#1
this is a song Im writing for a girl that I love. It might be an "asking out song". I know theres already enough of these out there, but hey, isnt it romantic to write a song for a girl? yeah it is!

I cant decide on which variation of verse one to use. heres both

V1:
I see your face
as clear as day
your smiles the sun
a summers day

other V1:
I see your face
as clear as day
that twinkle in your eye
when you smile that way

two choruses too. which one is better?

chorus one:
your all I can think about
your whats on my mind
your all I can think about
so slowly moves the time
how slowly moves the time

chorus 2:
your all I can think about
your whats on my mind
when your not around
so slowly moves the time
how slowly moves the time

v2:
were so far apart
but your so close to me
just a few words away
could our hearts meet?

chorus

V3:
I stare into those deep blue eyes
as beautiful as can be
and I hope that youll be mine
I hope that we can be

I dont know if I should change the bridge or not. does it go with the song? or not.

bridge:
Ill take the leap of faith
and hope I do not fall
Ill take the passing chance
to ask a question from my heart
a question straight from my heart.
#3
the second verse 1, second chorus and keep the bridge. Good luck!
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#4
Quote by taz354
this is a song Im writing for a girl that I love. It might be an "asking out song". I know theres already enough of these out there, but hey, isnt it romantic to write a song for a girl? yeah it is!

I cant decide on which variation of verse one to use. heres both

V1:
I see your face
as clear as day
your smiles the sun
a summers day
I liked this one better than the second version of it

other V1:
I see your face
as clear as day
that twinkle in your eye
when you smile that way

two choruses too. which one is better?

chorus one:
your all I can think about
your whats on my mind
your all I can think about
so slowly moves the time
how slowly moves the time

chorus 2:
your all I can think about
your whats on my mind
when your not around
so slowly moves the time
how slowly moves the time
ok this is better than one but the last line i think shold be changed
v2:
were so far apart
but your so close to me
just a few words away
could our hearts meet?

chorus

V3:
I stare into those deep blue eyes
as beautiful as can be
and I hope that youll be mine
I hope that we can be

I dont know if I should change the bridge or not. does it go with the song? or not.

bridge:
Ill take the leap of faith
and hope I do not fall
Ill take the passing chance
to ask a question from my heart
a question straight from my heart.
i think this is good as is

thats my input but their are pros on here that can help more than me on this
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