#1
Haven't written anything overly amazing in a while, but I'm proud of this. Crit 4 crit, comment 4 comment any feedback appreciated.


Here in your arms is where I feel safe
Just like I did for so many yesterdays
But come tommorrow things might not be the same
For we're all just players in this dangerous game we call life

And I don't believe in violence, but I believe in peace
And war's the only way to save the middle east
Sorry baby, but I just gotta leave
Please don't forget me, please do this for me

Treat every kiss as if it were our last kiss
Treasure my touch and my taste
Take all the pictures and put them in a scrapbook
To look at while I am away

It's miserable here, I just wanna leave
This broken guitar represents your melody
Maybe I'll burn it, and breathe you into me
Cause I don't need it to remind me how much I need you

So I'll treat every kiss as if it were our last kiss
Treasure your touch and your taste
Looking at all the picutures, there in the scrapbook
To remind me to live for today

Now I'm looking down at your face
Why did it have to end this way?
I can see you but you'll never see me again
All you can do until then

Is treat every kiss as if it were our last kiss
Treasure my touch and my taste
Take all the pictures and put them in a scrapbook
To look at now that I'm away

So treat every kiss as if it were our last kiss
Treasure my touch and my taste
Take all the pictures and put them in a scrapbook
Leave them sitting by my grave
#4
There are a million songs with the same title, for a ton of different titles, I don't know why people even point that out. I liked it. Some of the topics were all over the place (the middle east thing), but it was well written, and seems like it could be quite catchy.
#5
Sorry man, but I just feel like I've heard this song a ton of times. It seems like a formula similar to "Something about a girl, oh and gotcha he's actually dead." but it does seem pretty catchy.
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#7
Quote by nogalespimp
you suck


this really helped me

THANKS A LOT!
#8
Not sure whether or not I have enough Forum respect for my critiques to be taken seriously, but.....

Lyrics were Mediocre.
It does indeed sound like it could be pretty catchy,