#1
every night
the neighbours would gather
around the wall of my garden
to sing their sweet songs.
houses now holding two
were filled up with thirty
and every family
came and they sung;
drawing accordions
in to minor temptations,
fingering beauty
in a Christian praise,
the hamlet, together,
as a spell to stop nightmares,
would sing out as one
‘til the sun stopped it’s rays.
now here we sit
just fifty years later;
four English teens
play accordion songs,
influenced only
by Gogol Bordello
the neighbours, they smile;
it’s been quiet so long.

Thought I'd post.
This is still being worked on.
Some things I said aren't very clear.
I may have a reshape.
I decided to post it before I buggered off.
I may not have picked up on flow problems because I wrote this to the tune of a Richard Thompson song and can't read it without it now.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#2
I just would like to keep this short and say I love what you did with the 'minor temptations' part. Oh, and would this piece's setting be around world war two and afterwards? or is that a dumb question
i need to hear some sounds that recognize the pain in me, yeah.
#3
Well, seeing as I said 50 years ago
But not particularly, just tradition from around then- doesn't have to be the war.
Cheers
I think if I redo this, that's where I'll work around.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!