#1
The days are passing by
and every time I'm with you
I feel this special vibe
Maybe you can feel it too

It's like the sun after the rain
It's like a rainbow in the sky
It's like my blood filled with cocaine
Which makes me feel so high

VERSE 2

When I look into your face
Into you perfect blue eyes
All I wanna do is gaze
And take a picture with my mind

And then I see you looking back
It's like a hole-in-one
It's like a millin dollar cheque
It's like my life's just begun


CHORUS

And now I see
How beautiful this life can be
(And) Honestly
Girl you mean the world to me

When you speak
Your voice sounds like a symphony
All I ever need
Is you here with me


VERSE 3

Every night I dream of you
The only thing i wish is
That one day this dream comes true
And you wake me with a kiss

Then I would hold you in my arms
I‘d never let you go
And I‘d whisper in your ear
What I feel inside my soul

CHORUS

BRIDGE

CHORUS

Don't be too hard, it's my first one!
But anyways post what you think please
Last edited by xghost88 at Aug 15, 2008,
#2
Overall I like it, but I think the first part of the chorus is a bit cliche, "(And) Honestly
Girl you mean the world to me" in particular. Apart from that bit, the chorus's fine. (Having said that, depending on how it's sung you probibly could get away with it).

I really like the verses, and the line "All I wanna do is gaze
And take a picture with my mind" really stands out to me- great stuff.

The way you've got that pre-chorusy "It's like..." x3 is really good. At first I thought that the 3rd verse kinda broke the cycle, but reading it again I'm not sure if I would want to replace the last 4 lines or not...It's a tough call.

So as I said before, overall I like it.
Good job.
#3
Thanks for the comment.
And to be honest I'm not really pleased myself with the last 4 lines of the 3rd verse. I kind of had a flow while doing the first two ones and the 3rd one was somehow really hard for me to do as well as the chorus.

But thanks for your critic I just might sit down and work on it again.