#1
Post anything you've ever said that was a perfect reply to something someone said to you or around you.
I've got two good ones.

Last school year, there was this chick on my bus who would sing at a very high volume, and she sucked. Horribly. One day she was singing the song Who Let the Dogs Out by the Baja Men, and I (and everyone else) was getting annoyed, so she got to the chorus (Which goes "Who let the dogs out!" several times), so I replied, "Who the Hell let you out of the kitchen?!?" and everyone laughed and I felt good about myself.

Another time, I had just gotten off of the bus to go into the school building, and I overheard one of the people getting off of my bus say, "Two blacks don't make a right." (I have no idea why), and I said, "That's because blacks have no rights."

Share your own stories.
My League of Legends stream
The morning will come
In the press of every kiss
With your head upon my chest

Where I will annoy you
With every waking breath
Until you, decide to wake up
#3
You sound like a jerk
Quote by innertom
So much down syndrome

remember UG Community? thought so.
#5
everything I've ever said in my entire life.


including what I just said.
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...


...You're still disappointing them...
#6
Some stupid asshole said something like 'Shut up, what`s your problem' and I said something like (I`m Dutch so this is probably incorrect) Weel actually,that`s the diversity of our universe wich makes modern black holes have the attention of the US government while they don`t look at pathetic little children like you. I was trying to telly ou but you were only saying: Wanna fight?
#7
Quote by MaXiMuse
Some stupid asshole said something like 'Shut up, what`s your problem' and I said something like (I`m Dutch so this is probably incorrect) Weel actually,that`s the diversity of our universe wich makes modern black holes have the attention of the US government while they don`t look at pathetic little children like you. I was trying to telly ou but you were only saying: Wanna fight?


you win the thread
#10
Quote by coffeeguy9
Did he drop any good loot?

haha

I laughed for 20 minutes the first time I read that.
Quote by Ez0ph
That was a different Feb08er that threatened to suck you off
I remember that


Sadly, I was the threatened.
Quote by Firenze


Let it be known that I concur with everything this gentleman says, ever.



www.myspace.com/tarsusmusic
#11
"What's a good song?"

"I Cum Blood"
Quote by nintendocly
During practice once, my bass player was trying to act cool and headbang and I hit him in the face with sharp head of my washburn (accident maybe). Theres still a tiny bit of blood in my guitar, I think its kinda cool
#12
well i remember someone said look at that pillow its squishy and just lies there and i instinctively said like your mom

and also someone came in limping (i don't know why) and said someone hit my head so i said which one?


(lawls were had)
#14
Ya TS, your riding the failboat right now.
My contribution (wasn't me but a friend): There was an argument between two guys during one of my classes. Between my friend and another guy and the other guy says, "What's the opposite of straight then?" My friend responds (without hesitation with), "you". 'twas cool
#15
Quote by SOADrox429
Post anything you've ever said that was a perfect reply to something someone said to you or around you.
I've got two good ones.

Last school year, there was this chick on my bus who would sing at a very high volume, and she sucked. Horribly. One day she was singing the song Who Let the Dogs Out by the Baja Men, and I (and everyone else) was getting annoyed, so she got to the chorus (Which goes "Who let the dogs out!" several times), so I replied, "Who the Hell let you out of the kitchen?!?" and everyone laughed and I felt good about myself.

Another time, I had just gotten off of the bus to go into the school building, and I overheard one of the people getting off of my bus say, "Two blacks don't make a right." (I have no idea why), and I said, "That's because blacks have no rights."

Share your own stories.



about 60-70 years ago that reply would have been alot better but i guess your point was made, still a wicked thing to say haha.anyway on with my story

when my girlfriend and I had foudn out we were pregnant she asked me (with tears on the way)"you'll still have sex with a fat pregnant lady right?", and i was like "holy **** you'll still have sex!?!?!" we laughed our ass's off. maybe it wasnt the greatest comeback to that question but it really eased the strain of the situation and made her feel better.
#16
Quote by wenwi91
Star Wars FTW

FTW!
actually i dont care for star wars, but i love that scene
he is full of epic win when he says that
Call me Trey.
#17
My English lit teacher was talking about this poem we were reading - I can't remember what it's called, but it basically goes "If you love me, love me for love's sake". And that's the basis of the poem. And the teacher was talking about how the poem was about loving somebody based on true feelings rather than simple attraction. And I had broken up with my gf the day before and I was pissed about love in general, so I freaked and was just like "No it's not. It's some stupid love poem written by some stupid little girl who thinks we should love each other because we have the ability to. Like every other poem we've looked at in this course, we're over-analyzing it, and it's always been a giant stupid waste of time. No poet wants us to read this deep into their work. They would roll in their graves if they heard about this course because they would know, just like I do, that it is stupid."

...I didn't even get in trouble either.
#18
Quote by drag_the_waters
Ya TS, your riding the failboat right now.
My contribution (wasn't me but a friend): There was an argument between two guys during one of my classes. Between my friend and another guy and the other guy says, "What's the opposite of straight then?" My friend responds (without hesitation with), "you". 'twas cool


Major fail.
#19
I'm at a white zombie concert and I have this shirt on that says 'for every animal you don't eat, i eat three' (maddox shirt dogging vegetarians) and this busty bitch comes up and says 'i'm a vegetarian.'

i said 'sorry, it's a horrible disease'

and another time, right after a killswitch concert in dallas, this hobo is asking me for money and i asked if he took credit.
The best thing about life is knowing you put it together
#20
This one relates a little more to guitars.
A friend of mine and I were doing some guitar shopping and the salesman asked if sustain was important to my friend. He was like "The longer the scream the better" and without thinking I went "That's what she said."
#21
Quote by SOADrox429
Post anything you've ever said that was a perfect reply to something someone said to you or around you.
I've got two good ones.

Last school year, there was this chick on my bus who would sing at a very high volume, and she sucked. Horribly. One day she was singing the song Who Let the Dogs Out by the Baja Men, and I (and everyone else) was getting annoyed, so she got to the chorus (Which goes "Who let the dogs out!" several times), so I replied, "Who the Hell let you out of the kitchen?!?" and everyone laughed and I felt good about myself.

Another time, I had just gotten off of the bus to go into the school building, and I overheard one of the people getting off of my bus say, "Two blacks don't make a right." (I have no idea why), and I said, "That's because blacks have no rights."

Share your own stories.


Dude you sound kind of like an a-hole. Sexism and racism have their place in fights, but not as you've described. Use sexist, racist, homophobic, generally insensitive remarks as a parallel to throwing sand in your opponent's face. It's a fight, and you use whatever is available at the time, you don't actually mean it.

Telling a girl to get back in the kitchen is only appropriate when she's being uppity and arrogant, as a means to show that you don't take her seriously at all. For just an annoying girl singing, you being sexist makes you look like a moron and her look like a victim. A resounding "Will you please just shut the f*ck up?" would have been much more suited to that situation. It may have started an altercation between you, and at a later point, you could bring up the "get back in the kitchen" angle.

Same thing with the black comment. If you're arguing with a black person, feel free to use their race as a weapon, to varying degrees, depending on how angry you want to make them. Just randomly spouting racism just makes you out to be an idiot.
When crying don't help
You can't compose yourself
It's best to compose a poem
An honest verse of longing
Or a simple song of hope...
#22
Quote by bush_slayer_07
when my girlfriend and I had foudn out we were pregnant she asked me


Hum.... we?

On-topic, I usually end up with the lines too late.
Quote by MH400
a girl on the interwebz?

You have 2 options.

1. Tits.
2. GTFO.

#24
Quote by Allnightmask22
Dude you sound kind of like an a-hole. Sexism and racism have their place in fights, but not as you've described. Use sexist, racist, homophobic, generally insensitive remarks as a parallel to throwing sand in your opponent's face. It's a fight, and you use whatever is available at the time, you don't actually mean it.

Telling a girl to get back in the kitchen is only appropriate when she's being uppity and arrogant, as a means to show that you don't take her seriously at all. For just an annoying girl singing, you being sexist makes you look like a moron and her look like a victim. A resounding "Will you please just shut the f*ck up?" would have been much more suited to that situation. It may have started an altercation between you, and at a later point, you could bring up the "get back in the kitchen" angle.

Same thing with the black comment. If you're arguing with a black person, feel free to use their race as a weapon, to varying degrees, depending on how angry you want to make them. Just randomly spouting racism just makes you out to be an idiot.


It was a joke, I wasn't being serious. If you knew that chick, you would know that what I said was justified because she always acts uppity and arrogant. You have never met her, and if you did, I'm sure you would dislike her just as much or more than me.
That was a joke as well. The person who I was replying to was mixed and the person he was talking to was black. They both found it quite funny.
My League of Legends stream
The morning will come
In the press of every kiss
With your head upon my chest

Where I will annoy you
With every waking breath
Until you, decide to wake up
#25
My GF: "I love you"

Me: "I love me too" (another time it was "You and everyone else")

Must Not Sleep.


Must Warn Others.

Gear:
Gibson Special Faded SG
Orange Tiny Terror (Combo)
MXR Carbon Copy Delay
Dunlop Crybaby Wah

3DS friend code: 3995-7035-3562
#27
well i was in a tech class in HS and this kid was being pretty dumb and the teacher was like shut up tyler your being a pain in my ass. and this kid jack was like no butt sex is a pain in your ass. it made me giggle.
#28
Girl: "I want you in my bed"
Me:"And I want to be in your bed, with you on the floor and me asleep."

She walked off.
xXx
#29
Quote by drag_the_waters
I know, it was intended that way.

Bullsh*t
Extispicy: Predicting The Future Though The Study Of Animal Entrails...
#31
I used to work as a traffic controller at the local casino. To leave my post to take a bathroom break I had to radio in a "10-100" so someone could relieve me until I was done. One day I was on lunch break with my fellow TCs and our department assistant manager. I get up to go to the bathroom and the assistant manager asks, "Where are you going?" "To the bathroom. What, do I need to call in a 10-100?" There was much laughter and ooooooing around the table and I briefly thought the AM was going to report my ass, but he laughed it off. Only two weeks into the job and I already had a smart mouth.
"To be matter-of-fact about the world is to blunder into fantasy - and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful." - Robert A. Heinlein
#32
Quote by *rockstarjono*
Girl: "I want you in my bed"
Me:"And I want to be in your bed, with you on the floor and me asleep."

She walked off.
xXx


now that one is truly a Perfect Reply. *thumbs up*
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...


...You're still disappointing them...