#1
yeah...I still need to work on my singing...it will come in time (i hope haha). I really love the way this one turned out on the production side, def my best one yet.

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#2
i liked it..singing wasnt too bad IMO catchy beat n stuff the piano was catchy keep it up..if you just learned this year your doin well mate
"Through every dark night there is a bright day after that so no matter how hard it gets, stick your chest out, keep your head up, and handle it."
#3
The intro is good but goes on a bit long, it would make a great soundtrack intro for a film very catchy keyboards so thumbs up there. The vocals arent too bad but theyre much too quiet

crit for crit?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=847212
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#4
minimalism, and also, i thought it was a bit short(the intro), if you thought that was long you probably just hate dance / minimal indie like LCD sound system and the field and the like.

also, i don't think the vocals are too 'quiet' because you can hear them very well over the music. if you meant something else like 'soft' or 'weak' maybe i would understand but i don't think they're too 'quiet' thats the way i felt in this song, idk i didn't feel yelling or anything.
Last edited by blackmajik2021 at Apr 27, 2008,
#5
I dont hate any type of music, but I do admit theyre not my personal preference. Either way its good stuff sorry if you thought I was offending you or something...
“I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f*ckin' mouth.” RIP
Http://www.Smash-it-up.tk
#6
no, not at all, im just saying out that for what it was it was rather short, ive listened to a ton of (good) tracks where it goes on for wayy longer than that. Its about building up anticipation. also its not really 'good' but i think its getting there

I listened to your tracks they were really good. ill leave a more detailed comment on your page.
#7
Holy **** that was a long intro. It was good and catchy but I'd shorten that intro. The singing wasn't horrible but it could definitely improve. The song was cool and the production sounded good. Good job man.
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#8
i feel like nobody here listens to any non-mainstream music (structure wise, because im sure ppl listen to indie stuff here) where the structure is unconventional.

ie > Lcd sound system, the microphones, neutral milk hotel, old modest mouse, pavement, my bloody valentin, etc

im not trying to insult your taste or anything im just saying, its a dance/ techno/ minimalist sensibility that ive tried to throw into indie. and its not quick fix pop music, its about the anticipation.
#9
You know you're probably right, I completely accept what you're going for and fair play thats you're trying to break out of structural pop confines but its just not going to appeal to everyone. For the record I listen to artists such as jarvis cocker, paul heaton, manic street preachers, stiff little fingers etc etc

Anticipation is fine but theres nothing wrong with quick fix pop.
“I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f*ckin' mouth.” RIP
Http://www.Smash-it-up.tk
#10
yeah i agree with you, i like that stuff too, its just not what im going for at the moment ( more specifically in this song) i left you a comment in another topic with a song you should check out. I was actually really inspired by seeing a live video of justice's D.A.N.C.E. where they took the intro for an extra 4 minutes or so and when it came in it drove everyone in the crowd to simultaneously jump like lunatics. that was really inspiring, although my music isint that dancy (or good haha)
Last edited by blackmajik2021 at Apr 27, 2008,
#11
cheers will definitly look it up, I love finding new things but I'm afraid ultimately I'm a pop rock fiend as you can tell by my music.
“I smoke. If this bothers anyone, I suggest you look around at the world in which we live and shut your f*ckin' mouth.” RIP
Http://www.Smash-it-up.tk
#13
There was an LCD soundsystem vibe to this, but the intro was too long. Doesn't have anything to do with the amount of time or the number of bars. Has to do with the fact that the way it built up didn't create any anticipation. There was no reason to have the bass drum come in one measure, then the hi hat or whatever come in on the next measure. Just have them both come in together. After a while it got annoying, because the payoff for listening to a whole measure was just the addition of some little thing, then you have to wait a whole other measure for some other little thing. The idea was good, but the execution needs work.
#14
hm...i agree...i think the way the breakdown worked was better than the introduction...maybe if they were both the same it would be more suitable. actually when i was making this song i was thinking about how i would present it to a live audience and i think theres definitely fault there because the extra length you add to something live doesn't really transfer well to a recording (usually)
Last edited by blackmajik2021 at Apr 27, 2008,
#15
I actually like it a lot. The vocals are a bit eh, but overall great song! I like the dual piano parts especially
Favorite Artists/Bands
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3.Moneta
#16
I like the intro, it has a feeling of motion, like its building to somthing.
The piano playing is good.

The singing isnt that bad. Pitch correction might be a good idea (look for a plug in called gsnap). Theres perhaps a tad too much reverb.

The arrangement is great. It never gets boring.
Good work!

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#17
Nice song, I listen to a bit of LCD soundsystem and enjoyed this track. Vocals arent bad but kind of hard to understand, they kind of sound like theyre faded out a bit by the music. No point in critiquing the intro. Nice track overall.