#1
I found this in the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel this afternoon, and literally laughed until I cried. Read it all the way through; the LOLs don't stop until it's over.

HOLYHEAD, Wales - A man who dressed up as Darth Vader, wearing a garbage bag for a cape, and assaulted the founders of a group calling itself the Jedi church was given a suspended sentence Tuesday.

Arwel Wynne Hughes, 27, attacked Jedi church founder Barney Jones — aka Master Jonba Hehol — with a metal crutch, hitting him on the head, prosecutors told Holyhead Magistrates' Court.

He also whacked Jones' 18-year-old cousin, Michael Jones — known as Master Mormi Hehol — bruising his thigh in the March 25 incident, prosecutors said.

The two cousins and Barney Jones' brother, Daniel, set up the Church of Jediism, Anglesey order, last year. Jedi is the faith followed by some of the central characters in the "Star Wars" films.

The group, which claims about 30 members, says on its Web site that it uses "insight and knowledge" from the films as "a guide to living a better and more worthwhile life."

"We all love the films and what they stand for. Obviously some people are going to laugh about it," the Wales on Sunday newspaper quoted Barney Jones as saying last month. "But a lot of people do take it seriously."

Unfortunately for Hughes, his March attack was recorded on a video camera that the cousins had set up to film themselves in a light saber battle.

"Darth Vader! Jedis!" Hughes shouted as he approached.

Hughes claimed he couldn't remember the incident, having drunk the better part of a 2 1/2-gallon (10-liter) box of wine beforehand.

"He knows his behavior was wrong and didn't want it to happen but he has no recollection of it," said Hughes' lawyer, Frances Jones.

District Judge Andrew Shaw sentenced Hughes to two months in jail but suspended the sentence for one year. He also ordered Hughes to pay $195 to each of his victims and $117 in court costs.

In the 2001 United Kingdom census, 390,000 — 0.7 percent of the population — listed Jedi as their religion.


Link to the AP story:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080514/ap_on_fe_st/odd_britain_vader_raider_4
Death to Ovation haters!
#2
"0.7 percent of the population — listed Jedi as their religion." this is ridiculous...are people really this dumb?
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ty
#3
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You should be careful what you say. Some asshole will probably sig it.

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#9
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The search bar laughs at you.

I used the search bar.
Death to Ovation haters!
#10
lol nice find
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#11
.7 percent seems pretty high
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#12
"Unfortunately for Hughes, his March attack was recorded on a video camera that the cousins had set up to film themselves in a light saber battle."

LMAO WHAT?!

I would kill to see that video...
#13
They did it as a joke to get it as an official UK religion.
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+1
#16
Quote by ++BuCkEtHeAd++
"0.7 percent of the population — listed Jedi as their religion." this is ridiculous...are people really this dumb?

It's called humour - and you don't have it.
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Psh. I can can play fleshlight acoustically.

*masturbates*
#18
The sad thing is, I knew what this was before I opened it...

I love this story, though. Gets me every time.
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Forget about her, she seems complicated. Who wants a girl who answers in riddles? I'm not the fucking sfinx.

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Woah, woah. Back the hell up.

Polo shirt?

Sunglasses?

Of course he got all the girls, he's Rick Astley.
#19
Quote by John W
It's called humour - and you don't have it.

I didn't know they did it as a joke so eat a penis sandwich
Quote by leonardo.kornuto
You're pretty

ty
#20
Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to gooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
I didn't know trhere was actually a religion existing!!!!
I'm an atheist, but a religion created in a science fiction film by George Lucas, MUST be the answer!!!!!!!!!

Wankers!!!!!

They should be named the Lolwuts!!!!!!!

I would have attacked them too had i known......

And, hell... i love Starwars.........
Every form of control over another person is a crime

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#21
Quote by KenMasters
Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to gooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
I didn't know trhere was actually a religion existing!!!!
I'm an atheist, but a religion created in a science fiction film by George Lucas, MUST be the answer!!!!!!!!!

Wankers!!!!!

They should be named the Lolwuts!!!!!!!

I would have attacked them too had i known......

And, hell... i love Starwars.........


And there was me thinking the exclamation mark was going extinct...
#23
Quote by ++BuCkEtHeAd++
I didn't know they did it as a joke so eat a penis sandwich

What? You ****in thought it was serious? That tens of thousands of people believe you can levitate things with your mind? Eat a dick buffet.
Quote by -BlackZeppelin-
Psh. I can can play fleshlight acoustically.

*masturbates*
#24
Quote by ++BuCkEtHeAd++
"0.7 percent of the population — listed Jedi as their religion." this is ridiculous...are people really this dumb?


No, we have a sense of humour.
A dwarf might hear you. What then?

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#26
Quote by Minkaro
I'd hope that most of them just did it for a laugh.

That's quite funny. I'd do it.
#27
That is just like a Sith to walk into a den of Jedi pansies,and start whuppin ass.
#28
Quote by ++BuCkEtHeAd++
"0.7 percent of the population — listed Jedi as their religion." this is ridiculous...are people really this dumb?

My two cousins did this.
And then proceeded to buy Handmade light sabers.
£140 each. Very well made though, not that they'll cut anything.

I want one...
#29
Quote by KenMasters
Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to gooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
I didn't know trhere was actually a religion existing!!!!
I'm an atheist, but a religion created in a science fiction film by George Lucas, MUST be the answer!!!!!!!!!

Wankers!!!!!

They should be named the Lolwuts!!!!!!!

I would have attacked them too had i known......

And, hell... i love Starwars.........


Yes, because Science-Fiction hasn't already spawned a religion that's pointless. I'd refer to them by name but I'll get sued.
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#30
Quote by TheFishMan92
Yes, because Science-Fiction hasn't already spawned a religion that's pointless. I'd refer to them by name but I'll get sued.

The Church of the Flying Spaghetti monster!
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#31
1. Write spurious book.
2. Sell to idiots
3. ???????
4. Profit

^^
Clue...
Quote by LgLagro
You, you bring us both corm, and two hot russian gymnasts pretty much making out, you are a legend.


Limping Head Journalist and Proprietor of PitTown Cricket Club.

Keeping quiet about scandals since 2008.
#32
that's hilarious
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ololololololol


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