Allright i'm gonna write a stroy then you "lol" at it and write another one xD

There I was in the depths of the gorcery store hunting the dirt on the floor with my trusty "Super Mop" and "Endless Water Supply Mop Bucket" when all of the sudden a Pickle Jar fell from the shelf with a nasty crack of broken glass the pickle jar shattered, leaving attacking peices of glass everywhere, and pickle monsters on the ground spraying there acidic juices everywhere.

None the less i was scared for my life at this point, because there wasn't much i could do with my "Super Mop" except for clean the acidic juices up with it. But, before I could do that I had to get rid of the nasty attacking glass and the Pickle Monsters.

So I went to the back room to grab some rubber gloves so I could pick up the pickles without my hands being burned, I threw the Pickle Monsters into the "Garbage of Death" where they started writhing in pain of death. I let them be where they were in the "Garbage of Death" and went back to the attacking glass shards, they seemed to be laying dormant at the moment so I used the oppurtunity to clean them up. The out of nowhere lighting fast a glass shard came and attacked my pinky latching on to my skin, I had to run back to the back room and get them out of my finger before they bored themselves in farther in. I them ripped them out put on some band-aids and then walked up to clean up the "Pickle Monsters" acid with my trusty "Super Mop".

After this was done i finished hunting the dirt and went home for the night.

The End
i dont understand a f*cking f*ck. Is your story supossed to be funny? Well, it isnt

i think this thread is equal to pure fail.

John Freeman who was Gordon Freemans brother was one day in an office typing on a computer. He got an email from his brother that said that aliens and monsters were attacking his place and aksed him for help so he went.

John Freeman got his computer shut down and wet on the platform to go up to the roof of the building where he left his motorcycle and normal people close because he was in his office lab coat. John Freeman got on his motorcycl and said "its time for me to live up to my family name and face full life consequences" so he had to go.

John Freeman ramped off the building and did a backflip and landed. He kept driving down the road and made sure there was no zombies around because he ddint have weapon.

The contrysides were nice and the plants were singing and the birds and the sun was almost down from the top of the sky. the mood was set for John Freemans quest to help his brother where he was. John Freeman looked around the countrysides and said "its a good day to do what has to be done by me and help my brother to defeat the enemys".

John Freeman was late so he had to drive really fast. A cop car was hiden near by so when John Freeman went by the cops came and wanted to give him a ticket. Here John Freeman saw the first monster because the cop was posessed and had headcrabs.

"I cant give you my lisense officer" John Freeman said

"Why not?" said the headcrab oficer back to John Freeman.

"Because you are headcrab zombie" so John Freeman shot the oficer in the head and drove off thinking "my brother is in trouble there" and went faster.

John Freeman had to go faster like the speed of sound and got there fast because Gordon needed him where he was. John Freeman looked at road signs and saw "Ravenholm" with someons writing under it saying "u shudnt come here" so John Freeman almost turned around but heard screaming like Gordon so he went faster again.

John Freeman drove in and did another flip n jumped off his motorbike and the motor bike took out some headcrab zombies infront of John Freeman. John Freeman smiled and walked fast. John Freeman then looked on the ground and found wepon so he pickd it up and fired fast at zombie goasts in front of a house.

John Freeman said "Zombie goasts leave this place" and the zombie goasts said "but this is our house" and John Freeman felt sorry for them becaus they couldnt live there anymore because they were zombie goasts so he blew up the house and killed the zombie goasts so they were at piece.

Then John Freeman herd another scream from his brother so he kept walking really faster to get where he was. Ravenholdm was nothing like the countrysides there was no birds singing and the pants were dead and teh dirt was messy and bloody from headcrabs.

When John Freeman got to where the screaming was started from he found his brother Gorden Freeman fightin the final bosss and Gordon said "John Freeman! Over here!" so John Freeman went there to where Gordon Freeman was fighting. John Freeman fired his bullet from teh gun really fast and the bullets went and shot the final boss in the eyes and the final boss couldnt see.

Gordon Freeman said "its time to end this ones and for all!" and punched the final boss in the face and the final boss fell. John Freeman said "thanks i could help, bro" and Gordon Freeman said "you should come here earlier next time" and they laughed.

The laughed overed quickly though because John Freeman yelled "LOOK OUT BRO!" and pointed up to the top of the sky. Gordon Freeman looked up and said "NOO! John Freeman run out of here fast as you can!" and John Freeman walked real fast out.

John Freeman loked back and saw Gordon get steppd on by the next boss and he was mad and angry.

"I'll get you back evil boss!" John Freeman yelled at the top of lungs.

to be continued..?

an e-cookie for the reference
Quote by fleajr_1412
You have amazing taste in men.

Are You a PROG-HEAD? I am.
Quote by deanfreak93
I made a vulgar thrust and she immediately proceeded to give a BJ to me.

The end

You have to be the best writer in the history of writers...
yesterday in gym class i was playing soccer in a tennis court. i was against the fence surrounding it and some guy tackled me into one of the poles and there was a metal shard sticking out of the pole and it cut a gash into my chest. now i have 5 stitches in my chest and well it hurt...

wait, where we supposed to make something up?
meh. that was my yesterday...
In his house at R'lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming.

║  ██ ║
║╬  •• ║
Quote by andy331
You have to be the best writer in the history of writers...

Ya well it aint easy. You know how many c o*c*k* pushups I had to do to get that type of creative writing skill.
Quote by deanfreak93
Ya well it aint easy. You know how many c o*c*k* pushups I had to do to get that type of creative writing skill.

dude can you even do one **** push up? cause i can't
Not quite Shakespeare...
Hull City A.F.C

Quote by Thrashtastic15
crunkym toy diuckl;ess ass ****igkjn ****** **** bitch ass pussy ****er douchecanoe ****** **** you s omn cnt you lieet le biutch
Quote by andy331
dude can you even do one **** push up? cause i can't

uhh uhh (sweats nervously) Yes
Quote by _InsanitY_


ur sig always gets my attention, and then i read on and do a facepalm.
must have been 7 time now!


Jackson performer (miJ)
Cort Earth 700
roland cube 15
Behringer Wah
Boss rc-2 loop station

Dutch Power!!

Quote by DieGarbageMan
Proffesser Oak : I Came when i heard you beat the elite four