#1
This song is basically two songs mashed together, one written circa December 2007 (the chorus), and the other written circa two weeks ago (verse, verse rhythm, and chorus rhythm). I intended the latter melody to be for my then-GF, but now I'm thinking about rewriting what would have been a love song into a song about a guy rewriting a love song to a breakup song. Heheheh.

Anyway, I wanted to go for a "wall of guitars" effect. Hope I succeeded. The song is titled "Forty Below" because minus forty degrees is the point at which the Fahrenheit and Celsius scales meet, and I thought it would be a good band name (and therefore, a good song name).

C4C. More will be coming very soon!

P.S. I took out a riff from "Guitar 2" in the Jam section (Guitar 2's only riff), because I got it from experimenting with a McCready riff, and my OCD will kill me if I include something that credit is not given for. I always feel mega-guilty about using C-Am chord progressions because I feel like I'm ripping off Dust in the Wind. This one has a G- D/F#- Em melody. Pearl Jam used a D/F#-Em change in "Immortality". I didn't know that when I wrote the riff, but yeah. All good chord changes are taken. I didn't intentionally rip it off. Agh. MY HEAD. CALM DOWN. Oh man I typed CLAM instead of CALM at first, what a faux pas that would have been, right? Sorry, obsessive-compulsive.
Attachments:
forty.zip
Last edited by Severide at Jun 20, 2008,
#2
I enjoy the intro. Youre right, every good chord progression has been done before, but who cares? If it sounds good, it sounds good. Perhaps extend that 6/4 bar into two bars of 4/4, so the pause is even more dramatic. That way, when everything returns, it gives it a little more umph.

The transition between verse and chorus is nonexistent. Maybe modify the chorus so it sounds like a section all its own, or figure out some other way to contrast these sections. The break is nice, and I enjoy the solo. This would sound really nice with real instruments.

The jam section needs to be filled out more, perhaps with a guitar playing rhythm underneath it, and the song just kind of stops, rather than ending.

Could you crit something of mine? Phantoms is my newest one, but I think Fades Away sounds sort of similar to this piece, so you might like that one. Theyre all in the sig. Thanks man.
#3
That was a pretty cool piece - unfinished, of course, but what you have so far is pretty good. Like mentioned above, there really isn't much of a transition between the verse and chorus. Also, bars 29 and 34 were pretty empty, and some drum rolls would fill that emptiness nicely. The first two bars of the Jam section nearly killed it for me, though. The changing of scales didn't really fit, in my opinion, and it contrasted greatly with the whole melancholic feel of the song.

Other than that I thought it was good, it had a Lynyrd Skynyrd vibe to it (dunno if you were aiming for this or not, but regardless I liked that). I look forward to the finished product.




Crit mine? The last half probably won't suit your tastes much, but you should like the first half (it's all acoustics).

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=835965