#1
A fine day to you, friendly fellow music lovers.
I am new to this forum and not a native english speaker but don't let that stop you
from beeing harsh on my text.. i am seeking to improve, not stall this thing called a learning process ;-)

Crit mine and i'll crit yours
Tanghe
-----------------------------

my foot just fell asleep
and i try to get some rest
to get away from this taste of battlefield
and the smell of the dead

leave me hanging
leave me hanging by a thread
till the spiders with the scissors
tear apart my silver web

and the last shades of dawn
dissapear before the sun
a smiling yellow star
says the battle has been won

|but at what cost, at what cost
|did we see our own inventions
|with impressions to be lost
|future memories to forget

|but at what cost, at what cost
|did we drive our thoughts trough the shredder
|letting the blades do their work
|leave the slivers on a clean slate

my legs just fell asleep
and i try to get some rest
'cause the days are growing longer
but that's only for the best

i guess i failed
guess i failed your little test
kill the rats, the cockroaches
eradicate the pests

and i'm a busy man
always wrongly occupied
Oh, I am fortune's fool
leave it to luck when i decide

|but at what cost, at what cost
|did we see our own inventions
|with impressions to be lost
|future memories to forget

|but at what cost, at what cost
|did we drive our thoughts trough the shredder
|letting the blades do their work
|leave the slivers on a clean slate
#2
Sorry man this is gonna be closed. Please give the rules at the top of the forum a read and then you can repost this.

Thanks
THW
Filth, pure filth... That's what you are.