#1
OK,
I got into a bike wrck this week,and my hands are in pretty bad condition. I couldn't play guitar, or fap for like 2 days. Since I couldn't fap, I had to be creative. I took a stuffed football (like a teddy bear, except a football) cut a hole in it, and humped it. Now, I have something like a rugburn on my penis. Any ideas on how to heal it?
Thanks!!!
#5
YELLOWFRIZBEE s FreezerBurn


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#6
Quote by Nakon14
*facepalm*


Lol'd.

Massage salt into the shaft, that'll definately help.
Last edited by CrazyDavey at Jul 6, 2008,
#7
You are just one horny mother****er.............
I will make you change your mind.

Quote by wizards?
*e-hugs mindchanger*
"you're still awesome"
#9
Quote by griffRG7321
become a circumsizer, you get like £60,000 a year + tips.

Quote by Flying Couch
Because I'm not aerodynamic. All the other airborne furniture laugh at me.

LIKE PORTISHEAD?
#11
wow. i wouldnt even wish rugburn onto my worst enemy's penis...


or would i?
Quote by cakeandpiemofo
Quote by tuwyci
why are metal musicians prone to fatness?
Cause there music is heavy.


Writing music is hard D:
#14
ROFL

I actually laughed at that, my family must think I'm crazy.

The only that can heal that is time. You won't be fapping for a while.
#15
Quote by {DSA_Soldier}
You can't play guitar or fap but you can type this?


I can play guitar now, and it's the palms that hurt, but I still have scrapes that I couldn't fap with
#16
dont be a pussy i broke my index and middle finger i could still fap fine
take it like a man
Quote by Green_Jelly

Quote by gnomieowns
damn. can't you get your girlfrie...
nevermind.
Right now you're offending at least 75% of the Pit.


jackson warrior on the way in $400
#17
You couldn't keep from touching yourself for two days? THAT, my friend, is pathetic.


And on another note, try some Icyhot?
Jesus for president. PM me to join the campaign. or just sig it.

Of course God has a sense of humor. Look at the Platypus...

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#19
Did it not burn during?

I assume you "finished"
i'd tap that .........speaking to a bass, its a music joke!

Harley Benton-hbb200bk
Epiphone Thunderbird
Electro Harmonix Double muff
Harley Benton 80-b amp
Ernie Ball Strings are my preferance!
#23
Schecter C-1 Hellraiser
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Morley Bad Horsie II


#24
If you used a teddy bear, where did you make the hole? If you made it between the legs I don't even want to imagine what it looked like when you humped it.

(poor teddy)
#27
Quote by Samurai Chicken
If you used a teddy bear, where did you make the hole? If you made it between the legs I don't even want to imagine what it looked like when you humped it.

(poor teddy)


it was a stuffed football(american) but it was the same material as a teddy bear
#28
Vicks Vapor Rub helps with that type of thing.
-limefan913

Quote by Chad48309
Quote by The_lizard_king
Originally Posted by The_lizard_king
It really does relieve stress. I was pissed off for a week because I didn't jerk off, so if you quit it you will go mad.
I don't think that's the correct use of the phrase "going mad."
#29
I recommend rubbing deep heat all over your **** and balls liberally
Quote by griffRG7321
become a circumsizer, you get like £60,000 a year + tips.

Quote by Flying Couch
Because I'm not aerodynamic. All the other airborne furniture laugh at me.

LIKE PORTISHEAD?
#31
Quote by guitardude34875
it was a stuffed football(american) but it was the same material as a teddy bear


Good, that saved me from a lot of therapy
#32
Quote by gnomieowns
damn. can't you get your girlfrie...

nevermind.

Right now you're offending at least 75% of the Pit.
Quote by lizarday
oh yeah? well larry king the slayer guitarist owns bc rich guitars. (i think)
#36
hahahaha, that wasnt very clever, least u'll know better next time
Quote by FrenchyFungus


Awww, thanks Frenchy

Quote by Cobain_Is_King
I got a packet of Love Hearts when I was six and every one said 'You Have a Tiny Penis'




Hate humans? Click here
#37
You do realize you've probably created a new std.
▼▲
Quote by shdowfox17
awesome avatar,denn0069!
Quote by Valo
The most truth I've heard in the pit.
ever.
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#38
This will help. apply liberally to the affexted area, twice a day, until there's nothing left.