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#1
http://wiki.hessian.org/index.php?title=Main_Page

Where did these people get their nerve?

They know next to fuck all about metal, and they try to relate it to some faggot emo movement that they made up. All the while being the most pretentious little wimps I've ever seen on the internet.
O what a disgrace if such a despised and base race, which worships demons, should conquer a people which has the faith of omnipotent God and is made glorious with the name of Christ!

The music winners listen to
#5
Quote by insideac
Im reading the list of "greats" and wondering wtf youre going on about..


Read what they say about bands, genres and 'Hessian'
O what a disgrace if such a despised and base race, which worships demons, should conquer a people which has the faith of omnipotent God and is made glorious with the name of Christ!

The music winners listen to
#7
""Thrash metal" is a common misnomer for speed metal, a subgenre of metal music."

NO.


Ah, ANUS. You can always rely on them to bring you the very finest in meaningless, pretentious wank.
#9
That's so appalling, I don't even fully understand what it is.

Is it a joke? Is it one of those self-satirical jabs? Is it plain trolling? Is it for real? I honestly can't tell.
#10
'Hessians, or metalheads, headbangers, threshers, heshers, rivetheads, metallians and longhairs, are a cultural resistance movement founded in the industrial West upon the idea that our flight in fear from the coarser aspects of nature leads us to a spiritless existence, and that only heavy metal music can restore our spirit and thus existential enjoyment of life.'

Whoever wrote this is a comedy legend.
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#12
Wow, I just read the ATG page.

Quote by Some Pretentious Dick and/or Pisstaker
The band's later works were, as a result, recombinations of the known in which the familiar rhythmic patterns of speed metal and the simple tonal harmonies of heavy metal were modestly ornamented by rigidly formalized (and formulaic) renditions of At the Gates' 'trademark' melodies. Though this formula brought At the Gates considerable mainstream acclaim and success (and served as a template for legions of Gothenburg and metalcore bands to follow), the basic hollowness of the approach is immediately apparent to the discerning listener, and the breakup of the band following the release of Slaughter of the Soul could perhaps be best understood as a mercy killing.


No bias there eh.
LAMMERGEIER
Disclaimer: Dyer's Eve can not be held responsible for the loss of time spent or the insult to your aural senses as a result of exploring this link
#13
Quote by some pillock on Gorguts
Gorguts' musical career began in modesty with the release of Considered Dead in 1991; though its compositional aspects are strong and showed signs of uniqueness in its riffcraft and vocal delivery, it is, for the most part, fairly typical of other death metal albums from the time. However, by the release of The Erosion of Sanity in 1993, Gorguts' musical vision begins to trail off into uncharted territory: the guitar playing on this album uses techniques like palm-muting, pinch-harmonics and tremolo-picking in ways that no previous death metal band had thought to, resulting in melodies whose shape and direction could be compared to the makeup of a crooked tree; drums too, are choppy yet precise, staying fairly consistent in their speed while creating patterns that maintain a similar sense of architecture which, although twisted, remains full of logic, direction, and purpose.



#14
At least you know these dudes did well at English during their High School years

Metaphors, similes, and adjectives for the WIN! I mean come on man!
#15
Quote by Monkey_Bassist
It's *almost* like a Neo-Nazi rant, but funnier


lol, especially with that line on manual labour hah

“Who are you then?.."
"- I am part of that power which eternally wills evil and eternally works good.”
KULTURKAMPF
lastFM
#16
When you talk to normals


Jesus, I nearly died of laughter when I read that.
LAMMERGEIER
Disclaimer: Dyer's Eve can not be held responsible for the loss of time spent or the insult to your aural senses as a result of exploring this link
#19
I can't honestly see this as being serious. Surely no-one can stick their head this far up their arse. Has to be a joke.
LAMMERGEIER
Disclaimer: Dyer's Eve can not be held responsible for the loss of time spent or the insult to your aural senses as a result of exploring this link
#21
Nah this cant be serious...

'There are more fans of underground metal in the UK than one can properly guess; spotting such a fan and trying to cajole them into progressing the Metal community in the UK seems impossible. If it was possible then there would be quite a large mass of people that could potentially have a very loud voice, as is needed to progress Hessianism.'
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#22
about Metallica:
By the end of the 80s, the band was well known for it's ability to create "rock" music without it having any connection to blues or African music of any kind.


Have they ever even listened to Kill 'Em All?
I’m not the man I used to be, I... I can’t go back to Arkham.

I... I should return to Arkham.


Among the churchyard’s mouldering stones I recognise a name – my own.
I have come home to Arkham.

#24
I fail to see the humor in this.

The behavior of metal-heads at this site is far more embarrassing the way I see it... and no I'm not trying to fellate anus.com either.
#25
^ Explain.

Are you honestly trying to say that this site is worse than the retarded, isolated, thesarus-worshipping fantasy world of ANUS.com?
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#26
Quote by Stranglehold
^ Explain.

Are you honestly trying to say that this site is worse than the retarded, isolated, thesarus-worshipping fantasy world of ANUS.com?


Not the site in general, but some of the site's users.

I'd rather go to a sanctimonious, pretense-ridden site which advocates good music (not that I do) than go to a site which advocates pseudo-avant garde metal and asinine tech-death.
#27
Off with you then, theres a good lad.

Every site has its fair share of different metal tastes, why not make a thread here about a band that you like, or revive a thread? Sitting on your high horse isnt going to do much.
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#28
Quote by Budd_Dwyer
I'd rather go to a sanctimonious, pretense-ridden site which advocates good music (not that I do) than go to a site which advocates pseudo-avant garde metal and asinine tech-death.


Who are you to say we don't advocate good music and all we're into is "pseudo-avant garde and asinine tech death"? People have different tastes dude. If you don't like it, why're you here?
#29
Quote by Stranglehold


Every site has its fair share of different metal tastes, why not make a thread here about a band that you like, or revive a thread? Sitting on your high horse isnt going to do much.


As I said. The site collectively tends to favor crap over music which I like (which is objectively much better than anything you like.) Therefore bumping threads do very little good because most users at this site would rather rave about the latest polka-blackened deathcore band or obscure "technical death metal" band.

and... no I don't frequent this site that much anymore nor do I plan to very much in the future. I just thought I'd put in my 2 cents.

(and no this message wasn't directed to anyone in particular, so don't get upset because you felt that I was being condescending.)

Quote by Chugaroo
Who are you to say we don't advocate good music and all we're into is "pseudo-avant garde and asinine tech death"? People have different tastes dude. If you don't like it, why're you here?

Your question is answered in the text above.
#30
Ah no...my weak spot.. my inferior music taste!

Seriously lad, head over to your buddies at ANUS if you really are sick of this place. Arguing that your music is better than the music taste of this forum as a whole is pretty pointless, and your attempts to be an e-badass seem to have failed.
Quote by Ultraussie
I want to try that while playing the opening riff to "Tempting Time".

0-0-0-13-0-0-0-0-13 or something like that alalalala but It;s so heavy and off time and awesome and you could not f**k anyone to it.


Quote by Ingested
burzum IS nazi. well, varg is.
#31
Quote by Stranglehold
Ah no...my weak spot.. my inferior music taste!

Seriously lad, head over to your buddies at ANUS if you really are sick of this place. Arguing that your music is better than the music taste of this forum as a whole is pretty pointless, and your attempts to be an e-badass seem to have failed.


+1
#32
Quote by Budd_Dwyer
As I said. The site collectively tends to favor crap over music which I like (which is objectively much better than anything you like.) Therefore bumping threads do very little good because most users at this site would rather rave about the latest polka-blackened deathcore band or obscure "technical death metal" band.

and... no I don't frequent this site that much anymore nor do I plan to very much in the future. I just thought I'd put in my 2 cents.

(and no this message wasn't directed to anyone in particular, so don't get upset because you felt that I was being condescending.)


Your question is answered in the text above.



just..





Ever heard of 'open-mindedness'?
#33
F.y.i. The statement about my taste being "objectively better" than yours was sarcastic.

and your attempts to be an e-badass


What?
#34
You don't know this forum very well do you.
Our biggest threads are Metallica, Iron Maiden, Opeth and Children of Bodom.
Most of the recs are for music that isn't that obscure.
And 99% of smaller band threads get under 30 replies then disappear into the abyss.

At least we don't feel the need to rape a thesaurus everytime we want to say we like or dislike something.

As a forum, we will reccomend what we like. There are some users in here who will yes, promote strange avant-garde music and there are also some who will promote nothing but old school death metal. Does that really differentiate us from, oh say... society in general?
People listen to what they want to, they reccomend music they like to people who ask for reccomendations. If you really think this forum is filled with wankers who only promote the most obscure and underground music, then you either have an amazingly limited knowledge of metal that doesn't extend beyond anyone who has released an album before 2000 or, you're talking about things you simply don't understand because you aren't around enough to pick them up.

Personally, I think it's both.
#36
Quote by rush4life
I thought this site was well known...

It's clearly a joke though, considering what a Hessian is.

Are you down playing OUR Hessian-ness???
#37
Yeah, great...

On the band Death...

"Death was a metal band, formed by guitarist Chuck Schuldiner, who began their career in 1983 as Mantas. Due to Schuldiner's desire to make death metal a more melodic and approachable commodity, the band gradually mutated their sound into something that more-closely resembled the music of heavy metal bands like King Diamond and Judas Priest, only with harsh, screamed vocals".

Just...how the fuck does it enter your mind that this is in any way good or accurate? This is all they have on them!
'Thine Eyes Bleed':

Quote by CSguitarvocal
More like... Thine Butthole Bleeds... from all the gay sex you have!!! Ahahaha!



Quote by Butt Rayge
Fuck off already, you fucking faggot fuck.

amidoinitrite?



Quote by DeAd-RiP
I don't care for slipknot unless I'm so drunk I don't care about anything.
#38
Quote by Magero
You don't know this forum very well do you.
Our biggest threads are Metallica, Iron Maiden, Opeth and Children of Bodom.
Most of the recs are for music that isn't that obscure.
And 99% of smaller band threads get under 30 replies then disappear into the abyss.

This is a blatant straw man argument. Of course those threads are always going to draw in a large crowd, I didn't argue against that. I merely stated that it seems that a lot of users here often neglect classic bands in favor of the newest banal tech death band.

Quote by Magero
At least we don't feel the need to rape a thesaurus everytime we want to say we like or dislike something.


I didn't deny the fact that there are a lot of pretentious pseudo-intellectuals at anus. I just said they had good taste and that one could find better music at that site.

Quote by Magero
As a forum, we will reccomend what we like. There are some users in here who will yes, promote strange avant-garde music and there are also some who will promote nothing but old school death metal. Does that really differentiate us from, oh say... society in general?
People listen to what they want to, they reccomend music they like to people who ask for reccomendations. If you really think this forum is filled with wankers who only promote the most obscure and underground music, then you either have an amazingly limited knowledge of metal that doesn't extend beyond anyone who has released an album before 2000 or, you're talking about things you simply don't understand because you aren't around enough to pick them up.

Personally, I think it's both.

I was obviously making a generalization of typical behavior here at the Metal forum. I wasn't trying to imply that there weren't people here with decent taste. I was just stating that the consensus seems to favor recycled extreme metal or "innovative" avant-garde.

As for the last statement. Most of the music I listen to nowadays consists of pre-2000 heavy metal. So your statement in that sense is validated. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I listen to the aforementioned music because I am ignorant of new metal or that I am just too "close-minded." If you present me a metal band worth listening to (i.e. has meaning, doesn't rip off other tech death bands, doesn't rely more on technicality than emotion) then I won't at all be reluctant to listen to them.

Sorry for the long post, just thought I would respond accordingly and further elucidate my views.
#40
Yeah, great...

On the band Death...

"Death was a metal band, formed by guitarist Chuck Schuldiner, who began their career in 1983 as Mantas. Due to Schuldiner's desire to make death metal a more melodic and approachable commodity, the band gradually mutated their sound into something that more-closely resembled the music of heavy metal bands like King Diamond and Judas Priest, only with harsh, screamed vocals".

Just...how the fuck does it enter your mind that this is in any way good or accurate? This is all they have on them!
That may be a drastic oversimplification but it's certainly accurate. Death started out as pretty standard death metal and then evolved into melodeath, which is substantially more accessible than death metal itself.

But anyone who would disregard the melodeath albums strictly because some website told them too is a tool in my opinion.
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