#1
I edited it from last time (to those who heard it before). I made it longer and a bit more fun to listen to. Still no solo but that was my intent. Very technical riffs though.

Please crit
Attachments:
dark prog 2.zip
Last edited by dervishguitar at May 12, 2008,
#4
I like the bass intro...

then the riff there is really simple, but it delivers the goods. The drumming is atmospheric, the sweeping makes it sound very evil. I couldn't help but headbang...to a MIDI track. When it moved into the weird timed riff that sound somewhat similar, and then to the techish riff, I really got into it. Sounded like a Necrophagist song but dumbed down.

By the way, the dumbed down part is not an insult.

Then the breakdown like riff around the 2 minute mark was ace, sounded very good. The rest of the song is great too, but the first two and a half minutes were the best part.
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Last edited by Slaytanic1993 at May 11, 2008,
#5
That was pretty cool man. All the lead guitar work was really cool and it seems everything was thought out really well. The chuggy part had a bunch of weird time signatures but never lost its flow so good job on that. The bass was really cool in the parts with just bass. All the riffs were really cool, but for some reason I don't like that verse riff that is also at the end of the song, don't know why I don't. The hard rock riff was pretty cool, I was surprised for a second when it first came in, and the ending was unexpected but really cool.

8.5/10
#6
First off, don't bump your thread. It's somewhat against the rules, it's not fair to to other people, you're sounding whiney, etc. etc.

The song itself: well, you certainly know your stuff, and it's without a doubt progressive. For the most part I enjoyed it thoroughly, especially the first half. There was a definite groove, and some parts were heavy, others melodic, and others just flat out "what the hell?" ( ie, the "random" parts). I really like your use of time signatures, and the inclusion of the sweeps as well. The drumming was, for the most part, great.

However, I personally think you milked the whole "chug 'n' stop" theme a bit too much. The "chug" section dragged on for ages, it seemed like. The section starting at 111 just didn't fit the whole dark theme of the song, either; it seemed like it was just thrown in there, but unlike the other "thrown in" parts, this just really didn't fit.

On the whole, it's a great song, very proggy. 8.5/10 for sure.




Crit mine?:https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=835965
#7
good:

cool groovy riff
pretty technical riffs
sweet sweeping harmonies

bad
too long of a chuggy part
not a big prog fan

overall, it was cool. not a prog fan so i won't give it a rating. theres lots of effort and i'm sure prog fans will love it. i did love the diminished harmomies and such(the sweeping)
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#8
Quote by Broadsword
First off, don't bump your thread. It's somewhat against the rules, it's not fair to to other people, you're sounding whiney, etc. etc.

The song itself: well, you certainly know your stuff, and it's without a doubt progressive. For the most part I enjoyed it thoroughly, especially the first half. There was a definite groove, and some parts were heavy, others melodic, and others just flat out "what the hell?" ( ie, the "random" parts). I really like your use of time signatures, and the inclusion of the sweeps as well. The drumming was, for the most part, great.

However, I personally think you milked the whole "chug 'n' stop" theme a bit too much. The "chug" section dragged on for ages, it seemed like. The section starting at 111 just didn't fit the whole dark theme of the song, either; it seemed like it was just thrown in there, but unlike the other "thrown in" parts, this just really didn't fit.

On the whole, it's a great song, very proggy. 8.5/10 for sure.




Crit mine?:https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=835965


I'm sorry for bumping but it had been five hours and no response, so I had no choice and reposting would have made you guys mad.

As for the length of the chuggy part, it will have lyrics to cancel out the boredom of it. You can't really put a singer on Guitar Pro
#11
Overall, really good job. All the verses were really good, and the song was amazing. Until the chug part. The Chug needs to be shortened massively, cause I honestly didnt like it. It's sad cause the rest of the song was perfect.
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#12
i really liked this at first as I write progressive metal myself , but I think there are a few things that could get improved:

first of all this piece sounds very very hectic to me , maybe you could rearrange the structure to get it more easy to identify with the certain parts of the song like for example verse , and maybe as mentioned before you could change the drums in a few parts to something more simple , I also have to admit I don't like the chuggy part at all , and also the riffs are kind of very repitive after some time , and also there are no i call them ' relaxing ' parts in there , it's just hammerin on you all the time and after a time it gets hard to listen to it , maybe you could just add some chord progression to it would be nice I think, now thats the negative aspects i saw in there , now the positive ones:

I really like your use of time signatures , it makes the music sound very unique , I'd be interested which bands you would consider to be most influencing on you , also i love the epic drum outro and the random/loud again part , maybe you could use more piano in this piece i think it would add another kind of sound .. also i like the guitar harmonics in the diminished arpeggio part , sounds really nice ...

thats about it , i like to listen at it at first but after a time it gets .. difficult
i think it still needs some work but it bears a lot of potential , also you could maybe change some of the transitions

7,5 / 10

Please also crit my new Progressive Metal Intro


Greymane
#13
holy **** that was awesome. totally felt the dream theater vibe in that piece. i agree that there are too much chug riffs, if you would replace or shorten those then this could really turn into something great
#15
it was pretty darn awesome, man...
the intro had a great groove... really enticed me into listening to the rest of the song... loved the time signature changes in the verses...
i would say the quick verse was one of my favourite parts of the song... loved the technicality...
the thing that competely did it for me though was the piano bit.. i'd recommend lengthening that and shortening the chuggy thing at the end.. that was a bit too long in my opinion..
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#16
Fee, fie, fo, fum, I hear the work of a true progsman! Do I sense a DT fan?

Anyways, this was completely awesome, seeing as I'm a huge fan of prog. The piano parts and the arpeggios especially impressed me. The riffage was nice also.

Check out some of my posts!

9.5/10 Overall! Very nice work!
#17
This is awesome, kick ass man.
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