#1
Rip My Heart Out And Leave A Clean Slate
I'm Surprised We Could Even Relate

A Cold Night, I Was Walking
Thinking About You The Whole Way
Me And My Friends We Were Talking
Never Thought You'd Leave Me This Way

Its So Strange, How A Moment Passes By
Without you, Its Untrue

Now Your With That Other Guy
And I'm Still Pondering Suicide
Told Me If Weren't together, All You'd Do Was Sit And Cry
Wishing Right Now You Where By My Side

Fell Quick, And Hard
For You From The Start
At First It Was Weed And Beers
Now I Cant Believe Were Apart

You Came In, And Drove
My Life
Now I'm Trying Cope With Resolve
Our Life

Said Id Never Leave
You Said The Same
And I Even Believed You

But Now I'm Here
Sad And Alone
While I Drown In Beer

And I Miss You More Than Ever
You Where As Much Of Me As Myself
The Consequences Are Sever

Your Out, Having Fun
I'm Inside Missing you
Cant Figure Out If I Should Pull The Trigger on my gun
For You
Only You
#2
not bad but waaay to many words at some parts, and a few forced rhymes.
could have been a little smoother

Crit 1 of mine? it's still on frnt page
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Mr.Cuddles killed The Metal!!!! FUCK YES!

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Mr Cuddles pretty much nailed it...

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"Oh Mr.Cuddles, you make my pants go boom boom. I are horny. Do not disappoint I"


Viscara (my band)