to study at all, you could always work at a variety of places whether it is crap work or good and build up your resume. After a few years of working, you can go for better jobs since people also look for WORK ETHIC as well as initial qualifications. For some jobs, some companies will train you if you have no previous related work experience. If you go this way, you'll start off with making crappy money but as things go forward, you can work your way up. When a university graduate comes out, sure they might make more money than you but YOU made money while they were in school and YOU were living your life the way YOU want to.

Take me for example. I got 91.3 TER in 2006 which is quite high. I enrolled in an engineering degree at Curtin and changed majors. Now I'm stuck with 2 more years of school in Kalgoorlie ASSUMING I pass everything this year. I have math units this semester and math is just starting to suck a lot. I have a life going to university so that is not so bad but the study and the need for good grades is catching up to me since you need decent grades to get picked over other engineers. I study full time and I only work for my dad 2 days each week.

My brother repeated year 12 twice, a waste. After a while he just went to work at a service station and did a TAFE course for a Certificate 3 in Lab Techniques. After years of more working, he landed a job making glass and then some jobs at Pilbara where he made about 1500 dollars a week after tax. After working for about 4-6 months, he went on a holiday and spent 6 months being unemployed. Now he is back to work with a company which may pay him 80-100k a year.

When I get out with a degree, I'll probably make about 60-80k in my first year and when I get charted status, then I can make an excess of 100k a year. I sound like the winner but how long is it going to take me to finish my degree? 4 years assuming I don't fail. If I fail, I have to spend an extra year. If I fail the same unit twice, my enrollment is terminated and I'm thrown out on my arse. Also, how long is it going to take me to get charted status. Maybe another 3 years worth. By that time, my brother could have made heaps of money while I was getting my **** together.

Going to TAFE, university or joining the work force straight away are viable career options and these options work for different people. It is alright to be angry, feel out of place etc. if you chose a **** option. You felt unhappy about your current path and you know it. All you can do know is either grow some balls and continue or you can grow some balls and identify where you see yourself 6 years down the track. If you don't see yourself successfully completing your foundation course well or within a reasonable time period, get yourself out of the foundation course and consider the options I wrote on the wall of text above. If you don't see yourself doing will in that course years down the track, it is better to waste the money now than heaps of money if you bail out later in life.
#18
hey, I think I know where you're coming from. I had to go through the Foundation Year program before I could enter any tertiary study here in Sydney, which at first seemed alright with me - easy grades and a path into one of the good uni's in the area.

I got there though, and felt like an outcast, because even though I'm half asian, I really don't look it (basically I'm American). So it was impossible (it felt like) to make friends, even though normally I'm sociable and easy to get along with. Also, there were only a couple of people who shared my interests, be it music or sports or just wanting to go out and have a big night.

I made it through Foundation Year and am now studying at Uni, which is 20x better easily. I still look back at foundation year and absolutely hate it, but I just put my head down and powered through. So I guess I'm trying to say, it sucks, but maybe if you just got through Foundation Year with your sights on going to Uni (cuz thats all it is, a transition or sorts) before doing anything rash? (1st post! and its huuuuuuge!), you'll find you'll actually come to like studying in Australia? In uni you'll find like minded people cuz you really get to choose what courses you want, so you surround yourself with people who are into the same stuff as you.
Last edited by edcore at Apr 22, 2008,
#20
holy crap, im just like you mean, dont get along well with my own race either, and im pretty much a social outcast at my school. i dont like where i am either, its a bloody expensive school but they're ****ing cheap, and they try to make you buy **** you dont need. gaah im just going on a rant about my school
#21
i'm just like u, most of my friends dont even consider me as asian anymore. i'm doin all the easy subjects at school, im **** at maths and i dont get along with most asians.

im goin to do a carpentry/cabinet maker apprenticeship after high school while goin to tafe(****tier alternative to uni), i always change my mind about what i want to do so i guess tafe is a safter route since it's way cheaper than uni.
Sincerely,
Shitstirrer
#22
I understand the need to impress your parents but it would be better and you would ultimately gain your independence if you did things for YOU.

I don't really bother with friends, either. I don't think I am anti-social, per say. I just don't believe in 5 years down the road when I have a wife and kids that having friends will be important, focus on yourself!

Best of luck to you, comrade.
''Technological advancements are like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal.'' - Albert Einstein
#23
Just tell your parents you dont like it there and see what they say about it
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#24
Thank you for all your replies.

Well, I'll be completely honest and say that I didn't consciously do it for my parents.
I didn't think I would dislike it here so much.
Because, being the idiot that I am, I didn't actually think about my future, I just thought, "Oooh, foundation year, then uni, then have a nice happy life ok no problem whatever."
Sadly, it took me intense unhappiness due to a huge number of factors to come to my senses and actually have a good think about it. And I don't even have to take responsibility for it, my parents are the one paying, that seriously makes me feel horrible. Especially since I've always been the black sheep, standing out amongst my overachieving siblings, and being spent on the most.


Anyway, I've had a night of tossing, turning and thinking. Then I woke up and thought about it some more, then while I was taking a dump in the toilet, I'm pretty sure I know what I want now. I figured out that the only reason I would stay on in this, or in Uni, would be if I met a bunch of people I really liked. I have to do what I know makes me happy, and that would be making music. I'm not saying I wouldn't need people I like, we all need people, but I really see myself getting really really depressed if I stay on in Uni and mindlessly do stuff that I don't really have a passion for. Furthermore, I'd probably meet alot more people I like playing music than I would in some university.

I'm going to talk to the school counsellor later today.
By tonight, I'm pretty sure this is what I would want, I'll have to remove any hint of doubt first.
I already have a pretty solid plan on what I want to do with my life.
I just hope my parents don't go apesh*t on me, though they have always been supportive of my decisions, my fckup is costing them a pretty huge deal of money.
#26
No problem Horebane.

Let me know if it works out alright, i wish you the best of luck!
Derp.
#28
Quote by asianthathatesasians

Another thing is, I just hate the idea of being confined to academic studies for so many years of my life, I want to become a psychologist but I don't think I have the determination to spend 7 years of my life to actually become one


ok so summing that up ur saying you WANT TO BECOME A PSYCHOLOGIST but u do not want to put in the 7 years of training to become one.

you obviously dont want to be a pyschologist then.

also i think u should just tell ur parents, although theyve put alot of hard earned money into your future that they thought u loved or watever, they're number one priority is that they want to see you happy.
#29
Most of asia hates the arts?
Total bs if you ask me.
Also,just do whatever else you want to do on the side.
Do you psycology crap and do music/photography in your spare time
#30
Quote by smunt2small123
van halens jump . "just go a head and jump" ...................of a building

Can you not post crap?
Thanks.
Derp.
#31
Quote by .Will.
Have your parents read your post?
Maybe that would be a good place to start?

You can get their reaction from reading that, then discuss it with them afterwards.

I am guessing you live at home?

His parents won't read it
They would look at it and go
tl;dr
#32
Well, once you leave high school and get to university where you live in your own room and you're pretty much an adult, you're going to find alot, I mean ALOT of difficulty making yourself study because your parents aren't around to encourage you as much and you'd have already been doing something you disliked.

Tell your parents how you feel, and make a lengthy apology and tell them you really want them to understand because it's not your fault you don't like it and explain WHY you can't do it anymore in Uni.

As you can see from my UG name, I'm asian aswell and I know the perils of having an asian parent, but if you do it really calmly and do it extremely sincerely, you should be fine, unless your parents have psychological problems.


EDIT:

Quote by timo1
Most of asia hates the arts?
Total bs if you ask me.
Also,just do whatever else you want to do on the side.
Do you psycology crap and do music/photography in your spare time



They don't completely hate the arts, only the majority of the parents would just prefer their child do an academic subject instead of an artistic one like music/drama or painting because the artistic ones are considered "lower class" to them in terms of social ranking, but don't get me wrong, they don't hate the arts or the people that do it, they'd just prefer that their child didn't do it themselves.
Last edited by XianXiuHong at Apr 23, 2008,
#34
Quote by timo1
His parents won't read it
They would look at it and go
tl;dr


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#35
Quote by smunt2small123
van halens jump . "just go a head and jump" ...................of a building


You spelled "off" wrong dumbass.

Try contributing something useful.

TS, I sympathize with you. Even though it sucks, most of us arn't going to get to do something enjoyable as a career. I think we just kind of have to live with it, or live in a trailer park.
#36
You dont need to like the people you work with. Go out and meet others, go to places arts students (or whoever else you think you connect with) go. Take the boringness of the education on the chin, not everyone does what they love. So yea just go out find new friends.
#37
Was it really necessary to dril into peoples heads to take this thread seriously? I think we get how serious you are from your post. Although, this is the pit afterall...