#1
So, I have always struggled with lyrics. I have music coming out my ass but no serious lyrics to complete a song. Me and a couple friends have a few songs, but they are all light and funny, sort of tenacious D style. I think we have the potential to actually be a serious band, but we have no lyrics. So I decided to try to write some and here's what I came up with.

This first song is supposed to be a slower ballad type song with acoustic chords as the backing music. (this is the very first serious song I started to write when I was bummed out for the end of summer)

Welcome back to reality
All the places you've got to see
Before it all comes to an end.

Back to life and dreams and school
Into the deep end of the pool
Finding out who's your true friends

Yeah, that's all I have so far but I think it is a good start. From there an electric guitar solo comes in and then it flows into a sort of chorus that I haven't got lyrics for yet.


This next song is more of a punk type "rock out" Offspring type jam. I really like what I have written as far as music goes, but I am really worried about the corniness of these lyrics. Tell me what you think, be brutally honest please. Here they are.

When your jammin all night on a Saturday
An' your Mama comes in, what does she say
Your rocking so loud that you cannot hear
she said "turn it down, Turn it down or you'll hurt your ear"

CHORUS
Don't tell me to turn it down
I want my music heard by everyone around
Don't tell me to turn it down
I want to have my song played all over the town


That's all I have so far on that one, really, I think it sounds kinda corny, but alot of those kinds of songs do, so LMK if it is over the top. Thanks, and I will comment yours if you comment mine.
#2
the second one is too corny. I used to write songs like this but I kept writing. just keep writing. you'll get better.