bloodshed344
UG Newbie
Join date: Nov 2007
1,673 IQ
#1
It needs a bit of work, but it has some of my best ideas in it. I consider it done lengthwise but I don't think the transitions and stuff are quite done. If you would so kindly crit this and help me out I would gladly crit one of your songs in return.

Also, +1 if you can guess which one of my songs it leads into, not that hard to figure out.

EDIT: NEW VERSION UP 11/2/08
Attachments:
Nonfluence.zip
Last edited by bloodshed344 at Nov 2, 2008,
AA00P
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2008
87 IQ
#2
I don't care how good your music could ever be, if it's labeled as 'progcore', it's instantly horrible.

As for the actual song, it sounds kinda jingly. Like elevator music, or something?
AA00P
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2008
87 IQ
#4
Meh. Further into it, I heard teh br00talz.

Good song. But I absolutely hate those -core terms.
bakshandloomis
Ug's Metalcore fanboy
Join date: Sep 2006
519 IQ
#5
Quote by AA00P
I don't care how good your music could ever be, if it's labeled as 'progcore', it's instantly horrible.


And to no one's surprise, you're an 08er.

As for the song, starts out with a nice chord progression and nice bass solo/lead. Just so far, this is quite a bit different than your other stuff, but still good. The time signature changes are amazing, very nice work. That part starting at bar 77 would sound better with power chord I think; there's a place for 4ths, but it's not here. The breakdownish riff at 93 is fantastic. At 125 it's a bit boring without the lead, I'm assuming you will add vocals? If so, that should fix that problem. The part at 157=pure win. The solo following was kind of a let down; it was fine as is, but nothing special, which is something I'm sure you could pull off. I think you should have ended the song at 240.
Definitely a good song, right now I'd give it an 8/10.


C4C?
http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=949908
Quote by fob12
Him -"Hey, give me a high five!"
Her -"hahaha why? *high fives*"
Him - "Because I just dumped you for the lulz!"
Her -"... what?"
Him -"*runs away*"


Quote by Lefty7Stringer
killswitch engage has some dissonant riffs, they're kind grindcore tho

PinkIsCool
UG's Pink Pirate!
Join date: Mar 2006
2,002 IQ
#6
Quote by AA00P
I don't care how good your music could ever be, if it's labeled as 'progcore', it's instantly horrible.

As for the actual song, it sounds kinda jingly. Like elevator music, or something?

Shut up.

As for the song, I really liked it. The metal was more appealing to me than the intro segment, but it was all VERY well done. There were some spots though where you layered the snare, which I didn't understand cause that just makes it too loud.
I'm a person.
bloodshed344
UG Newbie
Join date: Nov 2007
1,673 IQ
#7
I forgot to mention that the solo was kinda just a placeholder. Also, pinkiscool, maybe you mean the flams? Did you listen to the MIDI because they make the flams sound weird.

Also, thanks for the 5ths suggestion, it does sound a bit better with 5ths.


OH WAIT, the "solo" you are referring to is actually just a lead bit, and I like it.
Last edited by bloodshed344 at Sep 3, 2008,
AA00P
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2008
87 IQ
#8
Perhaps my phrasing was off-
I BASHED THE TERM 'progcore'! NOT THE SONG, DAMMIT!
ch715dallat
BTBAM=Godly
Join date: Jun 2006
3,466 IQ
#10
Quote by AA00P
Perhaps my phrasing was off-
I BASHED THE TERM 'progcore'! NOT THE SONG, DAMMIT!


thats what we're talking about you retard, you cant just bash a genre because it has core in it, therefore youre a tool. its progressive metal with core elements i.e progcore so shut up and stop bashing core genres to sound cool and be accepted
AA00P
Registered User
Join date: Feb 2008
87 IQ
#11
Quote by ch715dallat
thats what we're talking about you retard, you cant just bash a genre because it has core in it, therefore youre a tool. its progressive metal with core elements i.e progcore so shut up and stop bashing core genres to sound cool and be accepted

Some of my favorite bands have -cores...

It's not the genre itself, it's the overused -core term. I see the [insert name of subgenre]-core used so much.

Mathcore, artcore, progcore, beatcore, deathcore...

****it. Whatever. I surrender, you're right and I'm wrong. I apologize.
bloodshed344
UG Newbie
Join date: Nov 2007
1,673 IQ
#12
They're all genres and they all are different. You wouldn't complain to a wine taster about being so strict on the grouping would you? Or how dumb the terms he used were as long as he was correct?

Anyway, I recognize your admittance of being wrong by the way. If you or any of the other people that started arguments in my topic want to continue, go ahead. Your just bumping my song up.
NinjaCrowLives
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2008
54 IQ
#13
Generally a good song, however the drums in the intro pissed me off for some reason, when it goes mental and then into like a funky kinda thing was pretty good, good transisitons and such

but the one thing that lets me down is the intro drums, something doesnt sit right with me there, might be because its midi, 8.5/10
bloodshed344
UG Newbie
Join date: Nov 2007
1,673 IQ
#16
Quote by HeavyMetaldude
117-124 was sexcellent. The whole beginning section was great. I like the polyphonic jazz guitar battle. The basslines were superb.

Crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=951539

I like the fact that you used intelligent sentences, but this doesn't even qualify as a crit. Could you maybe, I dunno, get a bit more indepth?
madhampster
Yes, I know it's hamster.
Join date: Feb 2005
229 IQ
#17
Clean intro is great. The synth is pretty cool. And the bass blends well. woah was that a guero (sp?). Awesome. Measures 32-47 Were great with that guitar riff. Love the solo. The bass is still awesome. 94-107 made me head bang lol. damnit 117-134 made me head bang again. I love the lead during that part. And the heavy bass duh duh. I didn't however really like measures 139-150. Seemed kind of out of place. The Rock organ was pretty cool. The Return to the jazzy stuff was too awesome.

Overall a very good song. I really liked this.
overall: 8.5/10

Crit for crit? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=951138
Jeff Loomis

Myspace.com/geneticbydesign
Last edited by madhampster at Sep 5, 2008,
Slaytanic1993
Wakka wakka
Join date: Jun 2007
2,620 IQ
#18
I didn't really liked the intro progression, too...I dunno the word, maybe weak? It got a bit better when the bass kicked in though. Bar 32 onwards was fairly cool. Really did not like the bit at 48 onwards.

The distortion bits were farily cool as well, but nothing that really dragged my interest, to be honest. Bar 157 sounded like the progression of the Peanuts cartoon, but raped up a tad.

The re-emergence of the intro didn't bode, to me.

You shouldn't have doubled the song over, made it a bit boring actually. 7/10.
R.I.P. Charles Michael "Evil Chuck" Schuldiner
B. May 13 1967 - D. December 13 2001

Quote by eggsandham2
cuz ppl hate how power metal they are cuz they think its "gay" or w.e, which is immature and dirogitory