#1
Hey guys. I actually wrote this song last year, but never got around to recording it. Today I was bored, and finally did. The solo is totally improvised. Hope you enjoy Remember to make your crit helpful, and mine will be too.

http://artists.ultimate-guitar.com/ashenspire/
Alta Vera - My real life alternative rock band.
Ashen Spire - My personal metal band.

Super Mario, F-Zero & Dragonball Z covers!

PSN: whatev27

Let me ask you, does a machine like yourself ever experience fear?

#2
Nice one.

It seems that there's like a bad note or something right when the piano starts playing... is that supposed to be there?

The distortion sounds heavy as balls. Good tone.

I love the riff at 0:24. That's cool stuff, good harmonies.

NICE. The lead at 1:05 is my favorite part of the song so far. Sounds great.

At 1:19 you should turn up the guitar during the break so it's just a little more audible. Another cool riff right after this. And I love the little break with the harmonized guitars.

Yeah the solo started off a little bland, but it got better towards the end. I still think you should just write a solo though. I used to improvise all my solos but now I'm starting to write them and they sound so much better. There was also a mistake at 2:18 that was very noticable.

So yeah that was a pretty good song. There was nothing in it that was like"WOW THAT WAS COOL", but it was still really good. My only suggestions would be to redo the guitar solo, and maybe vary the drums a little, cause they got really boring after a while.

8.5/10. Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=912121
I'm a person.
#4
Thanks for the crits Umm yea the very first note with the piano got cut off unfortunately I'll get back to your crit asap PinkisCool, but unfortunately time constraints and a weak connection have left little opportunity to do it. Don't worry, I won't forget about you
Alta Vera - My real life alternative rock band.
Ashen Spire - My personal metal band.

Super Mario, F-Zero & Dragonball Z covers!

PSN: whatev27

Let me ask you, does a machine like yourself ever experience fear?

#5
at 30sec it gets reeealy good, and then theres a nice change to an equally as good bit after that. pretty inflames-ish (dont worry, im talking about early in flames :P)

the only thing i can really say is that theres a bum note or something at the end of the solo.
#6
Thanks for the crit
Alta Vera - My real life alternative rock band.
Ashen Spire - My personal metal band.

Super Mario, F-Zero & Dragonball Z covers!

PSN: whatev27

Let me ask you, does a machine like yourself ever experience fear?

#7
I got a Symphony-x vibe from your intro (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeO67D99rVc ). I reckon a good palm muted syncopated single note riff (that has the bass drum sync with it) would be cool before your harmony guitars come in - sorry I just love those. Sort of like this 3:08 in this song. Sorry it's not the best example.

The drums are obviously programmed, I think it would sound better if you used some different fills. I liked your solo (soo much better than I can do), but the ending sounded like it was cut or you scraped your strings.

Not sure about the fade out at the end, the piano fading out feels okay, but the fade out of the distorted guitar felt too quick. It felt like you lost the gain as it was fading out but you could still the guitar afterwards. Sorry I can't really describe what I mean clearly.

According to your profile you like opeth, how about sneaking a little acoustic section in there?

C4C? my song is very opeth-esque, so hopefully you'll like it.
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=919948
#9
**** this is ****in great!

The piano gives a good vibe, the guitar has awesome harmonys, it's like slightly more inspired metalcore/ In Flames style. Sounds heavy but not too predictable
Great recording quality!
The solo is awesome! The first one, once again the harmonys are awesome, and the "lighter" bit adds a nice melodic touch. The guitar tone is tight and clear!
Kk, solo. Nice use of pinch harmonics and legato. Bit of a bum note before the awesome legato. Fit in a harmonic divebomb at the end at that would be sick!!

I'mnot kidding when I ay that I would listen to this if it had a singer! It kinda reminds me of Maiden/Nightwish

10/10.
Mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=922431