#1
Really ****ing long for whole story; read it all. For shortened part read second paragraph, and other wise read sentence long summary on bottom.

Alright, so me and my two cousins, my sister, and my friend (valennic) went out to Silverwood lake (local lake around Hesperia, CA) to some night fishing. We ran down to the spot we usually fish at to see if it was flooded or not, it was, so we walked back, grabbed our stuff, and looked for a new spot. We ended up going around this big perimeter fence to this small cove on the side of the lake. We set up, and got ready to fish. A few set up fishing polls later, we were fishing. Well...my cousin is a ****ing moron, and cant fish worth a ****. He ended up breaking two of the polls without even getting a bite. -_-. One of my cousins, me, and valennic ended up going for a walk because we got bored. We thought about going to check out the aquaduct that wasnt very far away, we got there, and we thought we were going to jump in because it looked like a big curved bowl from a distance. It was a flat out 21 foot drop to the bottom. We said "**** THAT!" and started heading back. Being the kinds of people we are, we decided to try and roll one of the massive boulders surrounding the lake INTO the lake.

So as we get closer to the boulder, we check out EVERY angle to make sure it will roll smoothly down the shore into the water. It took us about four or five rocks to find the PERFECT rock, we looked as closely as we could to make sure it was absolutely perfect to roll. So as we gathered around it, we got ready to roll it, stretched out our muscles, stared the rock down. We proceeded to breathe deep, grasp the edges tightly, and pull as hard as we can. We failed...... After this fail, we inspected the rock closer to look for a better handhold, just as valennic was about to put his hand in one of the crevices, a snake popped out of it. We jumped back like frightened little children and yelled "OH ****!" We grabbed the nearest stick to us, and attempted to stop the little bugger. He evaded the first few attempts, and managed to slip under another rock. We all got on our stomaches and attempted to snag him with the stick. He proceeded to hide in a small corner in said rock, so we backed up and thought; "This isnt working...we need a longer stick." So we ran to the nearest tree, broke off two branches and poked around the hole, attempting to get at him. He popped out his head and stared at me...those dark, cold eyes....I wont ever forget them...*shudders*. We ran back to the fishing spot, and spotted a long piece of metal hanging from a fence. We broke the steel from the fence and broke it in half (yes, we are that manly) and ran back to the rock. I tried stabbing around the inside of the rock, looking for him....I never found him again.... I wanted a snake...

tl;dr We got ****ing owned by a little snake, about as long as my forearm.

****ing snakes......
Quote by RawrDemon
"Side effects may include... INVOLUNTARY ANAL DISCHARGE."





Scitzo of the bass militia, PM Nutter_101 to join.
#3
^Exactly what I thought.
Quote by Teh Forest King
A kid took a fetal pig during pig dissection, put a napkin on it as a cape, wrote "super pig" on it, then threw it out the window onto the greenhouse below, yelling "super pig, blast off!". He failed the pig lab
#4



EDIT: DAMNIT! Beaten by like 30 seconds rahfulmao!
"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
#6
Wtf did the snake do to you? How would you like it if people started rocking your house around, and you popped out to see what was going on, and they started trying to attack you with a stick. You should have just left it alone.
Jackson KVX10
Epiphone EB-3

Bugera 6260
Laney Supergroup Mk 1
Marshall VS100RH
Laney LX412A

Bad Monkey
Crybaby
Metal Muff
Fish N Chips
#7
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Did you know the odds of a Vault-Tec shelter failing are 1,763,497 to 1?

So imagine life in a Vault-Tec Vault. Not just a future.
A brighter future... underground.

Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.
#8
Everyone who's posted this far has had the same thought, including me.

Edit: Dammit, you three ^
Quote by Tire Me.
Raping her in front of other people would be morally wrong.

Quote by Bubbles516
wtf290 uses make bubbles feel like crap
Its super effective!
#9
Quote by SlinkyBlue



EDIT: DAMNIT! Beaten by like 30 seconds rahfulmao!

^Don't sweat it, lulz ensued so you should get some of the credit too.


*hands slinkyblue one homemade e-cookie*
#11
*insert pear here*
Twitter: ScottWotton
Tumblr: ScottWotton
YouTube: ScottWotton

3DS FC: 5043-1553-4655
Friend Safari: Rock type with Boldore, Pupitar and Barbaracle.

Wants his username as ScottWotton. >.>
#13
i've had enough of these mother****ing snakes in this mother****ing rock!!!
I love my keyboardist, he's hot.

Quote by phlip999
The Pit is the epitome of higher learning and full of intillectual people who help the masses solve their problems.



The Llama Forum Bagel Group
#14
Quote by Glimsom
Wtf did the snake do to you? How would you like it if people started rocking your house around, and you popped out to see what was going on, and they started trying to attack you with a stick. You should have just left it alone.



What the hell were you thinking?


i duno lol. tihs r liek wen i traid drawn maiself n teh t0ilit.

ROFL.

EPICPHAIL.

gess i cant dai.
#15
Yeah, the bugger should have bit you for what you were doing to him. Instead, you just scared eachother ****less!
I love Cheezy Poofs, you love Cheezy Poofs,
If we didn't eat Cheezy Poofs, We'd be lame!

WHY SO SERIOUS SON!?
#16
Quote by wizards?
^Don't sweat it, lulz ensued so you should get some of the credit too.


*hands slinkyblue one homemade e-cookie*


Oh lawd is dats a cookie??!

"The future's uncertain, and The End is always near."
-Jim Morrison
#17
ur an asshole, the snake didnt do anything but defend its territory, snakes are the kinda animal that leave u alone if u leave them alone.
#18
To clarify....we didnt REALLY try to poke the **** out of it, we just tried to pick it up, it was just a California King snake, it was pretty small, and I wanted it
Quote by RawrDemon
"Side effects may include... INVOLUNTARY ANAL DISCHARGE."





Scitzo of the bass militia, PM Nutter_101 to join.
#19
Woot i have five pet snakes.
Gearz:
Squier classic vibe 50's strat, modded.
Dunlop 535q
Korg Pitchblack
Carvin X100B

Coming soon to a pedal board near you:
Analogman Sunface
Lovepedal E6
Area 51 wah
Skreddy Lunar Module
Malekko 616 Ekko
#20
Honestly, I thought there would be a lot more Samuel L. in here . . .
#22
Quote by metallight16
"This isnt working...we need a longer stick."



you would be surprised at the amount of times ive heard that before