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Alright, I guess its story time, aka WALL OF TEXT!!!

note- its not a pity thread about how much my life sucks, i'm just lookin for advice from the wise users of the pit. please no "didnt read it" posts. thanks!

a couple of months ago i moved to a new town where the only person i know is my older brother. i got a job and started to make friends with coworkers and whatnot. most of them are people i get along with and talk to during breaks, but there's one of them who i particularly like, sammi. she's cute and fun and easy to get along with and she's really a great friend, and we became fast friends/work buddies. last week she invited me to party with her and some of her friends, the first time i got to see somebody outside of work. we had a good time, her friends are good people. we both had saturday thru today off from work, so i knew she would party all weekend, but i thought i would see if i could join in since i don't really know anybody. so saturday when we leave she said she'd call me if she was gonna do anything sunday. she did, and she was with the two dudes we went with the day before, but we talked for maybe five minutes and didnt make any plans. she said she would call back in an hour, so i waited. and waited. and waited. about four hours later i called and she's like "i'm sorry, i'm still hanging out, i'll call you back when i'm done." she called the next day at 7pm. she said "i'm sorry i forgot to call you back, and i hate making you wait again, but can i call you back in a few hours?" i really wanted to ask her why she didnt call earlier and why she couldnt talk now, but i just said "sure". its now almost 3 pm today, no call back. i really don't know what the heck is going on, but i've got a couple of suspicions.

1) originally the party was gonna be at her house because her parents are gone for a few weeks, but they sent the grandparents over to hold down the fort, knowing there would be some partying. sammi said she hates her grandparents for various reasons, and they actually were pretty mean to the two guys who picked us up. so suspicion one is that she's in trouble with the grandparents and can't really talk.

2) the two guys, Mike and Randy, were nice guys, though i wonder a little about Randy. He's the one who drove us all out to this party, and let me tell you he was a bit of a showoff. he's 18 years old and owns a large chevy pickup and drives it like a sportscar/monster truck. he was always driving fast, burning rubber on the turns, throwing fishtails on the dirt roads and driving 60mph on the two-tracks which had a foot of clearance on either side of the truck before a wall of trees and bumps that would make most cars bottom out. he drank a ton and smoked some dope and then tried to tell people he could drive them home. i was the only one sober when we left, so i talked him into letting me drive (i drove a GMC suburban all through high school, my dad has a large truck and all of my relatives have trucks). My suspicion is that he either felt demasculated or he likes sammi, so he could have told her that i was no good (sammi didn't remember anything the next day and since she's been longtime friends with randy, its very possible she would believe him over me).

i see her all the time at work so i could just talk to her tomorrow, but i wanna call because i hate being blown off and stood up. at the same time, i dont wanna get on her nerves because she's the kind of person who doesn't take **** from people and i would hate to lose a friend like that.

So here are my questions...what do you guys think of this and what should i do?
Last edited by dudius at Aug 12, 2008,
They are called paragraphs. And you do not have any. GET SOME.

Good luck with your dilemma we can't help you.

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well you're in the pit so...stick it in her pooper lul


Don't keep pestering her. Give her some space and time and then ask if she wants to hang out again in a few days.

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tie her up and make her like you
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hmm. First off, good job on taking his keys, Drunk driving is a big deal, I've had a few relatives die from getting hit by a drunk driver.

Secondly, its important not to look too needy by calling her every chance you get. It was kinda messed up how she ditched you but I would just talk to her at work adn ask her nicely what happened.
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No way am I reading all that. I'll just take a guess from your title and I'll give you my advice. How about rape?
since i'm probably the only one who read that and understands it...I say you just wait until tomorrow at work to talk to her. You could just bring up the situation casually while talking and ask her what was up. act cool about it though so that she doesn't get pissed at you for nagging her. act like you're cool about the whole thing and i'm sure she wouldn't mind telling you.
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If she gets mad when you call to ask about being stood up, shes not really your friend. She shouldn't get mad at you because she messed up.
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bite your lip and let it go. she stood you up. it happens. get over it

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I think that you're in looooooove with her.

i couldn't say i love her, but i do like her a lot in that kind of way, if that helps anything.
i wouldnt worry too much about the second guy who bad mouthed you. i dont think women completely shut out someone because one of their irresponsible friends said something bad about them.

if she keeps blowing you off like that, either walk away from it or ask her whats going on and let her know that she has been rude towards you an you dont appreciate it.

other than that i cant recommend anything else except the usual pit responses of rape, kill and profit.

EDIT: oh i just read the other posts about not seeming too naggy and needy - neediness is a major turn off.
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I think you should stop being a whiney baby and leave her alone before she gets annoyed at you pestering her and she tells you to **** off. It happens all the time. My friends stand me up and I stand them up... sometimes you find something better to do than what you previously had planned on.
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a) She only became your friend a short while back, so she may not feel as attached to you as you do to her. Think about it. If she were a he, and he would have stood you up like that, then would you be complaining? I don't think so. It's only because of your liking her that you think you should get more attention.

b) See it from her prespective. Maybe she only thinks of you as a friend. It's hard to handle at first, but maybe you've been friend-zoned. And because your a new friend she does not feel that attached to you. I've seen it happen countless times.

From your thread title I though that that you were having troubles with like a childhood friend moving away or becoming a drug addict or something. When I actually your post, I realised it was just another rant of someone who's placing too much emphasis on a friendship that's a few months old.

Don't bother about it too much. Go out more. Make new friends. Meet women for the purpose of dating, rather than for friendships.

Sorry if I seem like an ass, I've just seen this type of thing happen very often. Give her space. Talk to her tomorrow. Everyone gets stood up. And she's not your 'good' friend, she's a friend. Don't place too much importance on this. It won't end well.

But good luck to you

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Last edited by spider666 at Aug 12, 2008,
Dude Nintendo 64 was the **** back best friends took mine too...and wouldnt give it back..The bastard took my pokemon stadium game with it. But i suppose i'll get it back in due time.

Good luck with the video games
for a minute i thought it staid "im having jesus with a good friend" before you have jesus id think about this first, you are going to have to go into months of labor and realize that hes going to die when hes like 30, not to meantion take it from god.
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Don't wait around for her, go have fun! If she can't make time to give you a call like she said she would, don't go out of your way to wait for it.

Go have fun. and if you have time you can go hang out with her. It sounds like you have the hots for this chick, if that's the case then I can understand your problem with these two other guys.
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You're a total pushover...

How could you possibly just say "sure" after she made you wait that long? Call her out on it.
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tie her up and make her like you
the old fashioned way

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Stop being so clingy and forget it. Don't make one person your portal to a social life. Don't call her again, let her call you.
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sounds like ur in the friend zone

and dont ever call it dope smoking again...
****. k that happens to me w/ my girlfriend. i think they just forget/
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Forget about her. Don't call her at all and just be sort of friendly at work. Don't chase after her!
Quote by dudius
i see her all the time at work so i could just talk to her tomorrow, but i wanna call because i hate being blown off and stood up. at the same time, i dont wanna get on her nerves because she's the kind of person who doesn't take **** from people and i would hate to lose a friend like that.

So here are my questions...what do you guys think of this and what should i do?

Your thread title was misleading because she doesn't sound like a good friend at all, I suspect that you just want to **** her in which case say so - I don't make threads about how my good friend Elisha Cuthbert won't return my calls .

She sounds like more trouble than she's worth, but just give it a few days and see what happens. If she calls you and grovels then it's fine but otherwise why worry about it? Do you really want a friend like that?
i fail to see the problem here?
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You're a total pushover...

How could you possibly just say "sure" after she made you wait that long? Call her out on it.

i was paraphrasing. when she said "can i call you in a few hours" i said "like you did yesterday?". that may have made her mad, but now its in the past.

and about meeting new people, thats where i have trouble. so far, work is my life. sammi is pretty much my key to meeting new people, at least until college starts up in a few weeks.

so pretty much from whateveryone said, i'm gonna play it cool and just ask her about it at work. i hate being blown off by anyone because i hate breaking plans, but you guys are right about the fact that its a new friendship and i'm becoming friend-zoned because she's my only new friend and i do have something of a crush on her.

thank you the pit! you are as wise, if not wiser, than i anticipated.
Last edited by dudius at Aug 12, 2008,
You don't need friends like that who bring you down. If she can't her crap straightened out and keep her word, don't bother with her.

Was that entire brick wall all about some girl not calling you twice? Is that it?

Dude. Not cool.
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Have a ****ing spaz at her and be honest or you'll never get anywhere, at the end of the day you're gonna hold all that dfrustration in and let it out on somebody who does not deserve it. Have a cow at her and enjoy your life.
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