#1
my kite has a lock on the string
a flip flop thong holds it down
while i run down the field
chasing after a car door.
blinking yellow lights
that say yield
a dollar less than a pound.

credible excitement
nine to seventeen
mopped out the house of a gringo
while they sipped bomb -bay
underneath a psalm tree.
Quote by ottoavist

i suppose there's a chance
i'm just a litte too shallow to consider
that maybe i've been a little more eager
each day to wake up and take a shower
brush my teeth and smile for the mirror
#2
lmfao

nice

real creative

could be a bit longer, though
Epiphone: Les paul Custom SB
Line Six Spider III 15
70$ wal-mart brand acoustic

Quote by black amendment
You're awesome, dude.
#3
all in all it made me chuckle. the last line in the first stanza felt out of place (can't say why). the last line in the last stanza made me cringe.

I'll be back to explain.
#4
Tsoy, are you mocking me? Please only write something if you think I'll want to hear it, whether it be constructive criticism or a comment. Thanks.
Quote by ottoavist

i suppose there's a chance
i'm just a litte too shallow to consider
that maybe i've been a little more eager
each day to wake up and take a shower
brush my teeth and smile for the mirror