#1
Ok thankyou greyfedora for helping me out earlier, this is what i have so far for the song i wrote, gonna be sang mostly with metal/hardcore vocals....

LOOK!

Look at how much you've taken for granted
Throwing your precious life away,
What is it that your waiting for
Closing inviting doors holding opportunity
Isolated from your peers
Afraid of change, for the future may hold defeat, living your effortless life

[chorus]

Day by day we complain,
yet we dont seek change
Why should we complain


[breakdown]
We've fallen so many times
Yet life goes on
We've fallen so many times
Yet life goes on
We've succeed so few times
And life seems so much better


You wrinkle with abandoned opportunity
How many more doors must you shut
How many more windows must i open
Changing is part of life, we must accept this,
hope for the best,
hope for better days


[chorus]

Day by day we complain,
yet we dont seek change
why should we complain


[ending]

Your in above your head, how many times must i fish you out
Your either gonna hit or miss, are you going to shoot?
Or are your flaws going to restrain your dreams
#2
Haha, I enjoyed the title. It's motivational.

The flow was generally good. I didn't understand the 'must i fish you out.' Then again, it's a song. 'Day by day we complain' was my favorite line so I'm glad it was in th chorus. Overall, this was pretty good. I don't know how this would fit with a melody but you wrote it so you probably have something in mind! Keep up the good work!

If you want to, you could review mine and I would totally appreciate the feedback.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=911488