#1
Updated June 11! This still isn't done, but I have added on and made some adjustments. C4C


Your words decimate me, Why, Why? How can this be?


Tears turn to anger, anger turns to hate.

Here comes another breakdown, hold it back;

Oh god it's too late.


(Chorus)

Suffocate

asphyxiate

You will be your own your own demise.


I'm riding the trigger, tears streaming from my eyes.

Seconds away from snapping, sick of all the lies.

So desolate, so lonely, no one hears my cries.


(Chorus)


Flipping through emotions

Caught up in the stream

I'm begging for you to answer

Can't you hear me scream?


You comfort me with a falsity,

It satisfies my needs

I'm sacrificing truth, for my own sanity.


(Chorus)
Last edited by shredder2be93 at Jun 11, 2008,
#2
Quote by shredder2be93
So this is a work in progress, but I would love to receive some crit. C4C


Your words decimate me, Why, Why? How can this be?

Another tie severed, Once more, a close one lost.



Tears turn to anger, anger turns to hate.

Here comes another breakdown, hold it back;

Oh god it's too late.

I dig this part.


(chorus)


What appeared to be perfection, was merely a disguise

What used to be affection, is now despise


Despise doesn't really work here.

(verse)

Suffocate

asphyxiate

You will be your own your own demise.



I like the lyrics except for the one bolded part. I think it would make a cool song, nice job.
On the eight day we spoke back...

let there be sound.
#3
Quote by Billyjson
I like the lyrics except for the one bolded part. I think it would make a cool song, nice job.

Idea: change "is now despise" to "I now despise", since despise isn't really an adjective.

I would suggest adding more, this song would probably take up a minute at most...

Take a look at my lyrics and tell me what you think: Infected
#4
Quote by -Blue-
Idea: change "is now despise" to "I now despise", since despise isn't really an adjective.

I would suggest adding more, this song would probably take up a minute at most...

Take a look at my lyrics and tell me what you think: Infected



I agree, therefor theres really not much else to say.