Rate it from 1-10 please .Ive always liked poetry, but was always too shy to get into it. Im 17 now. Anyway, i started writing some stuff yesterday, and while i was writing something, one of the lines didnt fit right so i took it out and created this with it. Any advice or tips you could give would be appreciated I honestly like it, but i would like some opinions too C4C?

I ****ed up so many times already, whats 1 more?
The walls are closing in (on me), i cant find the door
I start to reflect as if im never getting out
Starting to scream, starting to shout
Because i never learned what this life was about

Asking god for another way,
Beggin, not here not now... (please) not today
But he cant hear me now, no one can
Its like im buried 200 feet under, locked in under the sand
In this tomb, forever ill lay here cryin
My bodies immortality is the only thing that keeps me from physically dieng
Being so strong on the outside is my only curse
Because it leaves room on the inside to feel all the more worse.
And the key only she holds is universal,
But shes using it on someone else, like one of those cliche commercials
Hit the fastforward button because the show was pretaped
While youre counting your blessings that this **** isnt your mistake.

On the inside im torn up and burnt out,
Asking god for answers is when i find out what hes all about.
Hes creeping out the backdoor, sneaking his way out
Leaving me alone without any help
The walls get closer, and i start to lose my breathe
I need to find my way out of here, in what little time is left.

In this tomb, forever ill lay cryin
My bodies immortality is the only thing that keeps me from physically dieng
And only she holds the key, im not lien
Gods staring down watching me, he knows ive been tryin
But he mocks every move i make
And laughs at the blows i take
While leaving no advice for me to give or take

In the perfect world my door would unlock
But this isnt the perfect world,
and so shes left me here, trapped in her shoebox.
Quote by gu1t4rh3r0
One of my friends said to the principle once,
"NO! The voices tell me not to talk to you!" *Runs away on all fours*
The principle eventually caught up to him and gave him a drug test.
Last edited by Pr3vieWX360 at May 6, 2008,