#1
choose a year, pretend you were a person your age who got sent to 2008. talk the way they talked in the year you came from.
#2
The year is 1856, I am a young boy named Jeremy who likes to play in the street by my house. One day I see a huge gaping worm hole and I walk right in. As I come out the other side the streets are dark and dirty. I look over to see two kids running "FASTER TOM! RUN!" I hear in the distance. As I watch this unfold I then hear "Russell what the ****!?". And from that moment I was inspired by that. Now I am always stared at when ever I mutter those sayings.
UG Republican

Quote by Moggan13
I'm dissapointed by the lack of penis.

If anyone sigs that, i'll fucking kill them.


Quote by xyz66
YES!!!

And I enjoy Katy Perry's music.


I swear to god nobody better sig this or else imma kill them
#3
Beep beep boop bop beep. Boop boop. Bo-HHHHHNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGG.
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#5
Quote by Gods Waffle
The year is 1856, I am a young boy named Jeremy who likes to play in the street by my house. One day I see a huge gaping worm hole and I walk right in. As I come out the other side the streets are dark and dirty. I look over to see two kids running "FASTER TOM! RUN!" I hear in the distance. As I watch this unfold I then hear "Russell what the ****!?". And from that moment I was inspired by that. Now I am always stared at when ever I mutter those sayings.



...
You like it
#6
Quote by linus.d
...


You heard me damn it.
UG Republican

Quote by Moggan13
I'm dissapointed by the lack of penis.

If anyone sigs that, i'll fucking kill them.


Quote by xyz66
YES!!!

And I enjoy Katy Perry's music.


I swear to god nobody better sig this or else imma kill them
#8
Ung Ung Ung Ung Ureh Ung
In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.

Quote by Lord-O-Donuts
Banned for being the coolest April 08'er on UG.


please check out my own album:
almilano.bandcamp.com
#10
1880: damn that swine (yes damn him) oh lord take me to thy right hand and let me pluck thine enemys eyebrows
#12
Quote by Gods Waffle
You heard me damn it.



1856, eh...

How scared was you when you saw a car? Would've been fun to see..

did you pee your pants?
You like it
#13
Late 1800's

I fall into a fitful sleep on the gay humid night after the grand Ball. Alas, upon my awakening a shiver went down my spine, course blankets suffocated my very skin, a dreadful sound blasted from outside the thin door. A man with long hair walked in, wearing worker clothes. "'ello there! took ya a while to wake up!" My ears must deceive me, it sounds like a girl. "I beg your p-pardon?" I whisper, not knowing what was standing in front of me. Should I get up to greet it? Or should I cover myself, as I felt my wrists bear? I choose the later. "Who might you be?" I ask quietly, pulling the blanket up to my chin. "I'm Torree! I'm ys house mum." (boy she talks fast, my poor ears can't keep up!) "But your wearing pants! Good heavens! Do put a skirt on before someone sees you! What would your Pa say?"

I got bored... won't continue
#14
Quote by linus.d
1856, eh...

How scared was you when you saw a car? Would've been fun to see..

did you pee your pants?



Well when I saw the amazing saying unfold, I was in the middle of the street. After, somebody yelled "Look out faggot theres a car!" I instantly saw that automotive contraption and thought this was said "car". After I got out of the way I immediately yelled out "Russell! What the ****!?"
UG Republican

Quote by Moggan13
I'm dissapointed by the lack of penis.

If anyone sigs that, i'll fucking kill them.


Quote by xyz66
YES!!!

And I enjoy Katy Perry's music.


I swear to god nobody better sig this or else imma kill them
#18
THIS IS ....


wait where the **** are we?
I just need about $3.50
(<X.X)O=('.'Q)

I'm the motherflippin'
#19
Ug. Ogga stumpfdumpa. Futumpsh? (These are the actual words of the man who invented the wheel. Roughly translated it reads: "Oh. Hairy transvestites. What's this?")
#20
The year is 2008 it is august. It is 11:30 A.M.

There I am; walkin' down the street when I hear in the distance: "FASTER TOM! RUN!!!"
I look around to see two kids running down the street. The other kid replies: "RUSSELL! WHAT THE ****!"
they're running right at me. I make a quick turn into an ally and see time machine. I climb in and look at the controls. They're very complicated; so i just press a bunch of buttons.
BEEEEEEP.BOOOOP.BWOOOOOOP.
POW!
I step out of the time machine. I'm in an ally. I see a newspaper sticking out of the dumpster. It says they year. and the date. hmm...
I look at my watch. It says the time: 11:32 A.M, August,2008

...

I'M IN THE FUTURE!!!!!!!

This is Larry The If you click him, he will give you magic powers.
srsly.


If you are not willing to die for the perfect s'more, Then you don't deserve a s'more at all.
#21
hello I am Baby Joel from 23 October 2014 0:17 GMT -4

Man I really miss the "good old days". no calling people 'dorks' or 'nerds' or 'losers' in this thread. Amazing jokes and what a great community.
superman is killing himself tonight
#23
1995:

Did you hear the new smashing pumpkins album? It's totally rad!
Quote by lolmnt
I love to have my vag pounded by guys who make lame threads on the internet!


Quote by snipelfritz
This thread topic is gold. I've been on this website for 8 years and I've never come up with anything like this. So yeah. Great job TS[457undead].
#24
The year is 1955. The DeLorean is out of juice, and I have no idea where I can find 1.21 gigawatts in this era.
THE FORUM UPDATE KILLED THE GRADIENT STAR

Baltimore Orioles: 2014 AL Eastern Division Champions, 2017: 50-54
Baltimore Ravens: 2012 World Champions, 2017: 0-0
2017 NFL Pick 'Em: 0-0
#25
the year is 2010.

i find my past self, punch me in the face and tell me not to **** up in college.

and to not be such a pussy and to tell the hot blue haired chick her boyfriend's a douche and she should be with me instead.


...

i wish i had a time machine.
mugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmugmug
#26
The year is 697

Oft Scyld Scefing sceaþena þreatum,
monegum mægþum meodosetla ofteah,
egsode eorlas, syððanærest wearð
feasceaft funden; he þæs frofre gebad,
weox under wolcnum weorðmyndum þah,
oð þæt him æghwylc ymbsittendra
ofer hronrade hyran scolde,
gomban gyldan; þæt wæs god cyning!
Quote by Fat Lard
Why would you spend tens of thousands of dollars to learn about a language you already speak? It was over before it even started dude

Quote by captainsnazz
brot pls
#27
The year is whatever.

I'm white so it's cool

/LouieCKBit
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#28
Quote by jakesmellspoo
and to not be such a pussy and to tell the hot blue haired chick her boyfriend's a douche and she should be with me instead.


it would of never worked out between us

the year is 2011. I try to convince myself to not make a Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, or join UG in order to do something more productive with my life other than posting #memes and jacking off. But I tell my future self to fuck off because #memes are #quality comedy and jacking off serves well to pass the time

The cycle continues
bawitaba a bang a bang diggy diggy diggy sed the boogie sed up jump the boogie
#29
I think all I could say to 2008 snipelfritz is to try actively to get laid more. He was well into (actually "in the prime of" probably) the partying phase at that point.
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#31
Oh wow, I was typing a detailed message to myself in 2008 that was supposed to be funny, but it took a turn for the sad and depressing.

Instead I'll just leave you with this:
Hey dickface, do your homework.
#32
Quote by ultimate-slash
Oh wow, I was typing a detailed message to myself in 2008 that was supposed to be funny, but it took a turn for the sad and depressing.

Instead I'll just leave you with this:
Hey dickface, do your homework.

lol, I suppose in retrospect, my recent advice to my past self was "Hey, bang that one redhead with the braces" after I had to drop out of school and move back in with my parents.

Honestly, I suppose that says something about me...

(for the record I have my degree and don't live with my parents now...)
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#33
Yeah, for me it also involved quitting college and stuff (started a new course about 7-8 months after that).
It's funny though, because I think that focusing more on getting laid would have solved some/most of the problems I had at that time. Though even now I'm not sure if I would do that even if I could start again.
#35
Eh, what I meant to say was that I don't have to go back and do that, because I make up for it every day...
#36
Yeah dude, that's the best way to do it. Do it hard.
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#38
Quote by ultimate-slash
I do it hard and sexy like a horseshoe crab.

Wut?
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
#39
I was thinking of hard animals (hard as in having a shell or whatever) and that was the first thing that popped into my head.

Note to self: don't use the word 'crab' when describing sexy time.