#1
im trying to write a song but i cant seem to get anywhere after the first verse...can someone PLEASE help me....


every lie,every tear
saying good bye was my worst fear
i hate to let you go
but baby you need to know
that you werent meant for me
and i need to see that it wasnt meant to be
why does it hurt?
why do i cry?
i know i have to tell this broken love goodbye


PLEASE HELP IF YOU CAN!!!!!!
#3
^ Aye. TS, you're not going to get any comments other than that I don't think. Write about your raw emotion.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#4
Quote by williamdllr
im trying to write a song but i cant seem to get anywhere after the first verse...can someone PLEASE help me....
maybe it's not the first verse.
maybe it's the chorus.

try writing two verses that lead into this idea.



every lie,every tear
saying good bye was my worst fear
syllable count is high compared with the first line.
try dropping was, just let it be implied.
and replace saying goodbye with letting go,

i hate to let you go
if you change to letting go in the previous
you'll want to use say goodbye here.

but baby you need to know
that you werent meant for me
and i need to see that it wasnt meant to be
why does it hurt?
why do i cry?
i know i have to tell this broken love goodbye
get rid of i know
it's just clutter.
Meadows
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#5
It's been said because it's simply not 'occasional' here, and that, to me at least, is this pieces problem.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#7
thx for the ideas...i will take al of this and try again....i have a better look at this now..thx 4 the help