#1
1: Learn the rules. Master them. Then give it twenty years.
2: If that fails, then start buying in the beers.


Good luck, all.
Last edited by Jammydude44 at Sep 9, 2008,
#2
wow.
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wake me up when september ends makes me cry evry time!

emos forever
:-(
#3
I don't think you're sure of this, hence the change.

It would be perfectly digestible if you got the phrasing right, but I don't think it's anything greater than that I'm afraid.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#4
i don't like the title, or the piece. "Cures?" it's like you're saying it's a disease.
personally Jamie(and please don't take offense to this), if you would've taken your own advice in this poem, and wrote it about twenty years from now; it probably would've soared in magnificence. but, right now it's nothing. i see where you were trying to take it, but that's a very narrow road that widens as a writer matures.

the main thing that people look for in little snippets of epiphany/revelations like this, is experience. not ending on a note like "That's it." it(as an entity) should never be ending, but only the person that gives up on it or dies as a medium from which it's projected.
sorry man. feel free to debate this; i'd like to hear your own take on it.
- Kent

EDIT: backtracking; maybe it's just the fact that i don't like the subject matter. it feels really pretentious the way that it's presented too. idk, i guess there's no reason for confused feelings. don't listen to me till i can get this straight.
There's a road that leads to the end of all suffering. You should take it.


- Jericho Caine


secret, aaaaagent maaan.
secret, aaaaagent maaan.
Last edited by ottoavist at Sep 9, 2008,
#5
This isn't philosphical. This is light verse, and a total rip-off of a cool wendy cope poem.

I edited the small text. It wasn't part of the piece, Lol.

Thanks for clicking, guys and gals.

<3

EDIT:

and

if you would've taken your own advice in this poem, and wrote it about twenty years from now; it probably would've soared in magnificence. but, right now it's nothing. i see where you were trying to take it, but that's a very narrow road that widens as a writer matures.

the main thing that people look for in little snippets of epiphany/revelations like this, is experience.


Lol, meaning of the piece ?
#6
Eh, the second bit seemed different when I read it the first time.
There's only one thing we can do to thwart the plot of these albino shape-shifting lizard BITCHES!
#8
yeah, you're right.
guess it flew right past me.
<3

doesn't change the way i feel though, concerning the piece itself.
i'd much rather read one of your longer pieces.
There's a road that leads to the end of all suffering. You should take it.


- Jericho Caine


secret, aaaaagent maaan.
secret, aaaaagent maaan.
#9
Am I the only person who quite liked this?

I thought the way "2" was phrased was shit, but the point you were trying to make was a good one and the way you attacked it was admirable, if kinda rushed. I think the reason it's gone down badly is because there's only 3 lines, and so things that felt wrong, which may have blended in with better bits in a longer piece, were very obvious.
I play by my own rules. And I have one rule; There are no rules... but if there are, they're there to be broken. Even this one.


Confused? Good.

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^ Irony

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#11
Its not a cure for poetry . Its a cure for everything .

Glad to see that u are still posting here
Hi
#13
Quote by Jammydude44
Lol @ that this is pretentious.

Good luck all. Love you.

It's lovely as a good-bye piece and it wasn't pretentious. Still shit though. Bye man.