#1
Okay, heres a newish song, let me know what you think.
Myspace


Day Two
By Aaron Zimmerman
Copyright 2008

It's the end of day two
That I spent with you
And we are alone now…
And the movie just plays on
But my mind is gone
It's focused on your sound

And every breath that you take
Every move that you make
I wonder if it's real...
Then the moment arrives
Like the coming of the tide
And you tell me how you feel

Oh, I feel my heart rise
And my mouth, it dries
My stomach turns
And my soul, it yearns
Just to hold you, just to touch you
Just to feel you!
Next to me

The movie has ended
But we're still sending
These signals through the air...
It's only you and I
There's no reason to ask why
When the moment is right here

When I feel my heart rise
And my mouth, it dries
My stomach turns
And my soul, it yearns
Just to hold you, just to touch you
Just to feel you!
Next to me

Bridge:
But where do we go from here
When the moment I fear
Is inching ever so close
Where we bid our goodbyes
And our sweet good nights
Wishing for just one more dose

So I can feel my heart rise
And my mouth, it dries
My stomach turns
And my soul it yearns
Just to hold you, just to touch you
Just to feel you!
Next to me

It's the end of day two
That I spent with you
And we are alone now…
#2
no offense, its great that you wrote a song... but the lyrics are really unimaginative, uninteresting, and not only that that--theyre completely cliche. same goes for the playing.

and you might want to brush up a bit on the vocals... and by that i mean hitting the notes better and working on your articulation.