#1
So I got tired of playing guitar/lurking in the pit and decided to go to the supermarket to hunt down some edibles. After browsing the aisles I discovered the 'Santa Maria tex mex taco kit'. I thought

-'Oh yea!, this is like little chemist but with tacos'

Filled with confidence I walked briskly up to the cashier and threw in a packet of gum just to have something other then my exciting taco kit (don’t you find it awkward when you buy just one item from the supermarket??). At the cashier I silently loled as a Polish man frantically tried to coax a plastic bucket from the hapless cashier.

-'Wiadro, wiadro, Plastic wiadro. Ma pani plastic wiadro??!'

I probably should have helped the poor guy but he smelled funny and I still only had two things in my basket. I got a plastic bag and probably killed a tree by doing so but hell; this was a special occasion, a fekkin taco kit!

On the way home I mouthed wanker at the asshole on his skateboard and smiled at the chick at the bus stop, she smiled back. Soon I was slipping the key into the door and taking the stairs, two at a time, the excitement was at boiling point. Stopping only to turn the volume up on the stereo, giggling slightly as 'venus in furs' came on, cuz I'm mature like that!

Then I was in the kitchen carefully prising open the tab that said 'carefully prise here' and lo and behold! 12 taco shells, a jar of mild taco sauce and a Santa Maria tex mex sauce, needless to say I was overjoyed!

Suddenly I sensed something was wrong, yes, the taco instruction manual was written in a choice of Finnish, Danish and Swedish, damn you Scandinavians!! I ran the coded instructions through Babel fish which told me that I had to;

lazily thread my meat through the water on a cold moonless night under an oak tree wearing a possum hat.


Upon opening the little packet that contained my Santa Maria tax mex sauce and mixing with water just as the strange little box told me to I achieved a brown, runny substance unlike anything you would wish to insert into a taco and no vegetables either.


Summary: I went to the store bought tacos and couldn’t actually make them. Moral not included.
Last edited by coca_cola at May 23, 2008,
#5
Quote by Paper Snowman
The Babel fish translation seemes fake.


thats what i thought
#12
i think you're supposed to add hamburger to your tex-mex seasoning....

just a thought.
UG POKER!
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#16
wow, how hard can it be to make a couple tacos from a taco kit without instructions??
#19
Quote by confusius
There is a painful typo in the last line. Needs more character development.





uh oh, I cant find the typo, and I liked my lat line, am I turning into a grammatical mongoloid??

Workin' on the character, next installments will be better, I promise.
#20
Quote by coca_cola
Lazily thread my meat through the water on a cold moonless night under an oak tree wearing a possum hat.


Upon opening the little packet that contained my Santa Maria tex mex sauce and mixing with water just as the strange little box told me to i achieved a brown, runny substance unlike anything you would wish to insert into a taco, and now vegetables either.

You need to get a new possum hat and the night was probably not cold and moonless enough
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#21
and now vegetables either.


couldant



Those two were the most painful. The character bit was, unfortunately for you, sarcasm.


#22
Quote by coca_cola
i silently loled


fukken sigged
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#23
Quote by coca_cola
I probably should have helped the poor guy but he smelled funny and i still only had two things in my basket. I got a plastic bag and probably killed a tree by doing so but hell, this was a special occasion, a fekkin taco kit!

O rly?
I can't remember the last time I had tacos. Now I want some.
#24
Quote by confusius
Those two were the most painful. The character bit was, unfortunately for you, sarcasm.





ouch!, sorry bout that.

EDIT: ran it through word, spelling and grammar and all.
Last edited by coca_cola at May 23, 2008,