#1
I posted this in a thread yestarday but it got locked because it was my second in one day. That'll teach me to read the rules. :S Well here it is again on a different day and my last thread for this week. Tell me what you think...

Maintain

Maintain the right to keep the people from the truth
Keep it locked away and make your citizens afraid of you
Rumours start conspiracies and the truth is bleeding out
Can you even remember what this war is all about
Bring the troops home, that's what your people said
But you do it your own way, their requests aren't met.
one day you'll realise that order must be done.
And when the people come to power you will lose your throne.

Maintain,
Constant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

Evidently you must know that soon you will be gone
The people vote against you, majoraties can't be wrong
Your time is running short, only one thing left to do
take the men from their families, to the battlefield, their tomb
The widowed lovers crying and the chilrden filled with hate.
They grow up full of anger, what did you create?
They track you down to kill you, you take your final breath.
You chose your own path and this one led to death

Maintain,
Constant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

-Break-

Maintain,
Constant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

Maintain,
Constant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.
Last edited by Dred606 at Jul 22, 2008,
#2
this is cool
1 of my favorite lyrical themes ... u knw what i like abt this piece ?! u haven tried to u knw make the words rhyme which is seen everywhere even in my own piece ... that is cool and it makes alot of sense ... for some reason i sense ur a democrat lol ... it kind of relates to the war in iraq ... my thought though ...
in my view i see it a thrash meal song ...
great stuff man ... hope to see more from u ...

PS. u cant post more than once in a day ?! weird
#3
done throne
they don't rhyme.
constant.. not canstant.
because I cant stand canstant...
#4
Quote by Dred606
I posted this in a thread yestarday but it got locked because it was my second in one day. That'll teach me to read the rules. :S Well here it is again on a different day and my last thread for this week. Tell me what you think...

Maintain

Maintain the right to keep the people from the truth
Keep it locked away and make your citizens afraid of you
Rumours start conspiracies and the truth is bleeding out
Can you even remember what this war is all about
Bring the troops home, that's what your people said
But you do it your own way, their requests aren't met.
one day you'll realise that order must be done.
And when the people come to power you will lose your throne.

Maintain,
Canstant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

Evidently you must know that soon you will be gone
The people vote against you, majoraties can't be wrong(the spelling of majorities can be. lol)
Your time is running short, only one thing left to do
take the men from their families, to the battlefield, their tomb
The widowed lovers crying and the chilrden filled with hate.
They grow up full of anger, what did you create?
They track you down to kill you, you take your final breath.
You chose your own path and this one led to death

Maintain,
Canstant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

-Break-

Maintain,
Canstant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.

Maintain,
Canstant reign,
Take lives...
And destroy them.



This is very skindred to me. I'd prefer you rhyme or not rhyme for structure's sake. I give it a 6/10. If you spell check I'd say 7/10.
#5
Quote by candysars
done throne
they don't rhyme.
constant.. not canstant.
because I cant stand canstant...


thats what i said dummy ... its not always about rhyming lol ... u seem like a beginner i swear ... its not always abt startin with fly and ending with die ...
#6
Quote by candysars
done throne
they don't rhyme.
constant.. not canstant.
because I cant stand canstant...


Cheers for pointing that out. I'll correct it. The spelling bit that is.
Last edited by Dred606 at Jul 22, 2008,