Okay UG, this is a message from a concerned mother who has recently been forced to deal with ridiculous circumstances for which I have found out that this website is atrociously responsible.

I am a proud single mother, with a 12 year old son. My son has recently picked up guitar, some pointy thing with a weird name. I'm sure you all will know what I'm talking about. Since then, he has been holed up in his room even more than usual for the last few months, and has become increasingly hostile with both me and other family members. Now I would normally just chalk this up to typical behavior from a boy nearing puberty, but recent events have left me in shack and awe, as well as aghast horror.

Because of my living situation, there are times that I simply cannot be home, and would rather not leave my child home alone. So, like any mother would, I hire a babysitter of a good friend. She's a really nice girl, about the age of 16 or 17. My son has never had a problem with her, as far as I know. But something has gone horrible wrong.

A few days ago, while away, I received a distressed phonecall from home. Apparently, my son has sexually assaulted this poor girl trying to babysit him. What made no sense at the time, is now only too clear. Apparently at the time, he was screaming "UG FTW!" Thankfully, she was able to subdue him without any major harm done. His monstrous guitar is now broken (Thank God), but time has yet to tell if her family will pursue legal action.

Thank you UG, for destroying my son.
Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.

I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.