#1
My first attempt at songwriting
http://profile.ultimate-guitar.com/iceman_8319/music/

It has a meloncholy feel to it in the beginning and then gets a bit cheerier at the end.

If it's good enough I'll record it again (and smooth out some of the rough parts) and try to submit it for the UG acoustic album.

Thanks!
time machine. Inadvertently, I had created a
#2
The ideas are really nice. Even though, after time it's getting repetitive, especially the part with the 2 lead guitars in harmony after something like a minute.
The "heavy" part sounds a bit like a song written for an emo-band... i'd cut that part out. Perhaps some picking there would be nice, but pretty fast and with heavy strokes. The rest is great, but still a bit repetitive, so perhaps you should shorten some parts, but not too much.
And imho, it sounds way too piezo-sounding. Takes the balls off an acoustic :/ But this could also be because i'm listening just with my laptopspeakers.

cheers!
#3
Writing while I'm listening....I like the song alot. The accoustic guitar is one of my favorite instruments, and I think you play pretty well. Yeah it does need to be polished a little, but for your 1st recording, ever, I think you did a very good job.
I really liked the break at about 3:10. It was a very nice touch. I think some cool subtle keyboards or even maybe some lyrics might make the song more complete.

Very good over all. Keep it up!


Wadester

Crit one of these:

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=905082
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=899153
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=898572
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=899869
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=905683
#4
Going as I listen...
This is really good for a first try at songwriting man. The lead that comes in is pretty neat sounding. It could use a little polish, but it sounds good. I agree with dude up there, though, I don't know about the heavy part. I think it's a little too much of a dynamic change. Maybe don't go so hard at it, and I think that would make it sound better. The transition out of it could use some work too.
The part after, near the end, is pretty sweet. Are you doing two-handed tapping there?

Overall, very awesome first go. Just polish it up a little, maybe shorten some parts (it was interesting enough to not get all that repetitive though) and it'll be really solid. Keep it up man.

Check out one of mine?
"Meadows" is the instrumental. The others have vocals.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=15093164#post15093164
#5
Quote by Reeen
The ideas are really nice. Even though, after time it's getting repetitive, especially the part with the 2 lead guitars in harmony after something like a minute.
The "heavy" part sounds a bit like a song written for an emo-band... i'd cut that part out. Perhaps some picking there would be nice, but pretty fast and with heavy strokes. The rest is great, but still a bit repetitive, so perhaps you should shorten some parts, but not too much.
And imho, it sounds way too piezo-sounding. Takes the balls off an acoustic :/ But this could also be because i'm listening just with my laptopspeakers.

cheers!



Thanks!

I need to find a better way to get that heavy feel in that middle part without making it sound too "Emo", I'll be trying some other riffs i've been writing.

You're right about the peizo-y sound, though. Since I use a Boss RC-2 Loopstation, I also use an acoustic amp and just mic the amp, and I was getting some horrible feedback when trying to use the built-in mic in my guitar. However i finally fixed that by moving my whole set up from my bed room to living room. (sounds a hell of a lot better, and there isn't any feedback)


Quote by wadester
Writing while I'm listening....I like the song alot. The accoustic guitar is one of my favorite instruments, and I think you play pretty well. Yeah it does need to be polished a little, but for your 1st recording, ever, I think you did a very good job.
I really liked the break at about 3:10. It was a very nice touch. I think some cool subtle keyboards or even maybe some lyrics might make the song more complete.

Very good over all. Keep it up!


Wadester



Thanks!
That little part just kind of came naturaly, I just tapped the whole thing out once and it stuck.
I'll definately consider the keyboards, but I'm not very good at vox =/


Quote by bradman2k6
Going as I listen...
This is really good for a first try at songwriting man. The lead that comes in is pretty neat sounding. It could use a little polish, but it sounds good. I agree with dude up there, though, I don't know about the heavy part. I think it's a little too much of a dynamic change. Maybe don't go so hard at it, and I think that would make it sound better. The transition out of it could use some work too.
The part after, near the end, is pretty sweet. Are you doing two-handed tapping there?

Overall, very awesome first go. Just polish it up a little, maybe shorten some parts (it was interesting enough to not get all that repetitive though) and it'll be really solid. Keep it up man.

Check out one of mine?
"Meadows" is the instrumental. The others have vocals.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=15093164#post15093164


I'll work on that middle part, I've got a few ideas now.

That second part is tapping, although I kind of cheat and use a Loopstation (That thing is great, I can record the entire song in one take)
I glad you liked that, it's my favorite part to perform, though it's the hardest.
time machine. Inadvertently, I had created a
#6
This is a really great effort for your first recording. I dig it a lot. I'd love to hear some lyrics or something set to this. It starts off a little slow, but picks up well. Nice job on this. I can't wait to hear more from you.

~Anthony