#2
i like it, your voice reminds me of the chili peppers singer, the keyboards were a little bit repetitive but i liked the vocal melody. Overall i did enjoy it, nice and mellow. good job.
"Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life.Get wasted all the time, and you'll have the time of your life!" ~ Billy Connolly
#3
hi, thnx, crit as listen, nice interesting intro, vocals are nice, need a bit of work but have a nice melody and you have made good lyrics, the bridge before the chorus is a good idea, chorus itself is catchy, voice could use more variation pitch wise, a bit monotone??? drums get extremely boring but since ur prob using a drum machine just to make the song more full they're okay, gd work

Patrick

x
#4
Overall, it's quite good, it could definitely do with additional instrumentation, or added vocals, as the keyboard riff isn't hugely earcatching, but the progression is fine, played well enough too. The vocals are quite good, though at times he seems slightly(and it is just very slightly) off tune, maybe as the notes are at the top of his range? Apart from that, no negative comments, lyrics are reasonable, and I'm guessing they're programmed drums?
Good work so.

Crit me at https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=796639
So many possibilities, so little ability.

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#5
Sounds pretty good, I definitly think that you need a guitar strumming those chords in the background and some backup vocals. Your voice reminds me very much of John Frusciante's especially during the verse. It a bit repetitive, the vocals are good. I think it is a very good just needs something a little more. the vocals sound a little of at the beginning of the chorus. Good work though.

C4C Please: https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=845401
#6
i think that the vocals are the best part of it, i like the piano riff and the drums and bass also, but i feel that you could add some more variety in the riffs especially maybe some crazy piano riffs would really make the song amazing.
#7
Thanks for the comments. I agree the song could use a bit more variety,but oh well. I re-mixed the song and posted it so anymore comments would be appreciated.
#8
as i listen:

starting wit hthe piano playing a 4 bar progression... nice. vox came in, i like your voice and the mixing work is nice since the vocal sits nicely... im hoping the chorus would have some kind of transisiton cause it sounds like its building up for something....

alright, it didnt go there... perhaps some more elements in the arrangement like an acoustic guitar or something is just what it needs. i really dig the motion and the speed....


the lyrics are nice and the melodie in the vox fit well... i just think it needs more... it sounds empty. also the bass needs to be a little more present in the mix.


crit me?
http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=845357
#9
Hey man, thanks for the crit. Let's see here... Piano is a bit repetitive but I like your vocals. They remind me of Frusciante. The song could use some more variation (both in instruments used and the actual music) but it flows nicely and sounds good. I couldn't hear the bass very well though so you should pull it up in the mix some.
#11
The song itself is excellent. Definitely needs guitar or something, during the chorus especially- your vocals get more powerful and the music definitely should too, or else it sounds funky. But add an instrument or two for atmosphere, and record/master it well, and it will kick ass.

Please crit mine if you get a chance https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=847203
#13
Thanks everyone, I crited you all back. Does anyone else have an opinion on the song or the other song on the myspace feel free to comment.
www.youtube.com/jordan123x