#1
Standing in the street
Staring at the sky,
Praying time will stop
As i watch it fly by,
Wonderin about the future
Thinkin about the past
The years have gone by so fast..

Now....
Time needs to slow down
I cant stand it anymore
Im staring life in the eyes
As i walk through that door
Im scared to death of the future
but tonight..
Im ready or more

Now im sitting in my car
Lookin up at all the stars
Wondering where the time goes
As i look back at all the scars
The world spins faster
Im hopeing it will stop
Right now thats not lookin so hot

Now....
Time needs to slow down
I cant stand it anymore
Im staring the world in the eyes
As it knocks me to the floor
Im scared to death of the future
But tonigh..
Im ready for more

Im laying on the ground
And i cant seem to stand
The thing that i found
Is life doesnt always go as planned
Times not slowing
and the worlds gonna spin
Now its my time to win

Now....
I dont care if time stops
It doesnt matter anymore
Ive grabbed life bu the throat
And realized what times really for
Im not scared of the future
Cause tonight...
Im ready for more
#2
really great for your first posted piece here, good job and thanks for the comment on mine
#3
Ahh I liked this a lot, I can relate to it well. I liked the wording especially as it got the feeling across without over-complicating it.
#4
its good lyrics and evertying but its really short verses. could b longer verses i really like the chorus
#5
Hey man, thanks for the positive crit, really appreciate it. For future reference, it's easier to return crits if you put a link in your post or signature.

I think this piece has some potential, and I like the overall idea, a lot of people can relate to it. However, it gets dragged down by some generic and cliche lines, ie 'Now its my time to win'. Its not necessarily a bad line, but its not exactly descriptive, unique, or inspirational. It's not that every line has to be a world-beater, just that I think this piece has a few too many vanilla lines and not enough that stand out.