#1
Song i wrote in my free time, enjoy. Please give me hints on how to improve, this is my first song.


Your words they penetrate my head
As i remember the things i said
These lies are running through
and now its only me and you
I cant say that I'm sorry
But baby don't worry
Lets do this together
I'll love you forever


Wont you stay in my heart
Don't let this tear us apart
Wont you stay in my head
Don't let this be the end
As i move, as i move
Cautiously Away.


You can't say i didn't care
Cause baby i was always there
I'm sick of all these fights
Why cant i just hold you tight?
I tried everything i knew
It just wasn't enough for you
Cant we work this out?
Its nothing to cry about


Wont you stay in my heart
Don't let this tear us apart
Wont you stay in my head
Don't let this be the end
As i move, as i move
Cautiously Away.


Were the nights with me
The best they could ever be?
Did you ever wish
For just one more kiss?
When i say bye
Baby do you start to cry?
If I'm ever away
Do you think about me all day?


Wont you stay in my heart
Don't let this tear us apart
Wont you stay in my head
Don't let this be the end
As i move, as i move
Cautiously Away.


Are you leaving tonight?
Could i make things right?
Will you push me to do
the things you told me to?
If i look into your eyes
will you forgive my lies?
All i want is you
Why cant you feel it too?


Wont you stay in my heart
Don't let this tear us apart
Wont you stay in my head
Don't let this be the end
As i move, as i move
Cautiously Away, away
As i move, cautiously away.
Last edited by Bogart42 at Aug 30, 2008,
#2
Definately not bad for a first, you got some good rhymes in there

How is the tempo of the song?
"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not."

~ Kurt Cobain ~