Well, I think it was pretty boring.
You had the same beat all the way. Same with the guitar.
Id say you keep it like that for mabye a minute, and then change it.
Also, use cymbals.
Follow the smoke toward the riff filled land
heres what i think. in a song you have to sometimes think of it as a formula start slow than go fast. this makes the song interesting so you've got the slow but without a faster beat or more intense guitar people aren't going to want to listen to this song.
yeah, thanks for the advice, i am gonna have a bit of a think and see how i can mix it up somewhat, cheers