I am so frustrated every time I try to match the sound of my bass to the recorded song. With my guitar(not bass) all I do i.e.... is find the right distortion, maybe add some effect, set the patch and, vizwaa!! I am ready to play the song on stage.

Not so with Bass, I've bought many amps(tube and ss), different basses and so many different effect pedals trying to match sounds that I am never happy about the way they sound. For instance our band wants to play the song ruby soho by rancid now and I cant get that upper frequency ringing on my bass to match the recording. I can use eq to match most of the sound and then split the upper and lower frequencies into compressed lows and expanded highs, but then there is still some kind of swish-ping sound I cant seem to find an effect to match?

any help apprieciated!
I can almost guarantee that even the original artist doesn't have the same tone live as in the studio. Just find a tone that sounds good to you and work more on making the song your own. Covers are always better when the band isn't trying to mimic the original. You're still playing the same notes and singing the same words, so try something new and interesting.