#1
Born Within

With the many faces of our souls
Scattered amongst the sand and stones
Forlorn leaves fallen
Swept away by changing seasons
I build my walls high and perilous
Shelter from shadows born within
For they have driven me from the shade
To far beyond a shallow sullen grave

Like a child taken from his mothers womb
Waiting, wishing for a warm embrace
The world I've created becomes my tomb
Barren wasteland greets my stare
The ashes of my ruins poison the air
Sleeping upon cold hard stones
I wake to find an empty home
Wandering upon sleepless shores
Where once flowed the river of our soul

Crit for Crit, just remember to post your links.
#2
wow, this is really good man.

i cant really pick anything bad out in it, to be honest.

although, the part The ashes of my ruins poison the air
Sleeping upon cold hard stones
I wake to find an empty home
Wandering upon sleepless shores
Where once flowed the river of our soul , the dominant thought here to me, is that first your dead, then your not? or do you mean, it was all a dream, of despair?