#1
Politics is all bull****
The business man controls it
Corruption runs rampant
they start wars for their profit

Money is the cause
Weapons are the excuse
We go to war to stop him!
Put his head in the noose

Tanks and planes are the answer
bombs and missles will solve it
but don't worry it's all justified by the men who sold it!

Soldiers dying
Though the war is won
The politicians don’t care
That young boy’s blood is flowing

They say they will stop it
Put an end to it all
But once they get in office
Where the money flows
They’ll change their minds
So they can line their pockets

Money is the cause
Weapons are the excuse
We go to war to stop him!
Put his head in the noose
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Last edited by hansarvin at Jul 9, 2008,
#3
no **** theres a megadeth song called holy wars.
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#4
The lyrics are good however, i would just suggest a less ripoffy title.
Staff Sergeant of The Megadeth Military
PM BlackicN to join

Archbishop of Zeppelinism
PM heartbreaker

Gear
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ESP LTD MH1000
Fender 50th Anniversary Strat
81 Gibson SG
Parker PM20
Amps
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Roland Cube 60x
#5
Quote by guitargod21136
The lyrics are good however, i would just suggest a less ripoffy title.


I know this , I just threw on a title quick.
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#6
while i was reading it, i thought to myself, "this has a very megadeth feel to it." its pretty good.
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#7
I agree with Lynch above. It does have a megadeth feel to it. I could definately imagine mustaine rasping this. But yeah, good job. Very current eventsy. For only ten mins it flows pretty well. Would like to see some additional stanzas.
#8
^thank you very much I appreciate it, and yea I'm working on more stanzas right now, I'll edit it and post them when they're done.
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#9
Quote by hansarvin
I wrote this in like 10 minutes, just wondering what other people thought of it

Politics it's all bull****
The business man corrupts it,
They treat every god damned war like it a holy one

The first line screams the same line that a million other lines I've read scream. If the first line is still going to be there in an edit, having the 'it's all' there in the middle makes it not really flow in to the next line.
If you believe that it is the buisness man corrupting politics, you explain why you think so.
The introduction in to talking about war has the same problem. You really need to explain out the links.


Tanks and planes are the answer,
bombs and missles will solve it, *missiles
but don't worry it's all justified by the men who sell it!

The syllable count seems off, but if it's a song then well, it may work if you've already got a vocal line. Still needs more explanation, or just a more metered way of saying it.

The Man in the white house says no go to peace and liberty,
after all who needs peace when war will solve it!

This would be more effective if it rhymed.
Explaining it more would be better. Just plain better. At the moment all you're doing is saying something about hating war and the President that everyone knows everyone thinks anyway. I wouldn't compare this to Megadeth lyrics. Megadeth lyrics use metaphors, imagery and quick one liners throwing your opinion or what they expect you to think back at you. Holy Wars also has the character writing talking about their own fears and what's happening to them. This is more powerful because it personalises the message so it's easier to relate to than someone just saying '**** the govt.!' Writing about how this affects you on a personal level would make this more effective. If you can't, you shouldn't write it.


Edit: this song is meant to have a Megadethy heavy metal feel too it if that helps


Could do with more of this, but start working on what's already here and get on to that in the same tone. Hope you don't mind the honest crit, or what I thought was an honest crit.
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#10
icf it was a little longer i could definitatly imagine that with a metal song.
im not the biggest metal fan so im not the best person to crit it but i liked it.
but yes new name, and possibly another stanza would help...
either way it was still very good
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#11
Pretty sick man. I don't know what kind of music these lyrics are going to pair up with, but it seems like it'll be what most people have said " Megadeth". METAL!
#12
I added some stanzas and changed some stuff around, I'd like to know what you guys think! Also if someone wants to do a c4c I would happily do that
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#13
That was cool. You made smart lyrics right there dude. The title is really bad though, think of something better. It'll be really cool to hear a song that sounds like RATM with these lyrics, fits their genre very well.

C4C pls.
#14
Sorry mate, think this has exactly the same problem as the last version.
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